I think the ‘poor me’ columns are even worse than the ‘I’m catnip to men’ ones. ‘Why couldn’t the nurse have a warm smile?’ Has our Liz ever had a warm smile for anyone on earth??
Liz Jones - You Magazine Columnist
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Funny, isn’t it, that all her interactions with doctors/receptionists/hotel workers/spa/retail/cabin crew/wait staff etc are overwhelming negative?
Why could that be, I wonder??
Why could that be, I wonder??
duck me..... Moan, moan, moan, moan....ad nauseum infinitum. What a whiny bratty cow she is. She writes the most boring column on this earth. Is it too much to ask she loses feeling in her writing hand and gives all a break. I worked in the NHS for 32 years and know her type, snotty, whingy and entitled.
The gall of a whiny old hag who was bankrupted over her non-payment of taxes that fund the NHS moaning about how she was treated really takes the biscuit. I suspect the vomit/ambulance story has a great deal more to do with her drinking than anything else... I imagine the ambulance crew were thrilled to be dealing with an old soak when there were other, really ill people needing their services.
The visit to the doctor/hospital is a pile of bollocks that didn't happen.
Podcast (I listen so you don't have to): Liz was "trolled" on Twitter over an old article she wrote when Amy Winehouse was alive, the headline of which called her "Amy Declinehouse." A friend of Amy quoted it in a documentary and then Liz supposedly was piled on. Liz said she does not write the headlines. She reads out the article in question from her "archive." The article called Amy self-obsessed, accused her family and record company of not trying to help her, and attempted to amateurishly psychoanalyse her. Liz implied Amy may have been autistic or had narcissistic personality disorder, and talks about bright but selfish young women who "think they deserve an interesting life." Many deeply personal, potentially embarrassing details are given about Liz's sister and sister-in-law both suffering with alcoholism; and a friend's daughter who was addicted to heroin.
Liz says she has always identified with Amy because they both had eating disorders, and Amy writing "Back to Black" about her break-up is just like Liz writing about Nirpal and David. She repeats that she didn't write the offending headline. Liz says her article was deeply sympathetic to Amy yet none of the "trolls" actually read it - in this case it's a good thing they didn't! As usual Nic kisses Liz's Myla-clad arse. Liz compares herself to Emma Raducanu and (again) Meghan Markle. She sneers at Nic's cultural ignorance and "boring" reading material. Nic states that she doesn't always understand when something presented for entertainment isn't real (such as Leigh Francis' Keith Lemon character.) Liz calls Kate Humble "bourgeois" and, in all seriousness, compares her to Hitler for raising lambs to eat. The REAL minimalist is Liz, because she had to sell everything!
Finally, we get onto the week's column. Liz received a call from her "ex-ex" the Fake Rock Star, who had stormed out on her after her birthday dinner. Liz thinks phone calls are sooooo 1980s and no one uses the phone any more. The "ex-ex" announced he had a new girlfriend. He's still Liz's ex then, isn't he. He says his girlfriend is 26 years old, Liz hates young women but only because they use their smartphones too much and don't know who the Beatles were. He wanted Liz to hear it from him before she saw it in the press, her oh so witty retort to this was "I thought Melody Maker had shut down?" Liz calls him her "cast-off." She predicts the relationship won't last because he "mansplains" and is rude to waitresses, which Liz would never, ever do. She points out Nirpal was 26 when they started dating and says that now Nirpal talks about her as if she were Harvey Weinstein. It's not QUITE the same thing, is it, Liz?
Liz says she has always identified with Amy because they both had eating disorders, and Amy writing "Back to Black" about her break-up is just like Liz writing about Nirpal and David. She repeats that she didn't write the offending headline. Liz says her article was deeply sympathetic to Amy yet none of the "trolls" actually read it - in this case it's a good thing they didn't! As usual Nic kisses Liz's Myla-clad arse. Liz compares herself to Emma Raducanu and (again) Meghan Markle. She sneers at Nic's cultural ignorance and "boring" reading material. Nic states that she doesn't always understand when something presented for entertainment isn't real (such as Leigh Francis' Keith Lemon character.) Liz calls Kate Humble "bourgeois" and, in all seriousness, compares her to Hitler for raising lambs to eat. The REAL minimalist is Liz, because she had to sell everything!
Finally, we get onto the week's column. Liz received a call from her "ex-ex" the Fake Rock Star, who had stormed out on her after her birthday dinner. Liz thinks phone calls are sooooo 1980s and no one uses the phone any more. The "ex-ex" announced he had a new girlfriend. He's still Liz's ex then, isn't he. He says his girlfriend is 26 years old, Liz hates young women but only because they use their smartphones too much and don't know who the Beatles were. He wanted Liz to hear it from him before she saw it in the press, her oh so witty retort to this was "I thought Melody Maker had shut down?" Liz calls him her "cast-off." She predicts the relationship won't last because he "mansplains" and is rude to waitresses, which Liz would never, ever do. She points out Nirpal was 26 when they started dating and says that now Nirpal talks about her as if she were Harvey Weinstein. It's not QUITE the same thing, is it, Liz?
So much to unpack. But as testament to her awfulness i can’t actually be bothered
I can't actually find ANY tweets where anyone has mentioned Liz in connection with the Amy Winehouse article. I did however find this one:
Being of Chinese descent, am I allowed to say a hearty "up yours?"
Being of Chinese descent, am I allowed to say a hearty "up yours?"
That’s disgusting! How low can she go?!
Yes you may! And I shall join you. Loathsome human being, isn't she? Wll, there it is, for all to see. Despite her protestations, I knew she was racist.
I never knew that although it doesn't surprise me. Almost makes me feel guilty for giving her any airtime now. Absolute witch.
Bet she is incandescent about being cast off for someone aged 26. For some reason she thought she had this big dicked 'rock' star at her beck and call.
As an older single woman I have learned that my dating value has dropped massively in the last few years. It's a real shock to the ego after having been a young hottie for years and fighting off the attention, such an ego destroyer
The rock star doesn't exist. At least, he and LJ never had this steamy relationship she claims they did, so he's not her ex-ex because he was never her boyfriend. Much discussion of this matter on another forum has come up with the theory that although she might have met and interviewed him at some point, and even been on a few dates with him, there was never a relationship.I never knew that although it doesn't surprise me. Almost makes me feel guilty for giving her any airtime now. Absolute witch.
Bet she is incandescent about being cast off for someone aged 26. For some reason she thought she had this big dicked 'rock' star at her beck and call.
As an older single woman I have learned that my dating value has dropped massively in the last few years. It's a real shock to the ego after having been a young hottie for years and fighting off the attention, such an ego destroyer
Which would absolutely make sense and was good fodder for her column for many years. I fell for it, I wanted to know who he was! However, how has no one ever seen them together? They’ve never been papped together, no ‘sources’ or close friends (of him, obvs) have come forward to out them. It just can’t be true and pure fabrication for column inches.
It is probably someone minor, like out of The Wurzels or Barron Knights if they exist at all. Look them up if you are too young!
Or Black Lace - Liz would be after the Rights to "Agadoo"
Black Lace - Agadoo
\"What's a nice pineapple like you doing in a place like this?\" Good question. This camp and bad and wonderful video hit is a cover version of a French song featuring cancan dancers. Go figure.
The thing is Liz DOES seem to get a fair amount of male attention despite being in her 60s. But, yeah, since the "Rock Star" was never real it seems she's essentially invented a fictional love triangle for herself: "what would a man that age in that position do? Run off with someone young enough to be his granddaughter!"I never knew that although it doesn't surprise me. Almost makes me feel guilty for giving her any airtime now. Absolute witch.
Bet she is incandescent about being cast off for someone aged 26. For some reason she thought she had this big dicked 'rock' star at her beck and call.
As an older single woman I have learned that my dating value has dropped massively in the last few years. It's a real shock to the ego after having been a young hottie for years and fighting off the attention, such an ego destroyer
Does she though , or is it all in her head / imagined for her column
That is very trueDoes she though , or is it all in her head / imagined for her column
Also, what's with the whole "it's SO RUDE to ask someone if they have their hearing aids in?" Why is it rude if you want them to be able to actually hear you? After all isn't Liz supposed to be "profoundly deaf"
The FRS never existed. She wriggled out of being 'outed' as a liar by claiming he'd shagged a casual pick-up in her 'London flat' (a rental the DM paid for before they sacked her) and she'd dumped him.
Had this been true, she would have raked over the outrage for years. As it is, she never mentioned it again.
Her memory is so damaged by her thirst and her disdain for her readers is such that she thinks everyone hangs on her every word and, like her, instantly forgets it.
Had this been true, she would have raked over the outrage for years. As it is, she never mentioned it again.
Her memory is so damaged by her thirst and her disdain for her readers is such that she thinks everyone hangs on her every word and, like her, instantly forgets it.
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