Terracotta! Roof tile orange!Dont forget .... also now a " person of colour " ( a very burnt orange colour, but none the less, still COLOUR!! )
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Aha!!!!!
Ronseal does exactly what it says on the Tin.
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paps change her skin colour? So when she gives birth to baby Sheesh she can say the paps are changing her skin colour? Hope baby doesn't get near the paps wind machine! Might end up in a different postcode area!! 
Those legs are dreadful and that was from years ago...
I have this idea in my head that she actually believes a stork will deliver her baby.
She's such a wild buffoon!
Thanks for the laughs though Lozza
Thanks for the laughs though Lozza
Like who does she think she is? Why does she feel she's so famous they'd do that? Honestly. It's bafflingDamn those pesky paps! ... How sneaky of them to spend so much time, energy, even cash ... just to make lumpylardarse look fat with their extreme wind machines, and her being a " person of colour " making her whiter!! ... Surely there are laws in place, that could stop all this interfering in lardylumps life ..... I look forward to the next mag shoot ... where the nasty photographer " forcingly " edits all her pics to the hilt ... where she resembles an orange alien with constipation!! poor, poor lardylumparse, we all feel for you, so hounded
She goes from bad to worse, with every silly comment .... it is said, the real father, is a moroccan waiter from that place sheesh, Ive read many commenting the same, some were certain, this is the real truth, maybe they know the real story ... whos skin is slightly a darker shade than lumpys .... we`ll have to wait and see, once lil laurlielanacan makes her appearance, will she have moroccan features, like her real daddy ( who are quite nice looking people ) or be burnt orange, like mother dearest ... the plot thickens!
She is such a wanker
She's a BAFTA winning queen of the silver screen - bigger than Beyonce!Like who does she think she is? Why does she feel she's so famous they'd do that? Honestly. It's baffling
ETA - that wasn't planned, but she is bigger than B
Bless her, we all have fantasies. Lozza's is having a bewful baby gel handed to her wrapped in silk after a 2 minute laybeh all clean and smelling like talc. My fantasy is sitting on Jake Gyllenhall's face but hey we can't have everything!
Who's the #jelhater in this clip?
she's hideousI think you're right, judging by all the crap she has been spouting all through this " 14 month " pregnancy ( and counting ) this lil mite will definately be delivered by stork, all brand new, perfect and fluffy .... I hope its a boy! that should shut her fat moosh up!
But that's how baybeez arrive? Chaz is already waiting for the stawk.
Bewfel Yungels always arrive by stawk.
OMG this thread is KILLING me.
Looooool ..... I wouldn't say no, having to use Jason Momoa's face, as a resting place!! My goodness, I would wriggle and tiggle, soo much to make myself really comfortable!
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Don’t be oompa-loomperist
Clearly she is a pale skinned Anglo Saxon, I’d say she probably has freckles and burns naturally.
What a twit
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Here's a thought and don't ask me why I'm suddenly being her mental bleeping health advocate (I blame the three packs of crisps I just hoovered into my mouth) . Big Loz is obsessed with giving off this bullshit perfect image, ok no one believes it but she does and it's all about image so having sleep, a neat bump, Lauliè being perfect etc. I find that concerning as she's such a stubborn cow that she would suffer in silence if she did need help rather than admit everything isn't #perfect and that's a worry not just for her but especially for Lauliè.
Well it used to be Under a Gooseberry Bush but with Lozza I expect it will be under a Sweetcorn Tree instead
(Yes I know its not a Tree but Lozza finks de stuf comes outta sum tin innit)
Even that Omid Scabfest creature has found out that he is not a poc but is entirely caucasian so Smarkles will ghost him soon as he loses her credibility.
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