Katie Price #25 and Carl the lackey, love a matching tacky tracky

[Pink Squirrel]

She’s on packed lunch right now. The absolute state of it and she can’t even speak properly, it’s embarrassing. Slurring her words and constantly licking her lips.

She up next talking about making trolls take account for their crimes. She can start with herself and carwash then. Nerve of the cow.

Well done for suffering it for the rest of us

 

[SewerGrapes]

So the Sun just does V3 of Mother’s Day

I can't believe that it was headline news that KP gives H a cuddle -FFS! Either way, it's rather creepy and desperate for news stories. ANY NEWS, however irrelevant...

She really is a piece of shit. And still she gets air time .

'There were LOST of children in the playground.' Yes i'm being pedantic but, like some of you, I'm a writer and spelling inaccuro

She really is a piece of shit. And still she gets air time .

'The playground had LOST of children in it.' Yes, I'm being pedantic but, like some of you, I'm a writer. Spelling errors drive me nuts. Just shows what low level standards the red-tops employ to do write these trashy articles! Main annoyance is LOSE and LOOSE, frequently written incorrectly. eg/ Harvey needs to LOSE weight until his clothes are LOOSE again. Spellcheck won't correct this so it comes down to basic knowledge of grammar. Ok, rant over folks. (I'll get my coat...) x

I don’t think she has thought about it properly, just thinks there are trolls on the internet.

May I ask you fellow Tattlers whether WE could be described as being trolls? None of us make death threats or take the P out of Harvey, just share our opinion of KP and her ongoing dramas. It seems she reads our pages but, isn't it a bit like her nosying in on a private conversation? It's our opinions and eaves-droppers don't always like what they hear/read, and that's tough s#it. Just don't read it!

A big Hi to Ron the Cunt - we find you utterly pathetic by the way and always have a laugh at your expense - which isn't hard.


That's easy - she just has to tell the police the names of her friends - voila! The bloke is probably Ron to be fair.

Yeah ~ you do one, Ron!

What's it with her and serious ailments to her extremities? Her hands will implode next.

...And that 'cancerous finger' was probably genital warts transferred manually lol x

I've just ordered a new bread knife from Amazon. Had to confirm I was over 18 for safety. Then the options for delivery if I were out, one was 'behind the wheely bin'????

Been really ill today, getting sick. Fear my husband laced my Mothers Day Dinner with Novichok to see me off for a younger model!

I wrote a song to play on my acoustic guitar ~ feel free to sing along: 'Novichok, Novichok, nasty nerve agent from the Eastern Blok. Come on then President Putin, cos we will always stick the boot in, oh yeah! Yeah! (goes well with the Postman Pat song tune.) x

 

[Facehugger]

You don't fancy a field full of gambolling Katie Prices then - you could shout mint sauce at them.

I don't know as cunts can gambol in a field, or if the mint sauce would scare them off

 

[Sazbee]

"Goin' to the chapel and we're gonna get married
Goin' to the chapel and we're gonna get married
Gee, I really love you and we're gonna get married
Goin' to the chapel of love"

Pwicey: "No we're not 'Clearblue Cole', were going to Sheesh, it's free and Prep Kitchen are chucking in the canapes".

Clearblue: "What are canapes innit?"

Pwicey: "Who the fuck knows but they're free. Woo Hoo!"

Pwicey then goes off to get ready for the ceremony which is being conducted by Dick Emery the vicar as all 3 of them have Turkey Teef.

White adapted tracksuit is laid out in the bridal suite, well the bogs at Sheesh. No bottoms so Skanky can air her Flaps if she gets nervous.

Fern and the hairdresser turn up.

Fern: "What look do you want you fucker? I was thinking the fucking demure Christopher Biggins as Widow fucking Twanky in panto?"

"Is it free?"

"Yep"

"That'll do"

Hairdresser: "Which wig do you want?"

"The cleanest".

"Bollocks where's the Shake and Vac and Fabreeze?"

Meanwhile the 'bridesmaids' are gathering. Using the term loosely as Pwicey has no female friends so up trips Wee Jimmy Krankie and Madge from Benidorm.

Clearblue is getting jittery with his ushers, Alan Partridge, Richard Madeley and Bernie Clifton and his Ostrich Oswald.

Sid is supposed to be ring bearer but has swollowed the rings in protest at this debarkle, Madley and Partridge are trying to fish them out of his arse with sticks.

In the cordoned off area where the ceremony is being held Amy is being wheeled in in her iron lung.

Clearblue looks resplendent in his matching white tracksuit and Alan and Richard have sucessfully retrieved the rings from Sids arse. Still covered in shit but he doesn't think Pwicey will notice.

Bridal Chorus strikes up and here comes Pwicey in a pink mobility scooter. As she's heading down the aisle she shreaks "Oh fuck, I forgot to invite my kids, never mind, 5 less people to feed".

To be continued - the ceremony and reception...

Amazing You have captured the essence of pointy chin so well in just one sentence.

 

[Mrsjoneswakeupnow]

Thank you I was sure something bad must of happened, they seemed close in the past, what a mess

Sadly I do remember what happened with Gary and Phil.

I think Phil (the one with the beard and dark hair?) especially had had enough of her behaviour prior to the 'split'. They were both there when she got wasted in Ibiza and threated to stab someone.

Anyway, she turned up at their wedding in a wedding dress, completely over the top with tiara as you can imagine, sat in the front row and proceeded to get pissed out of her head.

Then attempted to sing 'A Whole New World' and other unrecognised shite at the wedding breakfast, shreaking over the speeches. Culminated with her collaping on the dancefloor crying and had to be carried out.

I think Gary (the blond make up artist) had a bit of a soft spot for her so she was invited to Phils 50th Birthday party. Again ruined the party, got pissed out of her head and collapsed in a booth. Had to be helped out by Michelle Heaton and Kris.

Think the last straw was when she kicked off at Gary for doing Tamara Ecclestones make- up?

Not seen them together since!

 

[SewerGrapes]

probably not

Eeughh

 

[Monsieur Crumble]

Demure is not a word that applies to either of those idiots!

Manure more like, pair of hideous cretins!

 

[265]

Well that's bloody charming that is! You tell people they're not allowed to suggest thread titles as someone else needs a chance, then bleddy moan when you don't get any suggestions! No pleasing some folk is there................



Well done @Bee kind joking apart, yours is a cracker

I'm and rubbing off on facehugger in more ways than one....

 

[Lucid30]

Latest load of rubbish!

 

[Stapleyourtongue]

A silly one while I catch up xx.
Its a while since I've added angry Turkey Teef Cole ..
Both in Kate's wigs looool xx

View attachment 477042

Can't stop laughing

Loooooool xx.

View attachment 477059

Love it

 

[Hampshire Hog]

The list goes on and on and on .

 

[Pom Bear]

Well your pics always make me laugh - my hubs loves them too. They are just so 'of the moment'. Keep up the good work - we all love them whichever thread they represent.

That's lovely to hear you share them with your husband as well xx.
Thank you very much xx

One for our Pom.

I make that for you to put on later tonight xx

 

[Stapleyourtongue]

Ooh I loves a lace trackie I do <said with about as much sincerity as she takes her vows...>.

And the trainers

 

[Pink Squirrel]

‘Blobby vodka’

right so if she has no home, no car, debts that she doesn’t pay, no residential kids, where is all this money going?

That is a very good question my friend . Ridiculous amounts are wasted on groceries & takeaways. Expense of horses? Buying Itsasham fans/followers?
@Cloud Chaser I do hope the court/solicitors are asking this question also.

 

[liar liar]

Yes that's the one, why make a big deal though, I still believe that's a different pup, many of her fwends have Fwenchies and they all look the same, I follow a lot on Insta and Rottweilers because I'm sad and prefer dogs to people View attachment 475062

It could be any Frenchie as has been said. TBH I though Precious's ears were much larger and flappier than this one who looks older.

Hi everyone,
Brand new on here , I’m also a regular on the Sun comment section and have spoke to many of you on the comment section over the last year . I originally used my name ( stupidly ) then got blocked but came back as Mercedes . I’m absolutely sick to the back teeth of all her lies and fraudulent ways . I have , like a lot on here have done loads of emails and reporting behind the scenes lol . Lovely to be on here .

Welcome - spew your bile freely

Oh crap.. the insurance companies are shit hot on the fraud and I’ve seen someone jailed for something very similar. He’s gonna be really lucky to get away with it.

But he's got a baby on the way - a woman could use that as an excuse - why not him?

 

[Emeline]

Mail Online Videos: Top News & Viral Videos, Clips & Footage | Daily Mail Online

Check out the latest breaking news videos and viral videos covering showbiz, sport, fashion, technology, and more from the Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday.

www.dailymail.co.uk

Video: Katie Price slams Emily Atack for I'm a Celeb STD comments | Daily Mail Online

Katie Price took to her Instagram to slam Emily Atack after the presenter made a dig at her during I'm a Celebrity spinoff Extra Camp in which she implied that Katie had STD's.

www.dailymail.co.uk

How do i get the video up

Its there just press play and skip the ad x

 

[Lucid30]

Ronseal tan, wigs, false nails, toyboys, drugs, holidays and booze etc!

Don’t forget fuel for the car/s, they are always out and about

 

[BigBlue2018]

Don't you love Google translate. This is a German article translated into English. Her previous careers never fail to amuse...View attachment 483305

Hilarious!

 

[Stapleyourtongue]

Mail Online Videos: Top News & Viral Videos, Clips & Footage | Daily Mail Online

Check out the latest breaking news videos and viral videos covering showbiz, sport, fashion, technology, and more from the Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday.

www.dailymail.co.uk

Video: Katie Price slams Emily Atack for I'm a Celeb STD comments | Daily Mail Online

Katie Price took to her Instagram to slam Emily Atack after the presenter made a dig at her during I'm a Celebrity spinoff Extra Camp in which she implied that Katie had STD's.

www.dailymail.co.uk

How do i get the video up

Wtf was she on

 

[BigMavis]

£106 down to £15. Nope.