California is 8 hours behind you. I chat with you all during my work days.
I normally go to bed around 22:30 my time, so 6:30 am for you. That’s why you usually see a “good morning to you” post from me followed by my disappearance for several hours. 
My spinster self is amazed by this.
[/QUOTE]Love you all.
Am here and reading.
Not doing very well. Crash and burn.
Don't worry, am safe.[/USER]
. We are here if you need anything 
God that came quick then?? I want one. I’m jealous. I need to up my breakfast game. I always think I won’t want anything & it comes to my day off and I dooooo.
For you, so you don’t forget where the REAL happiest place on earth is. That last one is where Cole Palmer is made to wait until KO.
All I can say is …men
That was the plan. This is why I am up so early but that gamer set up...
There's no flirting
What's the application process? Will your current boss be part of the selection panel? Do you know who your boss will be?Yeah, he asked me on Friday. Well, really he told me to go for it…
Then there’s been a load of shit going on today, so he was texting as he was at a different site and i was holding everything together, jokingly I said “I’m just trying to impress you” and he replied saying I was doing it.
just so anxious already about it, and know people will hate me managing them. i can be very assertive, which people don’t like, and our current manager is very supportive and maybe too friendly at times. I’m not afraid to tell people they’re wrong, or call people out for deviating from policy, because there’s a patient at the end of it
No matter what, I need to go for it. People with a lot less experience than me are going for it, people I’ve trained…
After being poorly RLF said I could just coast for the rest of life because it wasn’t worth the agro for me, but I feel like I can’t be managed by someone I know Isn’t as good as me at the job.
knowing my luck the job will go out when I’m on holiday and I’ll miss it after spending all this time feeling anxious about it
I did think at one point I hadn’t told you to go to bed, but just didn’t get chance to come online
The dog wash
I mean, it could still be. Let your creative juices flow.
I think Phil is the surprise actually most drunk of the three of them.
I'm planning early, have booked all my nail apts to the end of the year and am outfit planning for all festivitiesDon’t even want to think about Christmas party clothes
YOU GUYS, I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.This is the one just streamed, not sure about the England video
Cute story from him “My parents always said ‘beat them with football’ “ which he definitely does hey
He is so tanned and perfect. OMG. I love him.
. And forgot to share my dessert with you all last night !!! 
I'd expect some evasive answers tbhShe's never asked me fun questions like this
TWO SUGARS?View attachment 1588586
fav animal: domestic would be a cat, I also love elephants, tigers, owls, most birds tbh, ALL ANIMALS wow, dolphins too, chimps.
industry: adult education (that sounds sexual I just mean 16 plus.)
worst thing about job: 5 days in office no wfh offered at all anymore
tea: strong, leave it to brew for a decent while, two sugars and a dash of milk.
piercings: ears x 2, bellybutton, nose.
dinner: chicken curry w boiled rice
this was FUN.
I completely understand what you’re saying, and sometimes it feels like ignorance is bliss I felt that way with my own health but what if all your anxieties over everything are answered?Really don't want to have to take any time off work. The thought of it makes me feel sick. Don't want people knowing, don't want the awkwardness of going back, feeling like everyone thinks/knows I can't cope.
This is going to be some garbled nonsense.
I can say it here, to people who don't know me IRL, all casual like "I have bipolar disorder" because it's a useful shorthand for what I'm like or how you might experience me over time.
But that's a 15-year-old diagnosis and I've spent much of the time in those 15 years alternating between pretending and believing there's nothing wrong. There's a big part of me - even now, sitting here, on my sofa in my pyjamas, wrapped in a blanket, tears streaming down my face that haven't really stopped since I woke up this morning - that thinks I'm OK and this is life and everything is normal and fine and there's nothing wrong with me and there's no help to be had because this is just how people feel sometimes.
I'm scared of being referred and having it confirmed again because I don't want to be ill and I don't want to be someone who has to see a psychiatrist and take medication and have the label and never be able to get away from it. And last time it only made things worse, so it wasn't even like a compromise of acknowledging I'm ill in order to feel better, it was the shitshow of the pain of admitting to needing help and then just feeling worse anyway.
I'm also kind of scared I might get referred and they confirm that part of my brain is right, and I am OK and nothing is wrong. Because that would mean there's literally nothing that anyone could ever do to help.
And most of all, I like to be able to run, and hide, and pretend, and the thought of being "in the system" gives me such anxiety because I don't know how I'd be able to escape if I wanted to. Don't like going into things where I can't see the exits.
Re: sad songs, yes and no. Hard to engage with anything else though. And sometimes there is a feeling of recognition in it. Like not being the only one.
Am very much doubting my ability to go for a walk. Not dressed yet. And even walking round the house I'm doing tiny tired shuffly steps and feel like stopping to lie down at any minute.
Don't want to miss work. Will keep going unless/until it becomes physically impossible.
Family's not an option. Would make everything worse.
Thank you
My problem isn't that my depression is treatment-resistant, it's getting the balance right. Everything that shifts the depression sends me way too far the other way.
Your pup is adorable.
You're all such sweethearts. I'm sorry for the miseryguts thread derail.
Handsome bae will give you thank you kisses.
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