I think you'll find Jack has already answered these criticisms with her usual elan
Jack Monroe #89 Did you know she once ran out of jam?
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I am angry at the abuse of perfectly good dead pig - surely it deserves better
the sycophants won't remember that she's apparently got a freezer full of meals though.
I mean, does she even need to do her 2 shopping trips on Sunday now, given that she's got a freezer brimming with delicious treats??
That was THEN this is NOWI mean, does she even need to do her 2 shopping trips on Sunday now, given that she's got a freezer brimming with delicious treats??
If she has 16 plus 17 EDIBLE (she doesn't) homemade ready meals (didn't happen) then I'm Albus Dumbledore (I'm not)
She really has reached new levels of twattery today ... imagine if someone else pulled a £20 stunt like that (and had £28 change don't forget) she would be screaming into the void like our dear heart @Veronicaaa
Reckon this is some book 8 bullshit thing - #suppernanny, feed your kid for a tenner a week, all the bollocks and eyelids a growing boy needs, blahblahblah!
She's also the only hit for the hashtags #modernbudgetcookery and #TMBCH so she's clearly trying to make those happen. Or maybe book 8 is called 'The Modern Budget Cookery...hhhnnnnnggggffffff'???
(Or summat like Helper).
Twitter has gone on the blink.
The whole freezer conspiracy is more exciting than Bly Manor on Netflix so 
The whole freezer conspiracy is more exciting than Bly Manor on Netflix so
I liked Bly Manor!
Ah not just mine then! I’ve been frantically refreshing!Twitter has gone on the blink.
The Modern Budget Cookery Handbook?
Did anyone just see a post from the famous chocolate bar? I saw it and then it disappeared... are they blocked?
Each episode ends well but that's about it so far for me. THE FREEZER CONSPIRACY IS OFF THE bleeping CHART EXCITING, THOUGH. OMG. LOL.
Like her pov cupboard?
Yeah, what kind of freak would obsess about weight? I mean, those 33 phantom frozen meals only equate to circa 0.0311% of the 13 Cotswold Co. items.
What she’s doing is so so dangerous. By presenting herself as the poster girl for poverty she’s demonstrating that it’s possible to live on nothing and be totally fine and healthy. She’d be far better off acknowledging her privilege and shining a spotlight on those who do struggle to make ends meet and coming up with recipes to make things a little easier for them. She has an actual platform (although maybe not of half a million people) and could really bring attention to the struggles of families in poverty. A single mum working 40 hours a week for minimum wage doesn’t have the time (let alone the energy) to go to the shops twice a day, make a post it wall of meals, cook two diff meals for both her and her son, and make stock that needs to be slow cooked for weeks on end.Thank you for pointing this out as it’s so true, and it’s an apt reminder that she’s not just a sloppy mess or a joke, but an actually clapped demon sent from hell (Mark Lewis u can take my car for that one don’t rly care tbh x). To do all of this ridiculous carry on whilst the tweets @BeautifulTrauma shared about that poor young family now missing a mum for fear of financial insecurity are doing the rounds is seriously abhorrent. It isn’t possible to live on £20 a week, no one should be expected to, and fake newsing that you can feed an adult for 3 weeks with it is shockingly dangerous. I suppose it sells books though and that’s all that matters init - we can’t expect anything better from someone willing to chat tit about a dead child’s family tho can we
It’s time to admit that she doesn’t live that life anymore- if she ever did- and shine a light on the people that do. All she’s doing is minimising poverty and making it seem less of an issue than it is.
What about a series of recipes based on families that have been affected by the pandemic? This is the “insert name here” family. Dad was made redundant and is now working 40+ hours as a Tesco delivery driver on a much reduced wage. Mum is a carer is an old people’s home. 3 kids who are all fussy eaters. Their favourite meals are x y and z so I’ve come up with a recipe they’ll all enjoy, it only costs £1.50 for all the ingredients, 20 mins to prepare and cook, and only uses two pans.
Would probably have to donate some money to the people actually in a tricky financial situation though and that just wouldn’t interest her.
Come to think of it, wasn't it less than a week ago she was grousing to her 250k closest friends about not being able to go and do her £20 slop shop so was instead "going to scrabble around in the freezer to see if I can knock something together" or words to similar effect? Making out like she had half a pack of fish fingers and a few loose peas rolling around in there as opposed to more frozen meals than bleeping Iceland.
Worthy of another Enid Blyton stylee story. In my defence I’m quite pissed.
Thorpe Bay was perfectly quiet and peaceful when the local Asda manager stepped out for a fag break. He needed it, that bloody woman who was always chewing on a child’s necklace had been hanging around the yellow stickered area again, threatening to kick the shins of other customers if they approached the markdowns. He exhaled deeply and gazed into the night sky before gasping in shock. An alarming illumination of weird beige mist filled the horizon.
‘I say’, he exclaimed. ‘That looks rather toxic’.
Down in the posh part of town, Jack was furiously pummelling away at her water rower. The sentient mirror was getting right on her (double D) tits.
‘I did tell you that refreezing bollock sausages was a bad idea, you ignored my smashing idea about bangers and mash’, drawled the pompous mirror, angering Jack as it reflected her angry goblin face at her.
‘Get to duck’, she screamed. ‘Get out of my niche’.
The mirror smirked as Jack stomped downstairs (the bungalow was actually a house, truth be told). Cooper was sniffing around the kitchen, accompanied by an officious looking mouse wearing a waistcoat upon which hung a shiny pocket watch.
‘Good evening madam’, said the mouse, his quick eyes darting back and forth suspiciously as he surveyed the overflowing bin and dodgy electrical arrangements in the crammed kitchen. ‘We are investigating a toxic incident in the area and my team who inhabit your blackberry bush believe you may be responsible’. The mouse lunged at cooper’s nose as he spoke, before quickly regaining his composure.
‘Are you environmental health, you Tory wanker?’ spat Jack. ‘I’m a bestselling author’.
A piercing scream shattered the tense atmosphere. The trio raced upstairs to see the mirror sobbing as it melted into a puddle. The reflection of the toxic haze that had now covered Thorpe bay & was responsible for the demise of the mirror could still be seen in its sad face. Jack reached out.
‘Get back young lady’, barked the mouse. There are no scarves or designer goods within. The mirror has been poisoned by the toxic waste emanating from your kitchen and now covering the town’.
Jack gnashed her teeth. ‘That bleeping pistachio milk, I knew it was a mistake’.
‘No, Ms Monroe’, barked the all-knowing mouse. ‘It was in fact those livers. You have caused an environmental disaster from all that cheap Asda tit you’ve been clogging the drains with. Our suspicions were first aroused when we noted the ocado deliveries & smelt the drains overflowing with curry powdered slop. But this time you have gone too far. Even Dennis Nielsen didn’t clog the drains this badly. My team of woodland creatures have been monitoring your activities and the police will be here any moment to arrest you for crimes against food, the environment and outraging public decency’.
Jack fixed the impudent creature with a sharky glare. ‘I’m entitled to a phone call’, she declared, whipping out three phones from her denim shirt.
‘Hello, mom?...’
She's going to be really annoyed that she can't currently tweet the photos she's taken of the frozen slop.
witness protection program, innit.
speaking of ...
Police find cash hidden between Bolsonaro ally's buttocks
Brazilian senator Chico Rodrigues is caught with notes during a search of his home
www.theguardian.com
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