Jack Monroe #79 Big mistake. Big. HUGE.

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

What was for dinner?!? She’s totally lost interest in the £20 thing... you know why....because no one cares and she gets more interaction with the pity me posts.
I want my daily slop update though.

 

[Scotty1976]

She’s Bill Sykes and a nice plate of food is Nancy.

All we ever eat is gruel ! Please sir I want some more . MORE MORE !

 

[LennyBriscoe]

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Is nothing private with her? Well we know it isn’t, but what about her son? I bet his mates would love to know he falls asleep with his mum - if he wanted to tell them that’s fine but what about his right to privacy?

Sending the Fraus and Herrs big hugs. She really is immensely triggering (more so than the Australian lasagne *shudders*). I did think the other day we were just coasting along with recipes and yellow sticker delights...

 

[Tabitha D]

Monroe-specific: put the phone down. Vow to stop telling lies. Start job hunting.

Clean yer fingernails!

 

[Alansbigplate]

Remember a few days back when she asked people to send her letters telling her how wonderful she is, addressed to her agent’s assistant? She even gleefully anticipated that the assistant would be in for a heavy week, having to deal with this deluge of mail.
Well, I wonder how that went? Cos she’s not mentioned it since.
<tumbleweed gif>

 

[kachoochoo]

So she’s already in bed with the cat but now she’ll get up to sweep the kitchen?

that was THEN (10 mins ago) and this is NOW

Does anyone else keep getting Part Of Me stuck in their head?

 

[SweetTransvestite]

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Posted by @PennyLoafer in April.

But that was THEN.

This dog thing is really upsetting me. It’s all about what a dog can do for her. What about what a dog would need from you, you selfish twit?

Do you really think a dog wants to put up with your unstable thinking/life???

You moan about responsibility yet want more?

what if your landlord gives you notice or something else happens and you need to move house and can’t find another house that accepts dogs?

You are pleading financial instability but want to take on the great financial cost of looking after a dog properly?

some days you can’t walk because of all your ailments, will the dog walk itself?

are you going to call him nasty names when he doesn’t fit in with your life?

in your “headspace”!!!!
I’m sure a dog has no wish to be in yours you self absorbed piece of tit.

now get to absolutely fuckety duck.

Cannot this enough.

Jack, ffs....buy a fugging Tamagotchi you insufferable tosspig & stop fishing for the sads

 

[Bookweevil]

Finish my book

1. Pose in my undercrackers on the nearest sideboard.
2. Spend an hour taking self-timed photos of me striking poses on the theme of ‘simple’.
3. Open a SEVERE bundle of fortune cookies with the sentient mirror to get ideas for my next persona.

 

[Lanie]

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Oh for duck sake I am about the same age and I do my thinking in my head or write it down on a piece of paper.
A she needs to get out, she spends far too much time in the house on her phones.
B she needs to stop wallowing in self pity about all the things she hasn't got and start remembering what she has.
C she needs to find a more secure more sociable job to help her with a and b
D she needs to wise up and grow up and start to work out her life.

 

[Fraggle]

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Don’t get me in trouble m’laud but it appears there is a lot of emotional compensation going on

 

[bazzam]

Darling

The thing that strikes me about her is how her son only relates to her

it’s not ever about her providing love to him it is him filling her voids ?

I still find it very odd that he goes to bed at 7.30pm and will be heading to senior school next year. I wonder if she still does the school run, he is probably old enough to come and go on his own. I know all 10/11 year olds are different have some have safer/shorter routes to school.

What was for dinner?!? She’s totally lost interest in the £20 thing... you know why....because no one cares and she gets more interaction with the pity me posts.
I want my daily slop update though.

I can't wait to see what does with the turkey/dinosoar gristle and tendons.

 

[Geetbo]

Cannot this enough.

Jack, ffs....buy a fugging Tamagotchi you insufferable tosspig & stop fishing for the sads

Could we all please take a moment to appreciate the word tosspig.

 

[HarderFaster]

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An incredibly mild thing to be irritated by in the grand scheme of things, but you just know that Jackie is one of those bellends who neglect their skin and scrub it to death with a scalding flannel but they’ve never had a spot and it always looks perfect. She doesn’t deserve nice skin and hair, and it makes me mad.

Oh, and this is why your skin is apparently flaky and scaly, Jack, because you’re bleeping irritating it with a rough surface nightly and destroying your acid mantle. Stop doing this and you can settle for a £2.50 Aldi’s-own moisturiser like the rest of us poor plebs and save £7.50 for, I dunno, bleeping dog food.

 

[Tabitha D]

WTH, she can barely look after herself. Cats tend to sort themselves out (unless they are sadly like the kitten ) Dogs are so dependent on humans, it’s not going to end well.

That’s true, although cats still need things like regular flea and worming treatment, vaccinations, claw trimming, dental checks, etc. and that’s just maintenance stuff but the vet bills add up. (Plus they can be VERY fussy eaters). There’s not much sign that Cooper gets any of this, and we all know what happened with the kitten.
I wouldn’t trust with ANY animal, personally. She’s just too self-centred.

 

[TriviaNewtonJohn]

I wonder if she was supposed to have something to do with this:

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www.hellmanns.com

 

[chocolate choux]

I still find it very odd that he goes to bed at 7.30pm and will be heading to senior school next year. I wonder if she still does the school run, he is probably old enough to come and go on his own. I know all 10/11 year olds are different have some have safer/shorter routes to school

I don’t believe it. My two year old doesn’t go to bed at 7.30pm...

It’s weird how she infantilises him especially considering she doesn’t seem very maternal so it’s not a case of him always being “her baby”. He’ll be a teenager soon enough so she’ll have to ditch the crap otherwise she’ll come across as unhinged (I know, as if that would stop her!)

 

[colouredlines]

This might be OK as part of a larger meal, with rice and sides. Her recipe doesn't mention that, though.

 

[YenE]

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So why mention it at all on the internet?

 

[Toffee finger]

What did they have for teeeeeeeeeaaaaaa???

This will go in the same way as the freezer chip shop chips. We will never know!

 

[Tabitha D]

This will go in the same way as the freezer chip shop chips. We will never know!

I’d hate to have missed the liver curry!