Jack Monroe #65 Green gages and ham

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Fruitjack

I need to do a grunka so I don’t know if someone has mentioned this but some well
meaning person has asked her on insta what potatoes to use for ‘her’ parmentier potatoes and she has replied ‘any, a potato is a potato’ WHICH IS ABSOLUTE BOLLOCKS. I don’t mind if she says ‘use whatever you have and it’ll taste ok’ but follow up with ‘but you need a floury one or it won’t get crispy, try a Desiree or Maris Piper’ ANSWER THE QUESTIONS..
 
Reactions: 46

Nottonightbabe

I cook a lot and watch/read a lot of foodie shows and books. I've never come across a recipe that asks you to boil mushrooms. There's a reason for that...

Only time I've ever seen boiled mushrooms actually is at those crappy canteens that serve fry ups, where you go along with your tray and they scoop you ladles of things from the hot tray.
 
Reactions: 30

IndigoStar

“Oooft” is another Scottish thing. It’s a polite way of saying “ohshacunt” or “fuckin hell” or some other awesome expletive where most non Scots folk would say “wow”.

e.g oooft, JM’s nails are fuckin manky!
 
Reactions: 24

lilamay

Exactly!

Jack - if you're reading... potatoes for dummies:



Imagine trying to make parmentier potatoes with waxy potatoes

In all seriousness, her terrible advice could very well waste people's time and money, people who may already be struggling and looking to her for help.
 
Reactions: 33

Lanie

Do people actually eat in bed? I get the ocassional breakfast in bed or meal if you're very unwell but just in general.

Learn something new everyday.
 
Reactions: 13

BeingMyrtle

Gotta admit; I follow Sunday Brunch on Insta and would cook and eat EVERYTHING that Simon Rimmer and guests make.... but then Jackie's God-awful slop popping up afterwards sends my appetite running for the hills. Most effective diet ever.
 
Reactions: 13

crystaleyesd

Covered in coriander too, I see (as someone who actually suffers from the devil herb gene, I can spot it a mile off). Poor Jack, her genetic makeup must have simply SWITCHED overnight, as now she professes to hate coriander - or, of course...*insert Novak Nail*
 
Reactions: 34

Pocahontas

Moderator
Veronicaaa said:
Someone's in the comments telling her she's talking pish about the potatoes.
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So, according to Jack, ‘potatoes are potatoes are potatoes’.

By that rationale, a self-indulgent blog post full of inconsistencies is a self-indulgent blog post full of inconsistencies is a self-indulgent blog post full of inconsistencies.

Right, Jack?
 
Reactions: 53

crystaleyesd

Maybe she's doing more poetry - Gertrude Stein's 'A rose is a rose is a rose...'? Honestly, you fraus are just UNCULTURED.
 
Reactions: 19
F

FreeSquirrels

I’ve just read about someone pickling mushrooms then frying them but her food looks really tasty.

Those images last night are so unappealing, different colours & shapes for each dish please!
 
Reactions: 6

Dustye

She was living with another couple throughout her pregnancy and was single. As someone who has been in an abusive same-sex relationship, this is so fucking infuriating.
 
Reactions: 32

Lanie

I would honestly love her food to be judged by a panel of real chefs, too see if her food passes their tests. I don't mean that nastily but out of curiosity. Any chefs I have ever watched all are very compassionate about textures and flavours. They make out food is an experience not to be missed.

Perhaps if they gave her some sage advice she would maybe calm down her cooking and make it more basic. For me it sounds likes she is trying to hard to create cheap "fancy meals" but I don't always think they work as some of the combinations she uses are like chalk and cheese which would create a dish but without the flavour explosion that is expected.

I honestly believe if she trained in a college( not an elite one, just a standard one) she could go places.
 
Reactions: 8

Dustye

Uberrima fides said:
Panda sex? We've had two pandas at Edinburgh Zoo for years now, and not once have those furry friends done the horizontal mambo. Nope, not even when offered extra bamboo and candle lighting as a bribe.
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I hate pandas. Frigid monochrome bastards, taking up all the conservation money and attention.
 
Reactions: 47

Nottonightbabe

She gave that same answer during the Hellmanns thing too didn't she? Must have been during the potato salad segment. Someone asked what potatoes to use and she said it didn't matter, any potatoes
 
Reactions: 15

Captainmouse

Didn’t she tell people to roast tinned potatoes at one point?
 
Reactions: 24
H

Hellybelly

It's clear looking at her posts that she hasn't really got much of a clue about food at all! She got lucky getting 'discovered' a few years ago and managed to cobble together some crap books but she's absolutely no idea about food really. Allegra must have cringed. Jack reminds me of when Adrian Mole works in that restaurant that sells liver and onion slop for mega money to people who were so pretentious they believed it tasted good.
 
Reactions: 31

Nottonightbabe

Lanie said:
I honestly believe if she trained in a college( not an elite one, just a standard one) she could go places.
Click to expand...
She'd never take instruction from anyone though, can you imagine trying to teach her anything. But particularly trying to teach her on her "niche" and "life's work"
 
Reactions: 14
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