Jack Monroe #524 Not the only or most important voice and presence in this critical area of our life

[Seaford Haggington]

No bloody way I'd stay at that guest house.

 

[NobblyBobbly]

A really underrated part of Jack history for me is the pompous letters she used to write to the Southend Echo (which she then posted on her blog as if anyone cared). Rage naaning about traffic wardens or whatever it was. A real window into the boring life of 20 year old (I think?) Jack. Top tier level cringe.

 

[Girty Drifter]

New Frau here, been lurking for some months so bit the bullet and joined. I’m definitely not Jack as I have a job, a conscience and a well-developed sense of shame. And an OH who hasn’t LEFT. And children who live with me.

Only posting as that knife ‘sharpening’ video is absolutely one of my aneurysms and I’m now having to go and rage eat the punnet of strawberries* in my fridge (which is definitely switched on)

*obvious proof right there that I’m not Jack, as if I were, I’d probably top them with tuna and cornflakes then blend them into a slop.

 

[Ellabella]

The way she's moving around a (filthy) domestic kitchen, like she's head chef at a 250 cover restaurant, makes me want to vomit. It's all so performative.

 

[DianeAbbotsMojito]

I would LOVE SB to come on.

If you're reading SB, sign up and tell us what mummy's been up to and I'll post you a vape and a Sega Mega drive or whatever the kids are going wild for these days.

ETA dead at the "craft" business being called Bread and Jam. You stupid cunt, guest. Send crocheted coffinos

 

[Yel]

Is it really a chaos when jack's not involved? Feels like a tedious.

Someone rehashed the wiki, got promoted here so people shared and got the ball rolling with the algorithm. Great - some more people saw the content from the good people here, but there's nothing more noteworthy to say on it.

Vaguebaiting is a rule here for a very good reason, eithet say your tea (or "tea") or stfu is best for everyone. Mods get alot of angst, but the only aim is ever to make the threads run smoothly.

 

[DinosaurSenior]

Comic sans puts the rage in my naan, or brings it out, or something. It's so unnecessary

I used to produce a catalogue for a

Spoiler: Dull Font chat

furniture company every year, and they had a very grumpy Manager who would constantly harass me about deadlines and layouts.

He used to yell... "Come on, time's roamin'!" Over and over again at me, and I just worked faster.

It was only years later I realised what he had been talking about....

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Those crafts. Imagine being that arrogant and delusional. She really does inhabit an alternate reality and the fact she's been given a platform for her "cooking" (which is about as appealing as a grubby, uniorned cross stitch in a fame she found in a skip) makes me want to hurl a chair through a window.

Her earliest blog posts, Echo columns and letters to the editor are still utterly mindblowing to me. She’s such an arrogant, delusional, deeply unpleasant tosser with a nasty tory middle englander mentality that is years and years beyond her actual age. I mean, her dream job at twenty fucking four years old (for which she wasn’t qualified) was Macebearer to the fucking mayoralty FFS

(For the uninitiated amongst us, of which I was one and had to look it up!)

Spoiler: SS of full post

Thanks to @Mel Donte for capturing this “ten thousand fictional justifications why I can’t drive”

 

[emotionalsupportsideboard]

I have no issue with you Molly I think you opened a lot of people's eyes to the grift for which I applaud you.

Same. AM combined with all the Tattle resources helped me join some dots I'd struggled with, due to the sheer amount of duckery Jacko has been part of through the years, as a diagnosed ADHD it was the Wiki and AM summarising things that helped, as my brand of ADHD means I struggle with reading comprehension and putting things together.

 

[nothanksbabes]

While Guest has been on my radar for at least a decade (I wish I was as good at clocking liars in my personal life) and I'm familiar with her recent gifting and fuckery, somehow these screenshots of her indignant comments and letters (that I've never seen before) really show her up for what she is more than anything else... a self-important, mean-spirited mouth on a stick with zero redeeming qualities.

It's crazy, because nobody has to be talented or famous or important to be likeable. Some people light up a room just by existing. She is the opposite.

 

[TbilisiPeach]

There is no great secret about her abandoned TV career is there? She was shit at being on telly. The fact she can't cook wasn't on her side either. Imagine that poor crew trying to make DKL with all the new covid restrictions to deal with. Then they have to deal with a complete noob who has no idea how television works* normally. And doesn't even turn up on the first day, insisting the production is made even more complex by filming part of it in their house. They must have hated her and vowed to never work with her again before the first episode was on air.

* Being a talking head doesn't count. You just sit where you are told and answer questions.

Yes, absolutely!

Anyone waiting for a grand reveal, there won't be one, so make yourself a hot-buttered cup of turmeric tea and just enjoy the ride.

Anyone teasing with tea, we are fully used to broken promises here. #granola #secretveganingredient #blogposts

 

[SendReceive]

Hello Molly. It was obvious matt disliked her intently. He spoke to her as a Disgruntled adult would talk to a child who had pushed them to their last nerve. I imagine thats probably how Babs and the teacher co spoke to her often too. She has no likeable qualities. Shes a hardfaced know it all, who actually knows nothing.

The giveaway for me (apart from “terrible”) was Matt’s brilliantly subtle yet deep burn of “this is all quite unorthodox” (read: “what the everloving f**k are you doing?”) while Guest was making the horse spunk lasagne.

New ninnies can behold the creation of the horse spunk lasagne from 25 minutes in:

 

[YerDa]

Hello ninnies from a newbie Herr/Frau posting on the anniversary of their first grunk. I‘ve been quoted by the canal from time to time when I’ve lost my temper with guest on the hellsite and made my opinions felt. The anti-Jack FMs fuelled by @Awfully Molly have been horrendously counterproductive to the stopping the grift and the frustration with that has driven me to open an account here. You all have made me hoot and fizz, thanks for all you do. Now fuck off x

 

[Geetbo]

Walliams to be fair seems like a proper creep. I’m sure he’s actually a gelatinous space alien from Planet Perv. Everytime I see him on TV I want to back away into the wall

She does tend to choose her enemies wisely I’ll say that for her.
Walliams. Sue Lee. Daubney. Hopkins. Cunts all.

 

[Skyfall]

Can’t believe Captain Tom’s daughter has taken pole Position on the grifter grid from our Jackie gal.

 

[moldwarp]

Watching the DKL episode again leads me to believe that she never had that media training, as she sorely needs it. One of the first things that you are taught is that when being interviewed, or addressed by your co-presenter, when you reply you keep your eyes on them. She can’t stop her eyes wandering back to look straight into the camera. My verdict: terrible.

The worst thing is it's not terrible because she's a newbie or didn't really want to be on telly, all of which would be understandable. She'd been in the game 8 years by then and forced herself into the show. So it comes off as not so much newbie incompetence but just pure entitledness - she thought she was so brilliant she didn't have to prepare. That kind of delusional self confidence is the very epitome of class privilege imho.

 

[VeniVidiVicki]

When she shakes the pan, while SB films her, there is no sizzle
I mean you can hear most things in that video but at no point do you hear a sizzle

What a fuckin looney tune

She can’t make things sizzle without the sound effects team at This Morning helping her out

 

[FourSeasonSoupObsessive]

I hate that skeleton tattoo. Original and hers. Just quite ugly and unpleasant. And why on hers does it look like the woman shat herself?


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I can’t decide if the vibe is “OMG, I was shagging this skellington and halfway through I shat myself” or “OMG I was canoodling with this skellington and my mooncup fell out”

Its just so comprehensively awful. I’m also obsessing over the single low-hanging buttock, the two black under-boob triangles, why the skelly doesn’t have any legs, what the random wobbly lined arc on the left is meant to be…the more you look, the worse it gets! Christ, imagine having that on your arm for all eternity. Imagine waking up next to that. Would that be better or worse than waking up with the realisation that you’ve woken up next to the human chaos it’s attached to?

I have very much enjoyed the Neue Frauen influx, it has brought some badly needed energy back to the jaded ninny collective while we await the next chaos. Now don’t fuck off!

 

[SouthendRealEstate]

Look at this. Mandarin and poppy seed loaf. It looks soooo doughy. She reckons in the write up that her and SB have already polished off half a loaf as soon as it’s cool enough to eat. I can feel the stomach cramps from here. If she’d eaten it. Which, of course, she hadn’t. Ingredients -> Guest agitation -> Oven -> Picture -> Bin.

 

[MancBee]

Excuse me tender one but she’s a BOY.

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Except for when there’s a super cool edgy tshirt to be worn.

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My goodness, she needs to lay off the weight lifting, look at those muscles. I bet she could weight lift the Queen God rest her. She's begining to look like Arnold Schwarzenegge.