Hello, lovely canal.
I'm a heron who, like every egg laid in the history of eggs, has inexplicably been whisked away and ended up thinking 'What the very duck is going on?"
When I discovered, after an ephemeral amount of Very Distressing Poverty, I was able to finally join Tattle I Hooted. I Fizzed. I rubbed my unruly 53% vegan scrotum against a pop-up laundry bin because, as a genuine poor, I have no sideboards.
It's so good to be here, at last.
My hoop has never been so rinsed. It's like a rebirthing. Picture a tape worm emerging valiantly from a frothing mole. Hold that image.
That's me.
Now duck off. x