Jack Monroe #523 Everything she does is pointless busywork that solves nothing

Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.
New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
Hi Frauen, another newbie and longtime lurker/grunker here. My origin story is quite boring so I’ll keep it brief. I’ve always vaguely been aware of guest, followed her on twitter but not engaged much. Was a classic mark and believe all she said but thankfully never donated/subscribed. My suspicions were first raised by the early Covid beg, then HH2 (boiling soap, wtf?! How do solar lights even charge INSIDE?!), followed by a slow drip-feed of questioning squigs appearing in my Twitter feed leading me to Awfully Molly and then here, so glad to be able to join in now. Working my way through the wiki, following the threads…I mean, wow. I’ve been hooked for almost a year and I still have so much to read. Thank(space)you for all you do. And, for me, it’s my-ther, but I’m pretty sure all pronunciations are interchangeable.
 
  • Like
  • Heart
  • Haha
Reactions: 75
She is a bleeping wagon of the highest order and I'm so happy to get that off my chest and into the Tattlesphere.
So cathartic
 
  • Like
  • Haha
  • Heart
Reactions: 40
If I try and call that fecker Monroe a C U N T and it defaults to bleep, I’ll be in the spite orangery eating non-rehydrated trifle in anger

bleeping bleep

eta oh good, it’s just new frauen writing bleep because they don’t do swears!


pps sorry for swearing
ppps sorry mancbee
Uhm, question, why has everyone been writing bleep all this time then? Is everyone super polite on this forum? Hope I haven't offended with my sweariness and c wording up above.
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 28
If I try and call that fecker Monroe a C U N T and it defaults to bleep, I’ll be in the spite orangery eating non-rehydrated trifle in anger

bleeping bleep

eta oh good, it’s just new frauen writing bleep because they don’t do swears!


pps sorry for swearing
ppps sorry mancbee
Yes! Apologies in advance to Mancbee…*

If you read Tattle without being logged in, duck becomes duck, tit becomes tit, bleep becomes bleep, and I think head becomes head 🤣

*for newcomers, we don’t actually have to do this, he loathes swearing himself, but doesn’t really mind it from other people.

~~~
ETA, how this post reads when you’re logged out/not a member.

IMG_4668.jpeg
 
Last edited:
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Wow
Reactions: 68
Aunty Pat who’s not your real auntie she’s your mums friend?
That's her. Aunty Pat double-dated with her ex-husband and your mum and dad. He's been an ex for a while.

Not quite the same as Aunty Joan who's your granny's friend from church and never had children of her own. She used to babysit you when you were 4 and still sends you a tenner for your birthday every year.

Our equivalent of Aunty Joan was known as Nanny [Surname], to everyone. She'd been a children's nurse, a nanny and a house mother in a children's home. I only found out what her actual name was when she died.

I cannot imagine guest ever sending anyone a tenner in a birthday card. If she remembers at all, it would be a horrible home-made card with a photo of a radish on it and some tat she got free with something.
 
  • Like
  • Haha
  • Heart
Reactions: 44
If I try and call that fecker Monroe a C U N T and it defaults to bleep, I’ll be in the spite orangery eating non-rehydrated trifle in anger

bleeping bleep

eta oh good, it’s just new frauen writing bleep because they don’t do swears!
pps sorry for swearing
ppps sorry mancbee
I was going to ask, is it people being polite and typing bleep or is it an autocorrect thing for newcomers?

bleep bleep bleep

No bleeps here 😁
 
  • Haha
  • Like
Reactions: 39
If I try and call that fecker Monroe a C U N T and it defaults to bleep, I’ll be in the spite orangery eating non-rehydrated trifle in anger

bleeping bleep

eta oh good, it’s just new frauen writing bleep because they don’t do swears!


pps sorry for swearing
ppps sorry mancbee
Oh I do swear a lot but I thought that you weren't allowed to, plus I'm aware that mancbee is not keen on swears.
I've also managed to convince myself that mancbee really is Marcus Wareing.
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 44
Yes! Apologies in advance to Mancbee…*

If you read Tattle without being logged in, duck becomes duck, tit becomes tit, bleep becomes bleep, and I think head becomes head 🤣

*for newcomers, we don’t actually have to do this, he loathes swearing himself, but doesn’t really mind it from other people.

ETA, how this post reads when you’re logged out/not a member.

View attachment 2280855
I never knew this, I'm never logged out 😂
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 66
Yes! Apologies in advance to Mancbee…*

If you read Tattle without being logged in, duck becomes duck, tit becomes tit, bleep becomes bleep, and I think head becomes head 🤣

*for newcomers, we don’t actually have to do this, he loathes swearing himself, but doesn’t really mind it from other people.

ETA, how this post reads when you’re logged out/not a member.

View attachment 2280855
Thank you - this has just blown my bleeping mind!
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 28
bleep. Oh!!!! Works for me! bleep also works.

Sorry mancbee, it's in the interest of research.

I wonder if guest will attempt to make a new tattle account?

I would love that!

Hey, for any new ninnies, do check out thread 31. It's glorious!!!
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 44
Welcome to all new tenderstems. It is so good to hear all the origin stories.

Always remember, whenever you're scrutinising her claims, Professor Jimmy Nail's First Law usually applies.
 
  • Like
  • Haha
  • Heart
Reactions: 53
bleep. Oh!!!! Works for me! bleep also works.

Sorry mancbee, it's in the interest of research.

I wonder if guest will attempt to make a new tattle account?

I would love that!

Hey, for any new ninnies, do check out thread 31. It's glorious!!!
Ooh yes and thread 66 of the big fake black eye! 😂
 
  • Like
  • Haha
  • Heart
Reactions: 36
Jack is a bleeping grifter. Just seeing if it still works, I’ve been busy. It’s strawberry season. Still reading though. Sorry Mancbee.
 
  • Like
  • Haha
  • Heart
Reactions: 36
Hello and welcome to all the new people! Love hearing all your stories. It’s so nice to join in after lurking a while.

I feel like we have to be on our best behaviour now, “don’t mention the walruses! Let’s not start counting things in front of the new people. Quick, hide the Tom Jones gif!”
Welcome indeed to everyone new.

Has Tattle opened up to new members again or is everyone ex lurkers?

I feel a bit vulnerable.

I'm pulling out my comic sans pixalations to protect myself.
 
  • Like
  • Haha
  • Heart
Reactions: 39
I love the idea of the “typical Mumsnetters” (not the cool ones who are here of course), reading Tattle, and thinking, “oh they are GHASTLY on that vile forum but at least they never swear!”
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 73
The Black Eye was a sight to behold. That piece of Munchausens Adjacent rather than Proxy? Like in the catchment zone for M. But just a few doors down in fact, probably creating a whole new sub category of it that future research will be needed to explore it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 24
duck a cunting duck. My swears are bleeping b ‘toned down’ for visitors?

Visitors!!:… there are many swears. Don’t let the Instagrammy-BibleBollox-censorship put you off

PS: guest is a bleep
 
  • Haha
  • Like
Reactions: 38
I thought my daughter had an account here and tried to steer the conversation to Tattle codes without giving away that I wanted to join.
She didn't bite and when I realised it was open I was shaking so much trying to type in my details that I kept making mistakes.
If you're here. Get to bed young lady. You've got work in the morning.
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 78
Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.