Jack Monroe #498 Bootlickcook

[Falkor]

Cool story guest

View attachment 2142178

And like duck did she not get paid by the Guardian for that interview. Like duck.

The bath tub one? No, she wouldn't have been paid for that. I have a few journalist clients who write the big celeb interviews you see in the weekend papers and if they/the commissioning editors are not paying the likes of Gwyneth Paltrow and Arnold Schwarzenegger for their interviews, they're sure as hell not paying Jack Monroe.

Oddly enough the one time you might get paid for your time as an interviewee is if you've got something that might make the cover of Take A Break etc. They pay pretty well and the writers will often split a portion of the fee with the subject to ensure a steady stream.of material. Though you'd get more going to the magazine directly rather than someone pitching your story to them.

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

She really amused me this evening with the chess thing,
I do wonder does she have serious memory issues or something or is she just the most brazen witch that she loves taking the pies out of the povs.

 

[I'm not actually here]

OMFG, I've just discovered that if I knock my screen twice with my knuckle, I can save the random photos that display (as per conversation the other day!).... Now to see how many I can save in 1-2minutes (of my cats, obvs!).
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She really amused me this evening with the chess thing,
I do wonder does she have serious memory issues or something or is she just the most brazen witch that she loves taking the pies out of the povs.

The pies. Please don't edit it!!!!
---

She really amused me this evening with the chess thing,
I do wonder does she have serious memory issues or something or is she just the most brazen witch that she loves taking the pies out of the povs.

BIB thread title nomination!!!
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The bath tub one? No, she wouldn't have been paid for that. I have a few journalist clients who write the big celeb interviews you see in the weekend papers and if they/the commissioning editors are not paying the likes of Gwyneth Paltrow and Arnold Schwarzenegger for their interviews, they're sure as hell not paying Jack Monroe.

Oddly enough the one time you might get paid for your time as an interviewee is if you've got something that might make the cover of Take A Break etc. They pay pretty well and the writers will often split a portion of the fee with the subject to ensure a steady stream.of material. Though you'd get more going to the magazine directly rather than someone pitching your story to them.

We pay/I have been paid travel etc. And the odd beer!

 

[Jelly Bean]

The bath tub one? No, she wouldn't have been paid for that. I have a few journalist clients who write the big celeb interviews you see in the weekend papers and if they/the commissioning editors are not paying the likes of Gwyneth Paltrow and Arnold Schwarzenegger for their interviews, they're sure as hell not paying Jack Monroe.

Oddly enough the one time you might get paid for your time as an interviewee is if you've got something that might make the cover of Take A Break etc. They pay pretty well and the writers will often split a portion of the fee with the subject to ensure a steady stream.of material. Though you'd get more going to the magazine directly rather than someone pitching your story to them.

Ah I actually meant her interview with accompanying quiche recipe dear heart - wouldn't she get paid for that as a contributor rather than an interviewee?

 

[Falkor]

Ah I actually meant her interview with accompanying quiche recipe dear heart - wouldn't she get paid for that as a contributor rather than an interviewee?

Sorry, yes, she should have been for that one.

 

[HotesTilaire]

Ok I found some Web Fix Begs, still searching. Also found a lovely Xmas card Marm made for us

credit @Marmalade Atkins and @BeautifulTrauma

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

OMFG, I've just discovered that if I knock my screen twice with my knuckle, I can save the random photos that display (as per conversation the other day!).... Now to see how many I can save in 1-2minutes (of my cats, obvs!).
---

The pies. Please don't edit it!!!!
---

BIB thread title nomination!!!
---

We pay/I have been paid travel etc. And the odd beer!

Hah I would love to go back and edit. My post tenderstem but I just have visions of Jack stealing pies from povvos !

 

[I'm not actually here]

When sleepless, research setting up a bot to grab all her tweets in real time from now on and archive them for posterity.....

The canal has your back... We will archive everything for you, hun, even when you accidentally delete it.

Note: the letter was most likely from the court for yet another CCJ!!
ETA need to squig!

 

[Snotbuster]

Easy to not care about monetizing the blog on the day that sweet, sweet Patreon dosh comes rolling in, eh, guest?

Thank you. She has a WordPress blog. That's the POINT of using a platform like WordPress--it's easy enough that any idiot can use it. Against "couldn't be arsed to bother," not even the gods can prevail.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Did she manage to play chess for the county before the teacher started the abuse, which made her quit chess club? The timeline gets hazy, I forget what she said.

I won’t repost them because I find her longer story utterly implausible and it’s grim (with no TWs as usual), but Jack clearly states in that long, long account that she stopped going to chess club at 9 years old. So if she played for the county it was before that.

I don’t think it plausible she picked it back up and played later either. She was too busy writing prize winning £5 book token poems, “rebelling in a quiet bookish way”, “always being the lead in school plays”, “preferring to shut (herself) away with work and books than go to parties”, spiraling because when she was 11 “everyone” thought she’d get 15 GCSEs and be a Doctor, doing ballet, constantly being served up “vats” of the BEST EVER avgolemono served up by every single member of her immediate and extended family in the South of England, visiting the sun dappled bucolic lemon groves of Plymouth to commune with her “father’s father’s fatherland”, understudying Narrator in Joseph and his Technicolour Dreamcast, working her first job as a chambermaid, (but also her first job in the Wimpy her first job in a restaurant owned by a family friend and her first job in a fish and chip shop) and also in a being expelled from school and not telling anyone, while also leaving school because she didn’t have enough GCSEs, oh and spending hours each day walking the 14 miles round trip to school with her lovely, lovely pot of coronation chicken. She was too BUSY for chess.

Spoiler: Mither

Are we to believe from this that guest did ballet until she was 16-17? From this timeline, she LEFT ballet in 2005.

Hotes, you will notice that out of GREAT RESPECT for you, I have not posted leotard Rose West. You might even say that I LEFT her out of the screenshot, in fact.

 

[I'm not actually here]

Post a selfie and somebody will now be looking at the filters/settings on your camera and phone.

Post a tweet and it can be archived, instantly.

Now, do what is right.

Pause your Patreon.

Refund everything you owe.

And sort yourself out so that teen has a mum to be proud of.

You can do it.
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I won’t repost them because I find her longer story utterly implausible and it’s grim (with no TWs as usual), but Jack clearly states in that long, long account that she stopped going to chess club at 9 years old. So if she played for the county it was before that.

I don’t think it plausible she picked it back up and played later either. She was too busy writing prize winning £5 book token poems, “rebelling in a quiet bookish way”, “always being the lead in school plays”, “preferring to shut (herself) away with work and books than go to parties”, spiraling because when she was 11 “everyone” thought she’d get 15 GCSEs and be a Doctor, doing ballet, constantly being served up “vats” of the BEST EVER avgolemono served up by every single member of her immediate and extended family in the South of England, visiting the sun dappled bucolic lemon groves of Plymouth to commune with her “father’s father’s fatherland”, understudying Narrator in Joseph and his Technicolour Dreamcast, working her first job as a chambermaid, (but also her first job in the Wimpy her first job in a restaurant owned by a family friend and her first job in a fish and chip shop) and also in a being expelled from school and not telling anyone, while also leaving school because she didn’t have enough GCSEs, oh and spending hours each day walking the 14 miles round trip to school with her lovely, lovely pot of coronation chicken. She was too BUSY for chess.

Spoiler: Mither

Are we to believe from this that guest did ballet until she was 16-17? From this timeline, she LEFT ballet in 2005. View attachment 2142318Hotes, you will notice that out of GREAT RESPECT for you, I have not posted leotard Rose West. You might even say that I LEFT her out of the screenshot, in fact.

That is bleeping Forensic!!!

 

[Valiofthedolls]

That is bleeping Forensic!!!

It might be forensic but it is by no means EXHAUSTED exhaustive! From what i recall she also used to bunk off in the park and smoke with boys, hide in the school library from lessons, travel to school by multiple contradictory modes of transportation, and all sorts. Oh, and was a Sunday School teacher of course. Jack’s 120 HOUR WEEKS are a piece of piss compared to her space-time continuum defying teens and early 20s.

The walking 14 miles to and from school with coronation chicken might be my favourite though.

Spoiler: Coronation chicken on chips no less

 

[I'm not actually here]

It might be forensic but it is by no means EXHAUSTED exhaustive! From what i recall she also used to bunk off in the park and smoke with boys, hide in the school library from lessons, travel to school by multiple contradictory modes of transportation, and all sorts. Oh, and was a Sunday School teacher of course. Jack’s 120 HOUR WEEKS are a piece of piss compared to her space-time continuum defying teens and early 20s.

The walking 14 miles to and from school with coronation chicken might be my favourite though.

Spoiler: Coronation chicken on chips no less

View attachment 2142335View attachment 2142336

"Undoubtedly disgusting small-child finger."

She has never grown out of it, has she? Preemie hands n all that.

I feel there is a scalpel missing from your forensic detail?!

I believe everybody deserves a chance in life but ffs, she needs to grow up fast. She is 35 years old!!! Not 15.
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... Jack’s 120 HOUR WEEKS are a piece of piss compared to her space-time continuum defying teens and early 20s.

I made a cuppa. It was a mistake. It is now all over my pillow!!
---

I won’t repost them because I find her longer story utterly implausible and it’s grim (with no TWs as usual), but Jack clearly states in that long, long account that she stopped going to chess club at 9 years old. So if she played for the county it was before that.

I don’t think it plausible she picked it back up and played later either. She was too busy writing prize winning £5 book token poems, “rebelling in a quiet bookish way”, “always being the lead in school plays”, “preferring to shut (herself) away with work and books than go to parties”, spiraling because when she was 11 “everyone” thought she’d get 15 GCSEs and be a Doctor, doing ballet, constantly being served up “vats” of the BEST EVER avgolemono served up by every single member of her immediate and extended family in the South of England, visiting the sun dappled bucolic lemon groves of Plymouth to commune with her “father’s father’s fatherland”, understudying Narrator in Joseph and his Technicolour Dreamcast, working her first job as a chambermaid, (but also her first job in the Wimpy her first job in a restaurant owned by a family friend and her first job in a fish and chip shop) and also in a being expelled from school and not telling anyone, while also leaving school because she didn’t have enough GCSEs, oh and spending hours each day walking the 14 miles round trip to school with her lovely, lovely pot of coronation chicken. She was too BUSY for chess.

Spoiler: Mither

Are we to believe from this that guest did ballet until she was 16-17? From this timeline, she LEFT ballet in 2005. View attachment 2142318Hotes, you will notice that out of GREAT RESPECT for you, I have not posted leotard Rose West. You might even say that I LEFT her out of the screenshot, in fact.

I just keep clicking on the spoiler in the 2nd para. Where is @FunnyFuneral when you need them?!!! I know it is late/early but do you want us all to stop breathing?!!! Chapeau. Truly.

 

[MaineCoonMama]

By my rough calculations (and a wee google) it would take a person of average fitness over two hours to walk 14 miles/22 kms. She walked over 4 hours a day?
Insert Jimmy Nail etc.
14 miles my shiny metal a.

 

[I'm not actually here]

By my rough calculations (and a wee google) it would take a person of average fitness over two hours to walk 14 miles/22 kms. She walked over 4 hours a day?
Insert Jimmy Nail etc.
14 miles my shiny metal a.

I do feel that Jimmy should/ must have been at the top of the charts for *many* weeks now, courtesy of guest. He must be knackered with all these demands for his song!
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By my rough calculations (and a wee google) it would take a person of average fitness over two hours to walk 14 miles/22 kms. She walked over 4 hours a day?
Insert Jimmy Nail etc.
14 miles my shiny metal a.

Mcm, what's the green alien aura on your avatar?!!!
---

By my rough calculations (and a wee google) it would take a person of average fitness over two hours to walk 14 miles/22 kms. She walked over 4 hours a day?
Insert Jimmy Nail etc.
14 miles my shiny metal a.

Did the search engine add in the humiliating traaaaazers? Might have aided /abetted?!

 

[MaineCoonMama]

I do feel that Jimmy should/ must have been at the top of the charts for *many* weeks now, courtesy of guest. He must be knackered with all these demands for his song!
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Mcm, what's the green alien aura on your avatar?!!!
---

Did the search engine add in the humiliating traaaaazers? Might have aided /abetted?!

The green frog bonnet? It's from one of Marm's gorgeous grids of Jackie, I think? I've had it for so long I've forgotten exactly where it came from.
No humiliating traaazers were harmed during the calculations.

 

[Seaford Haggington]

Adding this in reply to Dr Squig:
View attachment 2142158

She created a money saving recipe that is so badly written it wastes food. But she didn't get paid, so it is all just a laugh.

What a vile person.

 

[Cookiecookie]

View attachment 2142044

She really is a vile parent isn’t she? I remember my dad being proud as punch when I eventually got good enough to beat him at chess. With her, it’s the opposite.

Geez. You might say that kind of thing as a joke with your kids, but with Jack, you just know it's not.

Daughter and I tease each other (and my mum) about height, but I'm honestly happy she's ended up tall. You know the day SB finally grows taller than 5'1.7", if he hasn't already, she'll have a strop rather than be pleased

 

[houseofhoop]

View attachment 2142032
Ah, the return of chess Jack.

Sorry, she ‘played for the country’?? nah I’m sure it was regional when she blogged about it before

 

[alphaspagbol]

Sorry, she ‘played for the country’?? nah I’m sure it was regional when she blogged about it before

Yeah. It does say county not country.