Jack Monroe #463 Is she on the game for Farrow & Ball?

[PummelMyPumble]

An ongoing vesuvius of self-important drivel

Thread title nomination!

 

[camotea]

Yep. About dildoes and some crap about being able to write them off as a source of warmth/heat, or some equally tenuously shoehorned in shite. Much like the time she implied in her cookbook that as it’s vaguely cock-shaped, everyone could shove a courgette(?!) up their flue, but that as she’s a “nice girl” she’s not going to suggest that, but provide a courgette recipe instead.

In so, so many ways she’s perpetually stuck in some sort of arrested development as a not particularly mature adolescent. It’s pathetic-and embarrassing.

Bit gauche, darling

 

[ForgettyBetty]

Can't be that big a job seeing you were broke Jack ...12x bills and 52 x 20 at Asda
Oh and the cash out every Friday ....

 

[Birditer29]

This is a great example of her rewriting her own timeline. Here's the origin story from her publisher's website (clearly right wing trolls) I think it's also what is written in the book but can't confirm...https://www.panmacmillan.com/blogs/lifestyle-wellbeing/jack-monroe's-tin-can-recipe-anellini-con-cacio-e

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What the duck is soft spaghetti? As opposed to just, er, spaghetti

 

[Veronicaaa]

What the duck is soft spaghetti? As opposed to just, er, spaghetti

Soft spaghetti is the opposite of what she did with the LINGREENIE with chicken.

 

[Birditer29]

Spoiler: Accountant

View attachment 1889202

She’s kniwn him since before primary school?!

 

[MavisBeacon]

She’s kniwn him since before primary school?!

#1978Truther

 

[imBUSY]

Oh, Vlad, you kidder.

 

[GigglePops]

I wonder if one of the 'rollercoaster of new meds' was the Tramadol? (Seriously, who taught her to write?)
Note the breadcrumbing about health with a very obvious implication given the picture, needing time off, weekly appointments (!) etc.
'It's a hard look at my own behaviour'....well, we know this never happened, don't we dear?

Spoiler: More unfulfilled promises

 

[itsnotmereally]

In so, so many ways she’s perpetually stuck in some sort of arrested development as a not particularly mature adolescent. It’s pathetic-and embarrassing.

another narcissistic ‘quality’.

 

[FlirtyThirty]

I wonder if one of the 'rollercoaster of new meds' was the Tramadol? (Seriously, who taught her to write?)
Note the breadcrumbing about health with a very obvious implication given the picture, needing time off, weekly appointments (!) etc.
'It's a hard look at my own behaviour'....well, we know this never happened, don't we dear?

Spoiler: More unfulfilled promises

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“A deliberately striking photograph” mmm.

 

[Whaa?]

didn’t she say the rinsed hoops was borne out of someone who contacted her saying they always had spaghetti hoops leftover from their foodbank parcel and she was trying to do something imaginative with them?

At one point it was a specific brief she had been given by a food bank. This is the most 007 it ever got, iirc.

 

[Fitnessqueen]

Spoiler: les mills rpm

Glen is the man. Get yourself onto #94- They have old skool toons on that one like Coolio.

OT. Many online banking apps can filter your spending by type*. She’s such a bleeping tool.

*admittedly Santander won’t know my Savers spending is all Pepsi and not zoflora but you get the drift.

Spoiler: Les Mills shiz

I wish Glen would pick some old skool stuff for Pump instead of obscure rap and trap songs!

 

[Froggies]

ATTENTION PLEASE


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Thread title nommmmm: Jack retweeting as too many people were leaving her alone

 

[Foxvint]

I'm reading in a hidden tab at work and I just had to try and suppress a laughter induced coughing fit so thanks for that pal

Her male followers are a weird weird bunch. They probably identify as feminists and are all performative supporters of women but there's an element of the incel in the vast majority of them. Creepily vying for attention from a person who gets engaged to women is just deranged (I know occasionally she'll throw them a bone of hope saying ages been looking at men in scrubs on Tinder, she needs to keep them interested after all) They are the sort of men that inhabit women's only spaces because they're "allies" and feel they have a right to be there because they're not like other less cerebral men. They are respectful. But creepily harrass known lesbians on Twitter.

All of this but to be fair to them she's breadcrumbed more cock than Bernard Matthews so they would have a bit of hope

 

[CakedCat]

All of this but to be fair to them she's breadcrumbed more cock than Bernard Matthews so they would have a bit of hope

You know what to do in a few pages time.

 

[Hold my beans]

I wonder if one of the 'rollercoaster of new meds' was the Tramadol? (Seriously, who taught her to write?)
Note the breadcrumbing about health with a very obvious implication given the picture, needing time off, weekly appointments (!) etc.
'It's a hard look at my own behaviour'....well, we know this never happened, don't we dear?

Spoiler: More unfulfilled promises

View attachment 1889323

Is she emulating Sinead O'Connor here?

 

[moldwarp]

I wonder if one of the 'rollercoaster of new meds' was the Tramadol? (Seriously, who taught her to write?)
Note the breadcrumbing about health with a very obvious implication given the picture, needing time off, weekly appointments (!) etc.
'It's a hard look at my own behaviour'....well, we know this never happened, don't we dear?

Spoiler: More unfulfilled promises

View attachment 1889323

I have often wondered about how she came by her, er, distinctive writing style. I think she’s read a lot of misery lit, especially the late 90s stuff like Elizabeth Wurtzel and Marya Hornbacher. You know, middle class white chick recounts in highly dramatised prose how she nearly died fromdepression/addiction/ED etc

Then I’m also getting some top notes of Sylvia Plath (of course) and an undertone of jolly hockey sticks schoolgirl stories (I bet Mallory Towers was her first literary love).

occasional aroma of Marian Keyes and even a teensy bit of Martina Cole when she’s getting lairy on the haunted bird app.

All pasted over with a patina of that good ol’ literary liar and alleged sexist bully, James Frey.

the best thing is that it’s really easy to parody her style (it’s already parodic let’s face it) which is just one reason why these threads are so fucken funny

 

[GigglePops]

I wonder if one of the 'rollercoaster of new meds' was the Tramadol? (Seriously, who taught her to write?)
Note the breadcrumbing about health with a very obvious implication given the picture, needing time off, weekly appointments (!) etc.
'It's a hard look at my own behaviour'....well, we know this never happened, don't we dear?

Spoiler: More unfulfilled promises

View attachment 1889323

The comments get to the heart of Jack's method of cooking without knowing it

 

[FlirtyThirty]

I have often wondered about how she came by her, er, distinctive writing style. I think she’s read a lot of misery lit, especially the late 90s stuff like Elizabeth Wurtzel and Marya Hornbacher. You know, middle class white chick recounts in highly dramatised prose how she nearly died fromdepression/addiction/ED etc

Then I’m also getting some top notes of Sylvia Plath (of course) and an undertone of jolly hockey sticks schoolgirl stories (I bet Mallory Towers was her first literary love).

occasional aroma of Marian Keyes and even a teensy bit of Martina Cole when she’s getting lairy on the haunted bird app.

All pasted over with a patina of that good ol’ literary liar and alleged sexist bully, James Frey.

the best thing is that it’s really easy to parody her style (it’s already parodic let’s face it) which is just one reason why these threads are so fucken funny

I absolutely HATED Prozac Nation. Set me right up for seeing through munchie babies like Jack though.