Jack Monroe #462 Tectonic plates make less fuss about moving

[Belgian Bun]

I love the idea that full-time work includes sleeping in until 2pm when you are supposed to be in London. If I tried that malarkey I'd be sacked.

 

[FlirtyThirty]

It is weird how she has zero actual real friends on twitter expect spanners. (Wonky doesn’t count) Does she filter people? Does she have a fake Southend name now? Or….do they just not exist….

 

[elepal]

Why are other people buying her paint?

They're not. Ask Jimmy Nail.

 

[Dogmuck]

Two decades of work, her arm must be fkd with 20 years of tin rattling - absolute bell end

 

[Slop n slide]

I’m sorry but is she suggesting she invented colour-coded bookshelves. I just cannot with this absolute joker of a human .

 

[Elsie Ben Felyn]

Why can’t she admit to buying anything other than sideboards?

Everything is found, gifted or traded.

I’d say she was lucky if it wasn’t all bollocks.

 

[Django]

Jack must have forgotten that she was only posting about Farrow and Ball in order to wind up the trolls. So why is she complaining that it's winding up the trolls

We've been telt, ey?
I've been busy with my low paid part time job but trying to catch up with some TV earlier and watched Celebrity Mastermind today. A fabulous autistic comedian called Ria Lina won and I was thinking about Jack and her lack of TV exposure despite her squillions of attempts to make it into mainstream. She's never been on a panel quiz or game show but I can imagine Jack spending hours and hours refining her Desert Island Discs choices in a moleskin notebook.
I'm just guessing here but I think Jack's subject matter on Mastermind would be Me!
Younger ninnies may have better ideas but here are my guesses for her tracks whilst honking on about herself with Lauren:-
* Me, Myself and I
* Songs About Me
* Free To Be Me
* Me! (soz @BeautifulTrauma )
* I Love Me
* It's My Life
* This Is Me
* My Way

 

[Potatoes O’Houlihan]

Getting the definite impression that she's a leeetle bit vex lately.
hahaha

 

[DianeAbbotsMojito]

I thought I was up to date, but I’ve obviously missed something major and I can’t find anything about it - where have Molly’s tweets gone?!

Someone is threatening to doxx her and take her to court

Quite what a court will make of a claim brought by someone doxxing said person remains unclear.

 

[Emmapism]

Might ask Jack how I can get constant free stuff from my friends. Is it the tweeting about being poor that does it? Or should I continually imply I'm smol and fragile? What's a good illness to invent to obtain some made to measure curtains?

She should write a book.....

No, not that one.

 

[House of Carbonara]

I think it's going to be a garden flat with french doors hence "floor to ceiling windows"

Eta I once rented a dreadful, cold, sparking-leccy dodgy landlord flat which was part of a huge early Victorian house. My "bedroom" had the most beautiful arched double doors to the garden though!

You've just described a flat I used to rent yonks ago, dear heart!

 

[Day3TShirt]

I hate them. They act like they invented veganism, they have had to apologise at least once for ripping off other recipes, and I saw one of them in real life once at a time when face masks were compulsory and he didn’t have one on in a tiny little shop giving it the big I am.

Oh! I don’t feel so bad bashing the book now.

 

[Captainmouse]

I concur wholeheartedly...

But I'd add to the top section "buying unsuitable acquiring any pets"

FTFY

 

[Brian Butterfield]

 

[NellieBoo]

Can Jack actually leave her bungamansion? Because surely she can't be so spiteful and full of absolute bare faced lying shite in real life?! She'd be shouted and chased down the street round our way .

 

[Yer_wha?!]

I love the idea that full-time work includes sleeping in until 2pm when you are supposed to be in London. If I tried that malarkey I'd be sacked.

Jack's version of flexi time working.

 

[Mrs Peel]

Someone is threatening to doxx her and take her to court

Quite what a court will make of a claim brought by someone doxxing said person remains unclear.

I don't think we know this for sure. It could just be a glitch.

 

[Penelope_Ghent]

Jack has been working full time since she was 14? I wish I had Jack’s full time job. Sleeping until god knows what time, dicking about on twitter, writing manuals of sloppage and basically being an absolutely bone idle mare.

 

[GigglePops]

Watching a show on Channel 5 about Keeping Up Appearances. Jack is Hyacinth Bucket isn't she? Absolutely delusional and completely unaware that people are laughing at her, don't want to spend time with her because she's PAINFUL to be around, can see right through her horseshit and she always ends up on her arse in a pond no matter what she tries to do. She thinks she's somebody she's not, just like Hyacinth, and it's hilarious.

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

Will shag 4 paint….

surely removals company is going to be pricy or is that free too?