Jack Monroe #446 Egg rings in America WO-AH

[Witchfinder Sargeant]

Yep. In fact she'd probably be dead going from 200(?) units a week to 0 in 7 days.

When I stopped, I was drinking a bottle of wine a night. I contacted the NHS for advice and was told that I would probably be OK but if I experienced any symptoms such as tremor, hallucinations, and other cheery things I was to go to hospital immediately. You would need medical supervision to stop from the amount she was drinking.

 

[margaretta]

I only drop in this thread for time to time but wanted to thank you all for the documentation and laughs in thread #444 - that was really some meltdown.

I cannot believe her publishers passed grifty kitchen as fit for publication. It looks terrible and the recipes are disgusting.
Courgette soda bread?
No tell me how to make an economy chicken tikka, lasagne, everyday food I can feed the kids and keep them filled with nutrients.

As for the tin opener hack and other dangerous activities… as so many have said 60p tin opener. But I don’t know about your house, i have 4 tin openers. If a neighbour came to borrow one, I would gift it to them.

The tea towel hack from old clothes. Most supermarkets have £1 or less options. And its not like you need to buy one every shop… tea towels last for ages.

I hope this book really is the end of her poverty grifting.

 

[shugabug23]

My dearest dear hearted tenderstem asshat ninnies…

May I thank(space)y’all you for your intelligent, FORENSIC, thought provoking and most importantly funny as fuck threads this year.
Being able to drop a comment

Spoiler: TW

about having a bad black dog day

is never met with accusations or even a need for a reply. A simple emoji reaction and then the next post has someone superimposing Monroe’s head onto Timmy’s Mallet… well that’s just a normal day in the canal and the only way we roll!

TOOT TOOT to 2023 fraus & heren And to Jack, I care for you yet despise you in equal measure. But I wish you well because your shit show of a life has brought me here & for tattle I am thankful. May your New Year be filled with truth, transparency, love, continued sobriety & good mental health and Imodium because after the look of them raw sausage roll insides, if you ate 10, you’re facked in the morning pal x

 

[kachoochoo]

happy second anniversary of me sending jack's to do list to my dad everyone!

updated list here for the new year!

Spoiler: Jack's Coming Soons

£15 a week lunches
£20 shops as a whole
3 recipes per week in 2022
9 half-written manuscripts
15 minute meals
24 tweet thread of proving the trolls wrong
35 recipes from a £20 shop, pick your fave
2000 words for print glossy GQ awards
a few announcements
adding to twitter thread of plants as they bloom
advent calendar
aged chicken thigh bone stock
alcohol free versions of recipes
another walk in a restricted mod area
apple and pear crumble with brown sugar
austerity book
base system going in next book
BBC show guest on dr rupy's iplayer show
best value vegetables for squig
big press photo shoots
big work
black bean brownies recipe
black bean recipes from poll
black pudding pastitsio
BLM video monetization donation
blog a simple recipe
blog about energy companies' profits and nationalising stuff
blog of heatwave foods
blog post excited about for ages
bollocking rishi sunak
book on culinary history
book signing in Belfast
books for slow cooker appeal

books for the rural coffee caravan confirmed never arrived 17.2.22 by rcc twitter

Brand New System for desk - wallpaper
bright blue think tank updates
brioche balls
brioche, mincemeat and camembert wreath
broccoli, creamy cannellini beans and fish
broccoli breakfast pasta
budget shopping article
Camp Kitchen from the shed
cannelini bacon and pork belly pie
carrot cake baked oats
chestnut fudge thing
chicken livers
chicken nuggets with black pudding crumb
chocolate and prune oats
Christmas condiment
Christmas leftovers caesar salad - nov 2022
Christmas pie and mash - due 3.1.23
cinnamon granola recipe
coconut oil etc mouthwash quantities
coffee scrub
column for the Breakdown
comic filter security
comparison of 2021 £20 shop to 2022 £20 shop
compiling list of independent food banks
Conditions of Bungalow Bubbling lessons
cooking for one book
cost of living crisis recipes in one category
crispy fish recipe
curating regular book recommendations
David Walliams book reviews
dauphinoise pie
dealing with paying taxes
deep pinky purple mascarpone ice cream
denim shirt embroidery commissions
depressipes
detailed blog on nutrition
devilled eggs recipe - completed it, mate
diabetic recipes
dig out microwave and kettle recipes
DM to Yel
drawing nigella's garden
dyeing all clothes black
easy care for cutlery
email household management book to agent
ethical on a budget
explain daily usage of pythagoras theorem something to do with rishi sunak
festive pop tarts
festive vegan loaf peeling pie
filing accounts
flannel blog
flapjack recipe
folding fitted sheets in seconds
food truck of joy
fulfilling all patreon commitments 2022 edition
gailymail
giant caramelised banana and chocolate pancake
goat kleftiko
gold rush xmas presents
great resources by trans + non binary writers
greek cook book
greens, eggs and ham
half-written budget xmas recipes
handing over her platform to poc
haybox and thermos cooking
healthy on a bootstrap
hecking big decluttering
helping disability and mental health writers
history of York road market
homemade hand sanitiser
homemade cleaning items
homemade dog biscuits
huge depop or Ebay sale
human dreamies
hummus price increase reason
hybrid cassoulet
ideas for pumpkin flesh
inbox zero by bedtime every day
intermittent fasting anger essay
jackfruit version of something
James Bond conspiracy theory
jubilee trifle recipes
kidney bean, black bean and coconut soup
Klingon gagh recipe
knit blanket
kolokythokeftedes recipe
kombucha whisky
leftover cranberry sauce recipe
lemon curd and mixed berry porridge
lever arch files of fan mail
life hacks book
line by line spring budget takedown
links to small businesses
list of slow cooker recipes
lockdown larder 2.0 resumption threatened
lockdown list of services
make turnips not taste like turnips
maple syrup story
mashed potato secret
meal planners on website
militant boiled eggs
mince pie doughnuts
mincemeat recipe
mole
monopoly for charity with martin lewis
more cabbage
more to say on british social attitudes
moving house
mushroom drying completed 2018
mushroom butter
New Thing
newspaper campaign the fucking express
no- and low-fuel cooking (kinda) the bromelain in canned pineapple is denatured
no waste cook book (on twitter for world earth day)
nutrition degree
onion chopping song
open the space squig box
Other Plans for cabbage
ouchy mouth recipes
painstakingly costed menu for week under £20
pastry recipe
patreon update
peasants pudding recipe
photos of Rather Renegade xmas dinner 2022
picture of tree postcards
pistachio milk
pointing out real plants
pork and lentil bolognese
postcards, postcards, postcards
poverty memoir
puttanesca soup
quick pickling
radish recipes
recipe roundup on Instagram
recipes for small people
red ephemera soup recipe
redoing dinner to get better light
report for work and pensions committee
repotting spider plants from a friend
reshooting beach pottery in daylight
rooting out Amazon from website

running around in heels with a Tall Man GQ awards 2020. no evidence of running or dancing, but Marcus is tall. she didn't even personally hand him the award.

running order for xmas dinner
salt and vinegar sardines and spaghetti
sardine tin print
sausage and kale slop
Secret Ingredient - possibly banana skin
secret stock ingredient potato water
selling books on website again
send squig mandarin carrot recipe
sending maple syrup tin to fan
serious work
serving libel papers to fox/daubney/anderson
set up mastodon
setting her teenage musings to music
sexy kitchen makeover reason
shopping trolley viewed Sept 2021, unclear if gift
sideboard photos reason
sleep hygiene routine
slow cooker bubble bath
slow cooker recipes, maybe for depher
slow cooker xmas dinner - before xmas 2021
some kind of timetable for SB in lockdown
something about how money buys time
something else Jack'll remember sometime
soup for bed recipe
spite recipe
split peas and cooking bacon
squigs pick eyeshadow looks

super secret shopping trip hack thrifty kitchen pub january 2023 - quarterhack

supper nanny
support cabal for bullied media types
swamp thing
sweet and sour soup
sweet potato caramel
t shirts with offensive slogan actually done within 3 hours 1.2.22
t shirt profits to trussell trust updates
teemill profits
thread about moving house
thrifty shades of beige
Thursday thunder clap
tiktok
tin juice cordial recipe
tomato soup water content - done
train video for squig
transcribing and blogging non binary talk
transcribing government bollocking
translation of a Greek Cypriot cookbook
unorthodox cheese sauce - done
unorthodox courgette squishing
Up To Something
uses for juice from del monte tins
various cornflakes chicken recipes
vegan char sui buns
vegan cheese list

vegan crackling deep-fried rice paper apparently, admitted April 2022. this was among the original items on this list, first posited in late 2019, preceding these threads

vegan diabetic creme egg (maybe)
vegan haggis
vegan pastitsio in collab with Linda
vegan paella with artichokes
vegan pie glaze
vegan version of upside down pineapple chicken
Vimes Boots Price Index - due mid February 2022
visit Poland
weekly routine
write about diva pdf experience
write about sobriety
writing a thing about tories and 30p meals
zero waste curry falafels

 

[Foxvint]

Lol at her tale of woe there being met with Jobsworth 'taking pebbles is illegal' Squig.

Her audience always seem like petty little brown noses, the type who follow the big boss round laughing too loudly at every joke. They've all definitely got a 'Maureens chair, do not touch, this has been adjusted for me by Occupational Health' sign on the back of theirs at the office.

 

[Hold my beans]

This is typical stan mentality, they don't want to be wrong about Saint Jack

 

[Lucky Escape]

"Since then, she has appeared on the BBC Breakfast sofa to talk about her experience. A nutritionist on the show told her that the portion sizes were too small."

So why do all her performative shopping lists and meal plans only account for 3 meals a day, not 4 (or 8)?

I'm appalled that experts have been pointing out these problems for so long, yet her media enablers still continue to ignore it.

 

[Winthropp Tuesday]

For me the lack of any denial or acknowledgement speaks volumes. Normally she's like a lawyered up Microsoft paperclip, yet on this all we get is a fucked up nose and roars of silence.

“It looks like you’re making a libellous comment about me. Would you like to receive a letter from my Jewish lawyer, pal?”

 

[Shimmering]

Well Borbora, Pete and Jenny, WHO IS HAVING THE LAST LAUGH NOW????? I would like to thank both @Shimmering and @itsnotmereally for their deliciously perpendicular work behind the scenes in bringing this thread title to the canal. Special thanks also to Dorothy from Tennessee for her pioneering egg ring work, without her one of the more amusing snippets of Thrifty Kitchen may never have been written. Finally thanks once again to to the dear @Archduchess of Luxembourg for randomly throwing Kim Wilde into the mix- you are an inspiration. Egg rings in America WO-AH.

Who knows, @jenny2603 , this could be the thread title that finally gets us our forever home.

Everything I do, I do it for you.

 

[RamblerOfLandandMouth]

I firmly believe they would have accommodated a staggered return to full time work and given her only day shifts in the meantime.
But she was, by her own admission, unreliable, calling in with frequent "migraines".

View attachment 1842540
(Source: The Scotsman.
Note: I have sympathy for anybody who wakes up and genuinely cannot face the day at work. I have honestly been there. Broke down crying in the driveway and all. But: 1) if you lie to your employer what the hell are they supposed to do? 2) maybe, if the option is there, you need to try and sort yourself out. For your sake and your child's.
TLDR: keep chucking sickies, you could get chucked.)

Grunking from the past so not sure if it's been said but this is utter bull....I had a friend who worked with her, never liked her because her exit story was lies and according to her she was off with stress for months before it was finally resolved and she resigned so

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I mean, Jack thinks putting your child in a creche is akin to having them fostered. I'm sure she said this.

She did.

I didn’t link to the source last time I posted it, sorry. It’s here, from November 2013.

https://www.standard.co.uk/lifestyl...-class-recipe-for-kale-pesto-8932248.html?amp

 

[Archduchess of Luxembourg]

This is the best day of my life.

 

[jenny2603]

Well Borbora, Pete and Jenny, WHO IS HAVING THE LAST LAUGH NOW????? I would like to thank both @Shimmering and @itsnotmereally for their deliciously perpendicular work behind the scenes in bringing this thread title to the canal. Special thanks also to Dorothy from Tennessee for her pioneering egg ring work, without her one of the more amusing snippets of Thrifty Kitchen may never have been written. Finally thanks once again to to the dear @Archduchess of Luxembourg for randomly throwing Kim Wilde into the mix- you are an inspiration. Egg rings in America WO-AH.

 

[Captainmouse]

Ninnies, ninnies, no idea where this will land, but I had to share

 

[jenny2603]

She did.
View attachment 1840948

I didn’t link to the source last time I posted it, sorry. It’s here, from November 2013.

https://www.standard.co.uk/lifestyl...-class-recipe-for-kale-pesto-8932248.html?amp

Sorry lads I'm going full 1928 truther here. She's like those old bats you used to get in the 80s who'd turn up on some godforsaken chat show sofa going on about how how selfish women who went out to work were. Paula Yates who was most certainly not an old bat used to enjoy sticking the boot into women who had the effrontery not to marry millionaires and couldn't afford to stay home with their kids as well.

Jack should really have been challenged on this. Is the care system really full of children who spent all day in nursery or do those kids have slightly more complex stuff going on with their families? She really is a howling moron.

 

[Hollaaa]

Thread title from Jenny Nums via an assist from the Archduchess. Something from Viv's (actual RIP) wardrobe for each of you.

In the last thread we got a preview of Jack's new book and it's jam-packed with truly Byronic content.

Read the Wiki, new fraus. Could this be the last thread of 2022? Thread title nominations after p30-ish and no swears.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I missed this the first time I had a good trawl through her Guardian comments. It’s from 2013.

Add what form of contraception she used to the list of “things I know about Jack Monroe (because she’s told me) that I don’t know about any other “food professional”

Even her very earliest Guardian comments read like her tweets almost ten years later. Fame didn’t turn her into an insufferable prick, it just inflicted her insufferable prick-ness on a wider range of unsuspecting people.

 

[Mendacious Trumpet]

Huh, I didn't realise Tattle was full. Glad I snuck in back when the door was open and unattended. Feel a bit sorry for potential future Fraus stuck outside though

Just started looking through the Thrifty Kitchen hashtag and now I'm just even more excited for the book release. It's going to be dire!

 

[Hollaaa]

 

[Valiofthedolls]

View attachment 1840418God help me. That’s from the official Guardian front page article

Fuck me, that HAS to be the Guardian throwing shade at “psephologist” Jack and her “weird little misshapen body”, surely? They make her sound a right idiotic twat.

If not, the Guardian are dimwitted idiots too.