Jack Monroe #42
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Ok now admittedly I have had a glass of wine but I think I've cracked her unwholesome obsession with David Walliams!
He has small features in a big face. I mean, he has at least twice as much face as your average person.
Jack has big features in a really small face. And as - judging by recent photos - her eyes her getting bigger, her lips are getting bigger and her nose is definitely getting bigger, she must be looking to secure more facial territory.
And who better to claim it from than a privileged male millionaire who already has more than his fair share of everything? Look out Walliams, Citizen Monroe is coming for your boat race!
(Btw this probably won't seem so funny to me in the morning)
He has small features in a big face. I mean, he has at least twice as much face as your average person.
Jack has big features in a really small face. And as - judging by recent photos - her eyes her getting bigger, her lips are getting bigger and her nose is definitely getting bigger, she must be looking to secure more facial territory.
And who better to claim it from than a privileged male millionaire who already has more than his fair share of everything? Look out Walliams, Citizen Monroe is coming for your boat race!
(Btw this probably won't seem so funny to me in the morning)
Is noses getting bigger a thing? This is my fear!
Re: the accent. There is nothing wrong whether someone speaks RP or with a regional accent, whether it's cut-glass or not. Nobody cares nowadays.
The fact is that Jack is a fraud. She pretends to be something she isn't.
She comes from a comfortable, solidly middle-class background. Ballet lessons, Range Rover, grammar school. Multiple properties in the family. But she pretends to be working class and from poverty.
The fact is that Jack is a fraud. She pretends to be something she isn't.
She comes from a comfortable, solidly middle-class background. Ballet lessons, Range Rover, grammar school. Multiple properties in the family. But she pretends to be working class and from poverty.
Food expert
and top advice again from Jack. I have no idea how mussels work, but surely she should put this in her main posts?
and top advice again from Jack. I have no idea how mussels work, but surely she should put this in her main posts?
It’s a mistake.
To me if it’s between asking your parents - with extensive experience of childcare remember - to help out and having to sell your kid’s favourite toy and sleep with them on a mattress on the floor...she didn’t lose her job, she bloody packed it in, and less than 12 months later got a book deal?? Nahhh, mateView attachment 176201
the Christmas thing bugged me so I googled. I knew I’d read before that she went to her parents’ house. In another she says she sent him to his dad’s. plus she got paid for the articles where she says she can’t buy him anything, in DecemberAfter that she got the first book deal. She lies so much!!
edit-caveat again any rage is towards HER
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Oh Penns, this is not your fault at all, and this was very funny, but you've reminded me of one of the worst insults I ever received. When I was a teenager someone once described me as 'that girl with the big round face'. I still carry that moon-face little barb with me, (though my face isn't particularly round anymore) along with the slightly more palatable but still oddly upsetting 'The thing about you is that you are pretty, but not at all sexy' that I got, a few years later, from someone I very much wanted to find me all the sexy.
Some more random data for your triangulation @Gentlemensrelish!
She conflated not being loaded with poverty. Growing up, my family weren't rich but we got by and definitely didn't experience bone crushing poverty in any way shape or form. To these luvvie types, there's either absolutely loaded or poverty stricken and no in between. She dated Allegra and probably thought that that's the opposite of poverty but how many people are multi millionaires? It's not the norm
You don’t choose the gifs, the gifs choose you
The Monroe method, take something simple and make it really bleeping complicatedFrom that peanut butter article:
Jack Monroe uses salted peanuts because they tend to be cheaper, then roasts them again “to deepen the flavour”. As she rinses them afterwards, they are not overpoweringly salty
Of course she does
Exactly. It's like Mockney. Trying to sound more 'street cred'. And it just makes her risible. She is so obviously middle class, from her attitudes to her voice
Maybe her husband said you can’t ‘put’ them in the freezer. You just have to ‘sling’ them in. Silly!Food expert
I would have gone under more than once in the last ten years without my mum.
Not to keep the roof over my head but living on a pittance has been very hard. Both in and out of work.
Oh man
That bloody docking station must be like the Hokey Cokey. She puts the iPhone in, takes the Android out, in, out, in, out...
Oh and Jack, there's a difference between being bad with money and "poor". I was bad with money for years and constantly broke but I earned a decent salary, was just terrible with budgeting and spent it on rubbish. Lived from week to week. Being poor means you never actually have it in the first place
If you're admitting that you've done/are doing well Jack then you'll agree it's time to remove that tip jar.
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