I've just had a listen to the original song and can confirm that her version is incomprehensible, irreverent and indecipherable as the same song.
Jack Monroe #396 She’s gonna break her spine if she pats herself on the back any harder
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Hahahahahahahaha I’m HOWLING at this
I'm in a shared office so I dug out my bluetooth earphones (fancy!) to have a listen and forgot to sync them so the whole office heard it. I nearly sprained a hand I turned it off so quickly. I've just rewatched happily synced and I've died. Send lifeo.
Why is she so desperate to have a music career specifically? It seems so random.
Many fraus on here are excellent at giving armchair psych evaluations (of course no one is likely qualified to do this but they are entertaining reads). Anyone able to shed some light?
So speaking as someone who’s been prone to contracting laryngitis(actual confirmed) the last few years every time they get a common cold, Jack’s ‘singing’ voice, length of time she reckons she had it and the fact she managed to be able to speak the whole time just with a ‘sexy’ husky voice is where she gives away her lie. I’m not saying it’s making me “smell a rat” or anything like that, because we all know it’s just more of her pointless, ridiculous lies. Also yes laryngitis isn’t contagious, but you tend to get it from a cold for example and that is. Every time I get it I can’t speak for days except for this painfully forced, back of the throat whisper. You lose your voice it doesn’t just go a bit husky and croaky like a standard sore throat.
She likely wasn’t even ill, but definitely didn’t have laryngitis and has likely never had it, because she can’t even semi convincingly lie about it.
How cringingly pathetic do you have to be to invent an illness you don’t have to give yourself an excuse to sing and humble brag about your awful voice that you so clearly think is great. And now apparently she’s “dusting off a guitar”but you don’t think you can sing Jack? She is the most narcissistic narcissist that ever lived.
This is so true, I worked with someone who had laryngitis (confirmed) reguarly and would lose her voice for TWO WEEKS. Poor woman sounded awful, croaky for ages.
I cackled at this
Just bringing forward from the last thread that @NomDeGuerre is to blame if Jack brings out the Big Dave big guns with Celine's Think Twice. I might as well stick it on the bingo card for this thread because it feels like literally anything could happen.
No, no, you’ve got it all wrong. Jack’s laryngitis is the sort that turns your voice into a parody of a diggity dawg Yank. Only specialists can diagnose it.So speaking as someone who’s been prone to contracting laryngitis(actual confirmed) the last few years every time they get a common cold, Jack’s ‘singing’ voice, length of time she reckons she had it and the fact she managed to be able to speak the whole time just with a ‘sexy’ husky voice is where she gives away her lie. I’m not saying it’s making me “smell a rat” or anything like that, because we all know it’s just more of her pointless, ridiculous lies. Also yes laryngitis isn’t contagious, but you tend to get it from a cold for example and that is. Every time I get it I can’t speak for days except for this painfully forced, back of the throat whisper. You lose your voice it doesn’t just go a bit husky and croaky like a standard sore throat.
She likely wasn’t even ill, but definitely didn’t have laryngitis and has likely never had it, because she can’t even semi convincingly lie about it.
How cringingly pathetic do you have to be to invent an illness you don’t have to give yourself an excuse to sing and humble brag about your awful voice that you so clearly think is great. And now apparently she’s “dusting off a guitar”
In all honesty we should all be chipping in to her patreon cos the level of entertainment she gives us is defo worth £3.50, tit I’d even pop a fiver in her tip jar for that singing vid alone- absolute comedy gold - still crying 
here
hereI’ve heard Gazza is on his way over with a couple tins of Irn Bru and a fishing rod
I'd rather an album of originals than a recipe book as her next product!
Imagine the hilarity, and if she tours it could provide a way for the canal to secretly meet up. Basically anyone in the audience doubled up laughing are the Fraus!
Ah yes… the kind that can only be cured with sage tea…
She’s shedding followers again.
Can’t think why?
Can’t think why?
I just assume like all her stories (and most of the "my kid said the most amazing thing the other day" stories on the internet) these things never actually happened. I hope so, for his sake.
“I hope this little snippet makes some of you smile” she really thinks she’s gods gift to the poors doesn’t she!!!!
Same. And I just had the thought-‘What if she did this at the Google dinner as an (attention seeking) ‘bit’
I thought she was having a heckin *shudders* big declutter? Why re-clutter your house with musical instruments that, after todays honking racket, YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS TOUCHING.
I see instead of a dead cat distraction technique, she gone for a Make Noises Like A Stepped On Hamster distraction technique.
Interesting strategem...
Interesting strategem...
My fella is on a video call and I just mutley tittered and had to hide under my jumper. Oh god oh god I can't
Oh it certainly did make me smile. Shame smiles don't pay the mortgage as my house would be paid off
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