Jack Monroe #384 You're churning out rinsed hoops and boiled slop, not storming the Bastille

[veronica71]

Can you all stop giving her excellent advice about how to get out of her patreon mess. The idea of ~all~ the postcards is keeping me going currently.

Loving all the new members particularly when they are really not sure if it’s a cabals joke or it’s actually something Jack did or said

Something I find amazing is how many pictures we have of Jack here but how 95% of them are selfies and she’s alone in them. You’d think with all the behind the scenes work she does and how she’s been involved in everything there’d be more photos of her out in the field so to speak. Makes you think.

 

[jenny2603]

It's all kicking off in the comments club

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Why are the nice people in the great, supportive community being mean? This is terrible.

 

[Pimpinella]

Back in the early threads we used to call them veiny cock hands. But this mummified specimen is something else. Can affect hands?

Over use of cocaine can cause vasoconstriction of the blood vessels but that leads to loss of sensation and constant coldness.... not sure about the state of hers...

 

[Lazarus]

Correction: including

Patreon:
£24 a month (+ VAT) gives you monthly discount codes for the shop, and the postcards which you get on the lower tiers. Does the discount include the Teemill stuff too? This tier also provides a signed copy of her book on release. The Tier below is £12 a month and gives discount codes and cards.
so if you’re on £24 a month, you’re paying £12 a month for a signed book before general release. If she hasn’t released a book for 2yrs and you’re on that tier, the book has essentially cost you £288 alone.

Correction: including VAT it’s £345.60

 

[Veronicaaa]

Why are the nice people in the great, supportive community being mean? This is terrible.

Everyone here is lovely!

 

[Captainmouse]

Also she doesn't address the point that she crowdfunded the donations, meaning people bought her books off her so she was paid to send them.

Also she charged retail, she didn’t pay retail, so ripped them off

 

[GrannyOgg]

Why are the nice people in the great, supportive community being mean? This is terrible.

It appears not all members of the comments club were picked with care. They aren’t all idiots

 

[LavaFlake]

The fact she got away with the Kickstarter debacle first time round demonstrates her PhD x 2 was in gaslight, gatekeep and girlbossing.

Thankfully people are more canny to grifting nowadays.

 

[Smeghead]

Correction: including

Correction: including VAT it’s £345.60

If the book has been touched by The Hands of Slop it will be worth every penny, Dear Heart. Similar to Holy Water I would imagine

 

[Katkat]

Okay, my dog hates me now so you can all join him

Spoiler: The massive Gloss archive 2016

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Sorry I started trying to put them in order but gave up. And I didn’t get every single day of the advent calendar

Thank you for your time and effort

 

[BurgerLaBill]

Has she gone to Ireland then? I've been doing my accounts all morning.

 

[hrgrmr47]

Okay, my dog hates me now so you can all join him

Spoiler: The massive Gloss archive 2016

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Sorry I started trying to put them in order but gave up. And I didn’t get every single day of the advent calendar

thank you! also that blonde hairstyle

 

[miss_terious]

Even if I thought she was completely above board with everything she was doing, she'd still annoy me. What a moany moper! "Feeling sick poor ickle me, but look at my makeup skillz!" And did she really say she'd used 15-YEAR-OLD makeup on her face????

 

[binkbonk]

I believe in the Burger King. She is pathetic enough to take to the internet to inform everyone that a real live human wanted to pump her. I do not believe the six hours of hot wild post burger sex Jackie is trying to sell us. Instead I think some squalid episode involving a creep in the night has taken place and Jacks being so very lonely was grateful for a quick hump 'n' dump to give her a little brag on the internet. Top tip Jack, some men are disgusting and would literally shag a hole in the ground, it's no great compliment to attract one of those ones. Maybe you and Therapy Hoop could do a lovely chat about about self respect and see if that does anything for you.

I am absolutely losing it at "I believe in the Burger King."

 

[hrgrmr47]

Not forgetting a Disabled Persons Railcard which gives you a third off all fares, including the tube at any time of day. Maybe though it’s not for pretend multiple disabilities.

if she has a railcard then an anytime return from Thorpe Bay to Fenchurch Street is £14.70 (so under £15…)

 

[TheMcMommy]

You've probably seen this, I'm lunching and grunking (lunking/grunching?) here and on Twitter and Christ alive, there are some absolute melters out there. Someone contact the Pope and nominate her for sainthood and just be done with it. Now excuse me while I go unroll my eyes from the back of my head.

Oh and a word of advice if you're on Twitter, don't turn on notifications on her tweets. I did it a few days ago and it's exhausting and infuriating. How is live-tweeting the mundane minutiae of your life doing ANYTHING to help those in poverty? How is this work?

 

[Boyo]

FORRENSSIC

You can’t spell ‘assymetric’ without ‘ass’. Really makes you think.

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

I'll post photos of my boys on Facebook from time to time, mainly as we live quite far away from a lot of family and friends. I do it far less often these days as I'm more aware that these pictures are there to stay. I always let them know if I'm posting and they look at the photos first to ok them. I certainly wouldn't be sharing details of their behaviour or the level of info Monroe does and I'm not in the public eye or posting to a Glastonbury sized audience.She thinks calling him a cutesy nickname will protect him? Really?

Spoiler: TW - SA

Babe, same. The majority of my family live in Sweden. I made a private album on FB that only family can see and my profile is private and my kids are never in my profile or cover pics. I might be a judgemental frau here but I deplore of the fact that there are some mums with totally open SM and there are tons of pics of the kids in the bath or paddling pool. Pictures like that are often stolen by Pedalos. It's horrible and not worth it. Of course this is the era of insta huns using their children for content and done people set their morals by Sleb behaviour

OT - Jack is selfie daft.

 

[hellohellohello_123]

Am I the only one who reads Tattle first and then Jack’s Twitter after?

Here is so much more entertaining and saves me trawling through endless mindless tweets in search of the good stuff.

When I'm grunking from far back in the past (about 24 hours in Jack land), I sometimes check Jack's most recent tweets as it makes me feel like I know what's coming ahead of the rest of the canal (the past version of them). A kind of dramatic irony, if you will. It's only when I tried to write this down that I realised how hard it is to explain, so sorry if this makes no sense

 

[Edie Po]

Correction: including

Correction: including VAT it’s £345.60

I'd pay that for Coops book.
That's cats seen things and smelt things no cat should.
Bet he's on a 40 day rollie habit slagging her off to the neighbourhood animals.