Is Carbon Off Set Squig going to pay for the emissions from delivering that many postcards?
Jack Monroe #384 You're churning out rinsed hoops and boiled slop, not storming the Bastille
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I've finally got it...she looks like Anthony Hopkins playing Hannibal Lecter.
Boiler suit. Check.
Slicked back hair. Check.
Weird pose. Check.
Bizarre grin. Check.
Blank stare. Check.
I wonder if she's having Clarice around for a liver and chianti supper.
I haven't got the skill to do a side by side picture.
Kath Day-Knight is a Quoin!
I’m still in Kryten curtain boilersuit days, hope I get insomnia so I can grunka
A suspected sock is posting or was posting on a Molly thread
Begbie. Same temperament and hobbies too.
Tattle’s Patreon project didn’t start til Feb 2021 - probably because it had been 3 odd months since her last post - but churn wasn’t pretty consistently at 2-4% so you could try and estimate where she’d have been pretty easily, >350 would be a fair estimate imo? Graphtreon is newer than this project but you can see if they have the data over there.
As others have pointed out, making amends isn’t just do you want my bones to grind to DUST?? level defensiveness, you actually have to make things right by the other person, not just patch over it and pray you’ve got out of jail free. To do this it’d make her Patreon some sort of tit Ponzi scheme where the money coming in now is used to pay out old subscribers, and realistically can she afford to lose her primary income like that? She’d be better fessing up to it all before everything crashes down before her and she doesn’t even get booked by nice but dim JOB anymore.
Better get his chainsaw out, there's a forest that needs to be culled to deliver on Jack's Patreon promises.
‘What’s that noise?’ whispers Jan, the manager of Southend Post Office.
‘I’m not sure Jan, it’s loud though!’ shouts Kenneth, the local postie.
Kenneth’s eyes widen. Jan realises in horror what is happening.
It’s Jack Monroe and her 50,000 high quality, double sided post cards.
It’s too late for Jan and Kenneth, they have been buried beneath the high quality, double sided postcards. There’s no way to escape.
‘I HAVE ADHD!!!!!!!’ screams Jack.
The post office was closed, permanently, shortly after the incident.
‘I’m not sure Jan, it’s loud though!’ shouts Kenneth, the local postie.
Kenneth’s eyes widen. Jan realises in horror what is happening.
It’s Jack Monroe and her 50,000 high quality, double sided post cards.
It’s too late for Jan and Kenneth, they have been buried beneath the high quality, double sided postcards. There’s no way to escape.
‘I HAVE ADHD!!!!!!!’ screams Jack.
The post office was closed, permanently, shortly after the incident.
Orphan - you are a genius. It’s the cat that finished me off.
Don't be sorry, I'm sorry I'f you thought I was angry..Sorry, I misunderstood.
Xxxxxx sending love
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Hannibal Lecter was practically a vegan too
There's a couple of people in my office like that.This is why she's a financial liability.
The equivalent of that is to say, do you know what, for the next 2 years in my job I'm just not going to do any work. At all.
This account is not a new one either, flying monkeys are nowhere to be found.
Please can someone do a 3x3 collage of all the things her picture has been compared to, with the original in the middle? 
Surely she could do a special recipe thing via email or something for her Patreons? Better still would have been to do a meeting every now and then via zoom, could have spoken about matters close to everyone’s hearts, such as thrifty living and nightmeat etc, and she’d have made many of them very happy I’m sure. The postcards thing was never going to be feasible. She could do a live lucky dip draw for a few winners of postcards on her zoom meetings. There you go Jack, that’s some proper Patreon content for ya.
ETA: she would have made some real human connections there too.
ETA: she would have made some real human connections there too.
I mean holy tit. Why oh why did she not nix this in month 2 or 3 when she realised she couldn't fulfil it. Did she think people just wouldn't notice? And sorry I don't buy the ADHD excuse, the time this has gone on and escalated has been way too long.
Just to add this is the one thing that drew me in to start commenting here so no sympathy, but wow writing a long form on how you are boiling soap but you are sitting on these funds and all the other tip jar rattles, its is just WOW.
What are the postcards *of* please?!
I feel the need to bring this post over from the last thread because it made me laugh so much and I wanted to share the joy. Especially if Fraus are speed grunking.
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