Jack Monroe #365 I suggest you delete your Tweet

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Will be offering this as a print, subscribe to my patreon and I'll send a postcard
 
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Phew. Middle-class twat credentials intact. Can confirm I have a wood-burning stove
Ha, I have two, but no other heating. By the way, Jack, you need to let that wood season for at least two years or it'll just smoulder.
Is Jack moving down in the world, she had a two-bedroom flat 10 years ago?
 
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Got 'em.
Christ, could she be more blatant?
I'm torn now between thinking it's definitely her as she has no life beyond Twitter and bating Tattle (you can't sit with us, pal). But that latest Tweet feels too piss takey for Jack who is a comedy / sense of humour free zone.
 
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I'm torn now between thinking it's definitely her as she has no life beyond Twitter and bating Tattle (you can't sit with us, pal). But that latest Tweet feels too piss takey for Jack who is a comedy / sense of humour free zone.
If there's one thing Jack can't do (beside cooking edible food and providing Patreon rewards), it's taking the piss out of herself.
 
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If there's one thing Jack can't do (beside cooking edible food and providing Patreon rewards), it's taking the piss out of herself.
Brian Butterfield, full-time nefarious asshat and part-time Tattle Detective standing down from sock detection duties.
 
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What if... It is Jack, but being OTT obvious so that Ninnies will think it isn't her but that some strange person likes pretending to be her socks, and so then we might also write off some of the other suspected socks that actually are her, as being the strange person as well..?

https://giphy.com/8OGSTCUERtFaRXFFTV
 
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The only thing I'm sure of anymore is that Jack has too much time on her damn hands. She's boring. Basic. Dull.

Here's a hint, instead of getting excited about probably imaginary non-paying gigs, get a bloody job, Jack. A real one. That pays money.

(Also agree with you clever lot about her probably having a place already lined up in 6 months time.)
 
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I have been offered an amazing opportunity, I'm so excited! I'm jacking in my job to write the next oscar winning blockbuster. Lord of the Rings meets DKL. Send cashos.
 
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Aren't the fire services asking people to not start fires? Regardless of a few thunderstorms, the south is a tinderbox right now.
 
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Jack, please don’t try to build a DIY fireplace out of old bricks and blu tack or something stupid like that. I beg of you.

Also, wood needs to dry for months before you burn it. It’s probably too late for winter use.
Referencing @PowerliftingOtter earlier...
"But she's a literal fire prevention expert?"
 
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“Yoik” urgh
On a slight detour, why is it that the “super lefty (and I’m lefty), be kind, simp squigs” all revel in using the same kind of infantile, toe curling language?

yoik
Yummy
Nom nom
Heckin

it’s like a Professor Umbridge type scenario whereby the more evil you are the more baby waby sweetsie talky talks you do.

JM using “asshat” makes me die of cringe related trauma too so special shout out for that
 
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