Jack Monroe #347 Nationalise Patreon!

[Nottonightbabe]

Off topic Guardian-related Me-rail

For a few years I made a small annual donation because there was stuff on there that I liked to read but decided, in part because of Jack and Sali Hughes, that they weren’t getting another penny out of me and I wasn’t reading it any more.

So I tried to contact them to cancel, and to let them know why. It was so difficult, nigh on impossible to do so, and without giving them a lot more personal info about me than they actually had, that I gave up, and just cancelled the recurring DD.

Then I get this passive aggressive semi-chastising and patronizing email when they try to take this year’s payment. Lol get to duck with your “continually unable” and “if you can” (not if you want to) This to me was absolute confirmation (as if I needed it) that I should indeed have cancelled.

I think I’ll be “continually able” to survive without the quality in-depth journalism too.
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Me-rail rant over. Sorry

"Quality journalism".

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

REALLY off topic now, but there was a very, very handsome German firefighter (a real one, not a call handler) in that column a few years ago who I think might be my equivalent of the tree surgeons.

Spoiler: Off Topic Heroic Handsome Firefighter

Experience: I saved a boy trapped in a safe

All the experts told us the boy was going to die – only his late grandfather knew the code

www.theguardian.com

Something's simmering.

 

[auntylil]

Don’t forget she claimed all our wheat comes from Ukraine (it doesn't) and there would be no bread etc

This was going to be my favourite lie, because I haven't been around to witness as many as lots of you, alongside: she warned the Govt in JANUARY about the wheat crisis resulting from Russia's invasion of Ukraine. Which began on 24 February.
Forensic Jack.

 

[Emmapism]

I wonder if the lip fillers (like the very expensive puppy) were kindly gifted.

The Patreon money is also a very very kind gift, I guess? Maybe slightly less because people actually expected ~something~ in return for their money.

Christ. So many kind people. I wouldn't worry about the zero pounds and zero pence in your bank account Jack. You've got loads of people to help you out with the essentials! All those things we all take for granted really. Labradoodles and dermal fillers are always top of my shopping list these days!

 

[Wooh]

I don't know about you guys. I regularly go to my magic designer dogs tree, give it a good shake and see what I end up with.

That's what some of the breeders of designer dogs do, too!

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

I wonder if the lip fillers (like the very expensive puppy) were kindly gifted.

The Patreon money is also a very very kind gift, I guess? Maybe slightly less because people actually expected ~something~ in return for their money.

Christ. So many kind people. I wouldn't worry about the zero pounds and zero pence in your bank account Jack. You've got loads of people to help you out with the essentials! All those things we all take for granted really. Labradoodles and dermal fillers are always top of my shopping list these days!

This is what puzzles me all these kind people must see her saying she’s got £20 for a food shop for her and her son and piling her basket with yellow stickers and instead of saying “Jack we’ll buy you a food shop treat yourself and get yourself whatever you want, add some extra special bits too if you want” it’s “have a dog” which means another mouth to feed & vet bills it makes zero sense.

 

[Hollaaa]

Badman Jack is by far and away the least convincing of all the Jack iterations. It’s like a combination of Vanilla Ice and Tracy Beaker.
It is my firmly held theory that she read the Bell Jar and Girl Interrupted at a formative age and has based all her stories about this subject on those.

Hahaha Jack *is* Lelaina Pierce sulking on the sofa before scamming her dad's gas card after performatively quitting her entry level job in TV. One for the #1978truthers there.

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

Wasn’t eamonn’s cousin the Easter island statue?

@Shesaidwhat? We aren’t making it up!!

Was it not someone claiming to be his cousin? I might have completely got my facts wrong here

 

[PuritySpiral]

My friend had a beautiful big labradoodle who was in the 45kg range. Daft sausage knocked me over a few times.

Best get onto lead training if you're convinced content will be almost as big as you Jack... Oh no, forgot you're too BUSY searching yourself on twitter. Muppet.

45kg is a large amount of dog - it's about just about 7 stone I think. Most adult women within the normal height range don't weigh barely 7 stone.

 

[Veronicaaa]

The IEA bros are savage.

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Can you imagine? A quick look on their timeline will show them being up in arms about a proposed Traveller site and calling them all the usual names but will be tripping over themselves offering Traveller Jack shelter on their driveway.

She would be an Acceptable Traveller. "She's alright it's all those other ones". Just like she's the acceptable face of the poor.

 

[Sideboard Bob]

Eamonn Holmes’ cousin this way

Jack Monroe #63 I tend to move in circles of cookery and politics rather than outrage and vitriol

I love reading old JM articles. In one from around 2014 she's dissing Jamie O for being sponsored by Uncle Ben's and wailing about generic brand rice being so much more affordable. Skip to 2020, hello Hellman's. She would take any sponsors, collabs and cash she could get her hands on now...

tattle.life

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

Eamonn Holmes’ cousin this way

Jack Monroe #63 I tend to move in circles of cookery and politics rather than outrage and vitriol

I love reading old JM articles. In one from around 2014 she's dissing Jamie O for being sponsored by Uncle Ben's and wailing about generic brand rice being so much more affordable. Skip to 2020, hello Hellman's. She would take any sponsors, collabs and cash she could get her hands on now...

tattle.life

Where did I get it from they had an Easter Island statue as a display photo? I swear it happened.

 

[Phillipa78]

45kg is a large amount of dog - it's about just about 7 stone I think. Most adult women within the normal height range don't weigh barely 7 stone.

Yeah, I just looked it up and top end for standard poodle is around 32kg and Labrador is 38kg. I guess he was an outlier (height of the poodle and chunk of the lab), but he's the only dog who's ever put me on my backside! He would bound up to you and put his paws on your shoulders. Add momentum and you stood no chance!

In all seriousness, a dog of contents size should be getting socialised and trained in anticipation of those difficult adolescent months.

ETA found some reports of them getting to 100lbs!! Eekkk.

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Where did I get it from they had an Easter Island statue as a display photo? I swear it happened.

I remembered that too.

Help us out.

 

[Soup or Noodle]

Oh. I thought Brian Moore was a footballer

Me too

 

[Jelly Bean]

I might be maligning Jack unfairly. Oh dear. But didn't she bring Content home on the train on the day of a rail strike?

 

[TillyMiffin]

BIB for next #threadtitle 'cause it's just genius

Me too! & thankfully, we were both right (for once, in my case, ha!) x

Still grunking, still waiting with baited breath for the big reveal...desperately trying not to skip forward 7 pages, to see if it's happened yet!

I thought he wrote the ‘watchmen’ comics..

 

[MooBelle]

Love the Dog Truth Squigs, they have the tenacity of Viggles.

Diggles?

Please let them be called Diggles.

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

I might be maligning Jack unfairly. Oh dear. But didn't she bring Content home on the train on the day of a rail strike?

A bus I think but she' didn't pay for the dog or the fare so it never happened