Jack Monroe #344 344%

[FunnyFuneral]

I studied The Rime of the Ancient Mariner for A level and learnt it off by heart as I loved it so much. Can probably still remember most of it.
Here goes...

Don't worry, I'm not that mean...or bored.

Water water everywhere, nor yet a drop to drink,
I dont like baked bean sauce so I rinse it down the sink.

Takes a bow and accepts role of Poet Laureate

 

[NellieBoo]

Can a frau find the clip of her plinky plonking on the piano? One handed and looking wistful? I've tried but can't.

Obviously, I won't watch it because it's burned into my memory where I was very close to dying of The Cringe.

 

[L3moning]

I studied The Rime of the Ancient Mariner for A level and learnt it off by heart as I loved it so much. Can probably still remember most of it.
Here goes...

Don't worry, I'm not that mean...or bored.

I love the fact that Iron Maiden did a song based on it, which is described as a very abridged retelling.

It's nearly 14 minutes long.

 

[Captainmouse]

Can a frau find the clip of her plinky plonking on the piano? One handed and looking wistful? I've tried but can't.

Obviously, I won't watch it because it's burned into my memory where I was very close to dying of The Cringe.

Found the image

 

[hellosailor⚓]

Auden v Jack: Coming out of me kitchen is always stinking, stinking changing and changing kitchen.

 

[colouredlines]

Given that Larkin got mentioned by Jack at some point, I'm surprised we've not had a They duck you up, your mum and dad mention yet.

Or, as someone I know recently tweeted, after mentioning Larkin, "They read your tweets, your mum and dad"

The Larkin she misquoted is that same poem, but she chose the third stanza rather than the first. Don't have any kids yourself, the final line of the poem, seems an odd choice for a woman who recently struggled through several miscarriages, but that was THEN, etc.

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

I wandered lonely as a cloud

Because I'm a pain in the ass and drive everyone mad

 

[Sideboard Bob]

She’s replying to squigs but they’re pretty 🥱 and I’m BUSY. (I put a film on)

 

[NellieBoo]

Found the image
View attachment 1440783

Ah. That's enough

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Pretty boring? You are being kind.

Off to watch Blown Away on Netflix. Love a good glass blow.

 

[Mrs Peel]

Maybe Ballet Jack will delight us by joining forces with Poetry Jack and portraying some of her misquoted poems via the medium of interpretive dance. Sleeve tattoos and all.


View attachment 1440718

(I just wanted an excuse to post this picture again, because, well, you know why. The absolute tool. )

Christ alive, Swan Lake Jack has just about done me in.

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Maybe Ballet Jack will delight us by joining forces with Poetry Jack and portraying some of her misquoted poems via the medium of interpretive dance. Sleeve tattoos and all.


View attachment 1440718



(I just wanted an excuse to post this picture again, because, well, you know why. The absolute tool. )

 

[flightofthealligator]

LJC on a bike Poetry Jack is the worst Jack (in terms of boringness, not triggering awfulness)

is she Yeats-ing it right up to distract from this:

View attachment 1440714
But what does it mean? Where does this leave her? Will we ever know about her 2020 tax situation? Will she still have to pay???

I SIMPLY MUST KNOW!

I have to know as well!! Did this come from the accountant? Was it revenge for her god awful baking that she needed hell site randos to tell her what to make?!

 

[Phillipa78]

Pretty boring? You are being kind.

Off to watch Blown Away on Netflix. Love a good glass blow.

Spoiler: Glassblowing

highly recommend this if you enjoy glassblowing, stunt wigs and corpsing

 

[hellosailor⚓]

 

[Onestorytoomany]

OT, just been thinking linking up the comment on Gyles brandreth and oscar wilde. Gyles wrote a series of books based on Oscar's life, which includes run in with various classic authors. They are in my opinion fantastic books. I read them during lockdown and was actually sad when I finished them.

 

[NellieBoo]

Christ alive, Swan Lake Jack has just about done me in.

Conqueror of Fears.

 

[traumatised sideboard]

No wonder Harold ran for the hills. Imagine your Saturday night being Jack honking poetry at you as you're trying to enjoy a steampunk cream soda in the hopes of dislodging a thumbprint cookie from your gullet.

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

Jack: a haiku -

Conqueror of fears,
A former foodbank user,
No butter, she RENTS.

 

[colouredlines]

No wonder Harold ran for the hills. Imagine your Saturday night being Jack honking poetry at you as you're trying to enjoy a steampunk cream soda in the hopes of dislodging a thumbprint cookie from your gullet.

Harold: "Morning my dear, how are you?"

Jack: *recites The Waste Land in its entirety*