Jack Monroe #343 A heavy dose of chickpea and loathing

[TankGirl]

Black and Decker Pecker Wrecker.

THREAD TITLE NOMINATION!

 

[frankychester]

I mentioned in the previous thread that it's possible she was both the director of the company that was struck off and a sole trader. The company may have been set up but never actually used to report income. That might explain why she never bothered to keep the information up to date.

I've said this all along as a reason not to put too much hope in HMRC bringing her down via On A Bootstrap Ltd - it's entirely possible she was raking in all the money from TV etc as a sole trader.

 

[Amanda Lin]

Here you go, dear heart - I'm sure you'll agree it was worth the wait x

View attachment 1437637

The bean to sauce ratio is “little “ off

 

[Captainmouse]

"I can see a lot of effort went into these"

Naahh, 'things' may have been bunged into them, effort was not included

 

[Captainmouse]

I think she's really not enjoying the whole puppy thing. I'd go as far to say she's hating it.
Jack is a massive oversharer and the fact that she's shared so little makes me think that she's over it already.
When you get a puppy you can't help but bore people to shit with photos, stories, etc. You talk non stop about how many times it gets you up in the night, or when it's finally pooped outside. How much it seems to eat for such a small thing! You whine about how you're meant to stop the tiny little raptor from chewing on everything......especially toes. You document first time in the garden, first time out the house, first visit to families houses, etc. Yet there is none of that??
She's no longer talking about her sb like he lives there because it's obvious he doesn't. I think the dog posts will stop quicker than we all thought. Then a year down the line there will be a post about how it was never really her dog and she was just dogsitting.

Remember how it was with mini? it went very quiet very quick

 

[Nottonightbabe]

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This afternoon already feels LONG.

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

Has anyone ever seen Branston on a shopping list?

 

[Boogs]

This is next-level freakery. Although saying that, it's probably worse to give your location away... A phone number can easily be changed.
Good job she hasn't... oh...

She really is a major incident waiting to happen.

 

[StatusWoe]

Just wanted to inform the canal that there's an old folk song called 'Barbara Allen' which is sometimes known as 'Barbry Allen'. My mind has now changed the lyrics to -
if your name be Borbry Allen

Lucy-A gave a good insight that Jack hasn't got any IRL friends. You'd feel bad for her, but it's her own fault, she's a hideous kinda person. If someone becomes her friend she soon makes them regret it. Look at Spaniel Friend and her concern on Content.

She's odious. People probably have called her out in reality, she dumps and ghosts them, just like Twitter. (imo.)

Yeah that could be true Even if it's Jack's fault, I still think it's a sad situation. Imagine driving away all your friends and not developing enough self-awareness to notice that you're the problem.

 

[MsGilmore]

Don’t make me search Southend Deliveroo again!

No need - probably KFC really!

 

[Onestorytoomany]

I mean this might be a tad paranoid but I reckon she’s posted it cos she’s hoping a member of the canal will be daft enough to call it. And then she can triangulate them using her Mossad-level triangulation skills which will allegedly lead her all the way up to the front door.

seriously, though - she just wants another stalking storyline. Hasn’t been one of those for a while. Or it’s all about Harold, as other Fraus have speculated

I can honestly say I wouldn't talk to her on the phone even if she handed me a phone with it already ringing her. Nope, not a chance. Of she didn't bore me tears, she would drive me round the bend with her endless shiite talk!

 

[Boogs]

I wish I hadn't seen this. It makes me scared of my own teeth, never mind Jack's.

I’m sorry, please don’t build a house outside my front door

I am a greedy bugger with high tolerance levels but you couldn’t pay me enough money to eat those.

 

[Captainmouse]

How do Jack's cookies look more like Yorkshire puddings than her "perfect" Yorkshire puddings? View attachment 1435337

They look like fritters

 

[OwlRightsReserved]

Glaswegian fraus, can we blame Jack's visit and influence for the Chip going full metal chain, in restaurant parlance?
For the non-locals, a well-established fancy West End restaurant in Glasgow which is one of three differently-named/themed hostelries owned by a local family (microchain?) has been bought by a national pub macrochain.

Definitely her fault.

 

[Ostapbender]

Naahh, 'things' may have been bunged into them, effort was not included

Oh no, Jack works hard is what a squig would say about Jack cranking out any old shit

 

[Amanda Lin]

But it’s not Tuesday

Last day of school? Inset day?

CALL999

NOT nICE

Ahem, this has been her busiest week of work in months. She lay in a hammock and pretended to edit, she wrote a spite dedication, she shared heatwave food tips and invented stretchy hummus, she tweeted about fire, she baked TWO kinds of cookies...and all this with her teeth crumbling and her shoulder in constant, agonising pain. A true hero.

Being spiteful to Bobora is not in any job description pal.

 

[usefullyuseless]

Has she had her j1g for breakfast? She's steaming already, it feels like it's going to be a long day!

Weekend chaos? We haven't had one of those for a while.

 

[Ostapbender]

Guarantee in the next photo of Content, her collar will feature a pendant engraved with "Space Squig, ask me about the box!"

Jack unironically wears a badge that reads 'Go Ahead, Make My Day'

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I think the same!


Kids in grammar schools aren't gifted, not like child prodigies, nope. Just more academic and nerdier. She only sat 7 GCSE's too, that's shockingly low for a grammar, so she can't have been that 'gifted'. (15 subjects was the standard at mine.)

I’m sure she’ll have some risible excuse very good reason for that which will invariably be wholly her parents’ fault, like why in her 30s she’s unable to swim (not even getting into that egregiousness), why she’s unable to drive etc (hidden autism diagnosis trauma) etc. Not sure whose fault the “cooking” is, mind.

 

[Arsov Cooper]

I'm coming in from a few hours ago. Off topic.

Spoiler: Neighbours and spite

I recently had to speak to my neighbour about the nuisance her SB was causing. This was not the first time and now I was shouting at him. She told me not to shout at her child, and if I had a problem I should speak to her. I spoke to her and she told me that her son was not causing a nuisance. I said I had been watching him for 15 minutes from an upstairs window and she said I was lying. Then she said that if I didn't like the nuisance her son was causing, I should move away. We've been here for 23 years. They moved in last month.


Spite. How the Donald bought Mar-a-Lago (copy and paste from Wikipedia)

Donald Trump learned about the estate after unsuccessfully trying to purchase and combine two apartments in Palm Beach for his family. He offered the Post family $15 million for it, but they rejected it. Trump purchased the land between Mar-a-Lago and the ocean from Jack C. Massey, the former owner of KFC, for $2 million,[19] stating he intended to build a home that would block Mar-a-Lago's beach view. The threat caused interest in the property to decline, and Trump ended up getting the property for $7 million in 1985.

There is no point in commenting on Trump's behaviour.