Jack Monroe #336 Her writing style makes me wish I’d never learnt to read

[Nottonightbabe]

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Well she's changed her tune then hasn't she?? She was chuffed that Scotland didn't get independence last time around. On the run up to the referendum she even went to the trouble of making up a Scottish sock account, so she could wade into Twitter debates without anyone telling her to piss off as it was fuck all to do with her. Then and now is it Jack?

 

[Satisfying Click]

Spoiler: Trifle Defender on poverty = theft

Edited to add background: TD has had some things stolen from her allotment. I bet her veg patch is loved and taken cared of. A Jack allotment would be overgrown and neglected.

 

[PunkyMonkey]

I feel embarrassed about my hyperbole here. It was unnecessary, and I wish I'd just said "I'm a female role model for her" instead of raving on about bursting. Sorry. I'm having a horrible cringe about all the shite I used to text and post when I drank. Apparently it didn't come out of nowhere. And boob, I guess, that's one of the reasons I've always found Jack a morbid fascination: she holds up a mirror to some traits I have learned it is wiser to manage

Hush up, little voice inside Wooh, that was a wonderful thing to read this morning and I'm really glad you posted it.

 

[SmillieKylie]

Oh my, there’s a tweet gone viral that has a fantasy cabinet, something the squigs love including Jack in as a rule, but she’s been dropped, it’s over, they’ve already forgotten about our Jacky, though her pal Martin Lewis continues on without her. I blame the absence of the Voluptuous Bootylicious Index…..send Nightmeat.

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

Oooh. Your nails . Well, the one we can see. I assume the rest are the same.

Makes a lovely change to see a clean hand on here

 

[Smeghead]

I am coming from a 24 hour behind grunk, so about a year in jack time.

someone said "nightmeat sounds like heartbeat" so:

nightmeat
why do you miss when my pumble kisses me?

nightmeat
why does a yellow sticker stay in my inventory?

and the pumble dall e that captain mouse asked for

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be back in real time soon! I've seen her twitter! nothing looks good!

I’ve had Nightmeat to the tune of Nightswimming by REM in my head for days…

Nightmeat, deserves a quiet night
The pork mince in the chiller, dated days ago
Turned around backwards so the yellow sticker shows
Every neon light reveals the price in reverse
Still, it's so much clearer
Is it 66p or 99p, it’s folded at the edge
I don’t even like cooking

 

[Emmapism]

910 words in that BBC interview. And not one of them was 'liar'.

 

[Orphan_Black]

But you can steal your son's identity to get a go Henry card

You can steal recipes off other chefs as long as you use cheaper ingredients that makes the meals inedible slop.

 

[Ostapbender]

New Jack dish just dropped

 

[Brian Butterfield]

Can someone be Thread Mother?

Sadly, I have swollen glands, a barking cough, shakes and prickly sweats - done a covid test and it’s negative but I’m heading to bed with a flask of herbal tea and some Day Nurse. Ughhhh I don’t really have time for this.

Send soupos and Pringelos.

 

[jenny2603]

I'd like to submit this new image for the charidee Teemill. I will do a new design every day until Iqbal gets justice.*



*or I lose interest and forget.

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

odd how she thinks shoplifters confine their activities to corporate-owned and large businesses. Cos Mr B with his small deli/cornershop/newsagents/offy/market stall/ greengrocers is never targeted.

 

[Sideboard Bob]

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

@Reyjavikgirl

I have never seen a Jack book real life ever.I really want to find some now so I can do things to them.

Also really appreciate how you and other Frauen write about addiction. Your words have impact and resonance.
Namaste

I'm going to my local Waterstones today to hide the two copies of her books left on the shelves. Might hide them in the fantasy section. (Or tip them down the back of the display). You could do this too! And thank you for your kind words. It's lovely to read. frauen are great xx

 

[Ostapbender]

Jack Monroe at Greenbelt 2017 - Greenbelt

This year, we were thrilled to welcome Jack Monroe to Greenbelt. Jack falls into the you-need-to-ask-four-or-five-years-in-a-row category of festival contributor. Along with the likes of Billy Bragg. But our hope is that now that Jack has said yes once, and been with us, then it might not take...

www.greenbelt.org.uk

Look, it's a festival visit from the Jackchives

"As a result of the case understandably swallowing them whole, we weren’t hearing back from Jack at all. We wanted to confirm details – talks titles, whether Jack would sit on panels, what accommodation was needed. And so on. But we were getting no answers. It was clear that Jack was overwhelmed with what was going on. And we were anxious that the toll the case was taking might well scupper Jack coming to Greenbelt after all.

And then, after weeks of waiting, and after our pitching a suggested talk title and blurb to Jack, a response came. Rather than go with our generic talk title suggestion, Jack came back with the idea of calling their talk “I was hungry and thirsty …”. Our hearts leapt. Not only was it game on, but Jack was clearly engaging wholeheartedly with the festival context too, choosing a title that would sit well with our core community. Added to which, Jack said a panel would be OK, too. Even one with the formidable Peter Oborne already booked in!"

"Pausing to sing a Jackie Oates song at one point, Jack drew to a close and received the first of their standing ovations – before opening up for questions. A session in which the miraculous happened."

 

[blurstoftimes]

LJC she’s a terrible parent. And a lazy dog owner, as we guessed she would be.

Dismissing her son’s thoughts, actions and feelings as “hormones” is so demeaning and condescending. The way she talks about him and broadcasts these private details is disgusting.

I bet he’s finally old enough to object to her bullshit. She can’t process or accept criticism (especially from The Boy, who she sees as beneath her) so she’s belittling him as merely hormonal.

12 year old problems are not resolved by isolating them and basically sending the message that they need to sort their feelings out on their own. What is wrong with her. After all he’s been through, having to be patient and forgiving of all of her tantrums and chaoses. i guess it’s only okay when it’s jack?

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I have an inordinate amount of questions about the crochet blanket skirt situation.

I think she was originally wearing Daisy Dukes but the unruly labia decided to make a wild bid for freedom so to avoid ruining their entire festival, the Eavis family told her she either wore the blanket or they were taking her stab vest.

Separately, I think that Sex Jack, Thot Shot Jack and Lurpack Jack have accidentally crossed the streams a la Ghostbusters and created, well…there’s I ain’t afraid of no ghosts, and there’s…this.

Spoiler: WARNING Click with EXTREME Care

Spoiler: I mean it, final warning

 

[Five hundred dogs]

“My name is Lenny and I’m a rambler”

#ramblersanonymous

I’m concerned about my mum. In the last few years it’s become apparent she’s developed a rambling problem, she’s at almost every weekend and sometimes during the week when there’s no group rambling going on she gets together with her friend Joan for a quick ramble. She’s even off to France for a rambling holiday in September!

 

[FrumpyCat]

If I didn't know better I'd swear she was trying to get her son bullied at school.

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Has Jack just told 500k people that her son wears his mother's clothes?

If In 30 years time Jack ends up as a mummified corpse on a rocking chsir, she has no one to blame except herself.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Agreed and one of the warning bells for me last night was when she was talking about male role models for her son and mentioned that she has men from her AA group around him. I really hope she's being EXTREMELY selective about that. In my experience of many years in recovery, men newly into AA can be quite volatile, obviously both men and women are but statistically male alcoholics and addicts are more likely to have form for violence, abuse and predatory behaviour caused by their addiction, or they're just arseholes. Ive been in situations in my naive early recovery where I've felt very scared in the rooms with male addicts violently kicking off, one pulled a knife on me once, one of my sponsees had a very unstable early recovery guy stalking her etc.

I am NOT making generalisations here about men in recovery, simply making the point that alkies and addicts can be volatile people especially in early recovery so there is a risk around who you invite into your home especially if you're a single woman and they're a dude. So I hope she is exercising appropriate caution.

I wrote a long thing but it felt inappropriate to say so much. There are so many things to consider and I don’t want to put anyone off at all, if you see the rooms for what they are and you lean into the wonderful caring acquaintanceship you can have with people from all different walks of life then fab. But yeah, the type of friendship the average 20/30 something woman needs is going to differ massively from the types a 30/40/50 year old bloke is able or wanting to provide. There are also a lot of incredibly lonely people who may respond to casual friendliness in an inappropriate manner. It’s complex and nuanced and unsurprisingly something Jackie cannot grasp.