Jack Monroe #336 Her writing style makes me wish I’d never learnt to read

[NellieBoo]

I have got to my age and have never seen the word hubristic used anywhere, am I reading the wrong books. Does she own a big thesaurus where she looks up stupid words to use instead of ordinary ones, tosser.

I'm not sure you can be mildly hubristic. Or have mild hubris. By the very definition of the word .

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Date for the diary Frauen

 

[usefullyuseless]

I find subway so stressful there's just too many choices and I get so anxious ordering.

Babe, same x

Me-rail below
When I'm in places like Subway I practice saying my order over and over in my head as I find situations like that very stressful. I also pray the staff don't ask me any unexpected questions that will throw me off.

 

[threeSMEGfridges]

All this talk reminds me of how much I bleeping love Lurpak, but bugger me am I gonna pay 5 quid a tub. I'll take the 50p best one alternative thanks

the ALDI danpak / norpak knock off is pretty good

 

[mchops]

I really hope Boris turns up at her meeting tomorrow. 3 months in just lost his job...
What you going to do then AA Jack ?
You're a tit bleep cosplaying evil tit.
I'm off now

 

[busylass]

I'm honestly thinking of rioting if I see another holier than thou twit assuming that all theft is to alleviate poverty. You can spot the people who've never had very little and then had what little they have nicked a mile off. I'd love to know what research these poor starving thieves do to make sure the person they're stealing from can afford to take the hit. In any case, most crime including theft occurs in the most economically deprived areas and it's galling to see some lazy grifter in her £800,000 palace casually solving poverty with "let the poor rob each other": Patreon for me, survival of the fittest for thee. And that goes for all her stupid squigs too. SH1TTERZ.

I’d like to nominate Patreon for me, survival of the fittest for thee for the next thread title.

 

[LennyBriscoe]

Noyouhaven'ttediousliar. This is Jack who at the grand old age of 26, was terrified by the young people dancing at Glastonbury, stayed in one field the whole time and left early. Bullshit was she ever a festival goer, let alone being drunk in a ditch at one.

I know I shouldn’t be surprised by this but it doesn’t make any sense! If you’re scared of the kids dancing and having a good time, you’re not shedding your clothes in your tent…unless of course Sex Jack was in town.

Shudder.

 

[NellieBoo]

Jack Monroe at Greenbelt 2017 - Greenbelt

This year, we were thrilled to welcome Jack Monroe to Greenbelt. Jack falls into the you-need-to-ask-four-or-five-years-in-a-row category of festival contributor. Along with the likes of Billy Bragg. But our hope is that now that Jack has said yes once, and been with us, then it might not take...

www.greenbelt.org.uk

Look, it's a festival visit from the Jackchives

"As a result of the case understandably swallowing them whole, we weren’t hearing back from Jack at all. We wanted to confirm details – talks titles, whether Jack would sit on panels, what accommodation was needed. And so on. But we were getting no answers. It was clear that Jack was overwhelmed with what was going on. And we were anxious that the toll the case was taking might well scupper Jack coming to Greenbelt after all.

And then, after weeks of waiting, and after our pitching a suggested talk title and blurb to Jack, a response came. Rather than go with our generic talk title suggestion, Jack came back with the idea of calling their talk “I was hungry and thirsty …”. Our hearts leapt. Not only was it game on, but Jack was clearly engaging wholeheartedly with the festival context too, choosing a title that would sit well with our core community. Added to which, Jack said a panel would be OK, too. Even one with the formidable Peter Oborne already booked in!"

"Pausing to sing a Jackie Oates song at one point, Jack drew to a close and received the first of their standing ovations – before opening up for questions. A session in which the miraculous happened."

Ah. There were group hugs and tears too. But she wasn't carried aloft on the shoulders of adoring fans .

 

[Emmapism]

That description of Jack not answering the festival organisers could have been written about the guy I just worked with.

You can't plan anything with them. And the amount of work needed just to help them to do the absolute bare minimum.......is not worth it.

A complete nightmare I still haven't recovered from

You couldn't pay me to have anything to do with her.

 

[LennyBriscoe]

Jack Monroe at Greenbelt 2017 - Greenbelt

This year, we were thrilled to welcome Jack Monroe to Greenbelt. Jack falls into the you-need-to-ask-four-or-five-years-in-a-row category of festival contributor. Along with the likes of Billy Bragg. But our hope is that now that Jack has said yes once, and been with us, then it might not take...

www.greenbelt.org.uk

Look, it's a festival visit from the Jackchives

"As a result of the case understandably swallowing them whole, we weren’t hearing back from Jack at all. We wanted to confirm details – talks titles, whether Jack would sit on panels, what accommodation was needed. And so on. But we were getting no answers. It was clear that Jack was overwhelmed with what was going on. And we were anxious that the toll the case was taking might well scupper Jack coming to Greenbelt after all.

And then, after weeks of waiting, and after our pitching a suggested talk title and blurb to Jack, a response came. Rather than go with our generic talk title suggestion, Jack came back with the idea of calling their talk “I was hungry and thirsty …”. Our hearts leapt. Not only was it game on, but Jack was clearly engaging wholeheartedly with the festival context too, choosing a title that would sit well with our core community. Added to which, Jack said a panel would be OK, too. Even one with the formidable Peter Oborne already booked in!"

"Pausing to sing a Jackie Oates song at one point, Jack drew to a close and received the first of their standing ovations – before opening up for questions. A session in which the miraculous happened."

Oh sorry, wrong Oates

 

[KebabGirl]

View attachment 1400163

A) No, you didn't. You called him disingenuous.
B) No, it didn't. It ended normally.
C) That piece was ages ago.
D) duck off

I know I'm behind, but told you so!! Or Jack has read my post in the hope I type this...

Still spouting pre GSCE politics and thinking you are radical? duck off, that was 18 months ago and you still haven't moved on from it. At least the tweet wasn't deleted, eh

 

[DinosaurSenior]

Babe, same x

Me-rail below
When I'm in places like Subway I practice saying my order over and over in my head as I find situations like that very stressful. I also pray the staff don't ask me any unexpected questions that will throw me off.

Babe same. I have been to one once, and didn't understand how it worked and couldn't answer all the questions, and the guy was grumpy so I never went back.

 

[Ostapbender]

That description of Jack not answering the festival organisers could have been written about the guy I just worked with.

You can't plan anything with them. And the amount of work needed just to help them to do the absolute bare minimum.......is not worth it.

A complete nightmare I still haven't recovered from

You couldn't pay me to have anything to do with her.

"It was clear that Jack was overwhelmed" lol
eta: I tried to think of a joke but I'm too tired, send brainos. On the other hand, their concluding that Jack was overwhelmed by her blanking them is pretty funny

 

[WeHadFunRight]

Babe same. I have been to one once, and didn't understand how it worked and couldn't answer all the questions, and the guy was grumpy so I never went back.

Spoiler: Subway-rail

I take my husband with me, stand behind him sheepishly and make him give my order

 

[GrannyOgg]

Excuse me but what the duck is a horn-clod? Only I think it's a candidate for the Jacktionary and google is very insistent that I mean Joseph Horn Cloud.

I think she may have meant horn dog but who knows.

 

[NellieBoo]

Babe same. I have been to one once, and didn't understand how it worked and couldn't answer all the questions, and the guy was grumpy so I never went back.

Same happened to me. I'm not that fussed really, I suppose, as I usually take my lunch to work. But I occasionally buy my lunch and have to walk past Subway and Greggs. I always go to Greggs because I can't understand it or hear like the young uns do. And it's really busy in this particular Subway so the salad bar is always very fresh .

I'm almost certain there was a reddit/tiktok (?) post where some kind person who worked at Subway, talked someone through the ordering process?

 

[Phillipa78]

I'm so here for the Iqbal merch!! I'm going to try and think of a punchy design along the lines of the ones people made for Deidre Barlow "free the Weatherfield one!" Imagine trying to explain it to people?! We could spot fellow Frauen und Herren in the wild... Also, Jackie could kick our shins while we thanked her for her service. We could donate the money to a charity, so people could get on board with a turd themed tee.

I've not kept up well today, but I gather the main character in her own universe is both under the weather and all over twitter.

 

[DinosaurSenior]

Wait....the description of Greenbelt Jack was real!?

I thought it was a Cabal Concoction! Ugh she's such a gigantic cringe.

Also...the thought of the sound of a sign being tapped gives me shudders. There was a guy on the bus the this morning counting a huge wad of banknotes and the sound of it was giving me raaaaaage!!!!!

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

How has she already spent all the Patreon cash? This is for paypigs to top up the tip jar and nothing else.

 

[Orphan_Black]

How has she already spent all the Patreon cash? This is for paypigs to top up the tip jar and nothing else.

View attachment 1400473

She's been grunking then.

Hi Jack, no one believes your malady lies nor need your hot takes on the Boris issue. Go away.