Jack Monroe #329 Pooroboros

[NellieBoo]

Omg the coat Bowie wears….. and that moment as he walks onto the stage and does Wild is the Wind We often watch that it’s wonderful

Yes! The Brocade? Coat. So, so gorgeous. I David.

 

[Pavlova]

And now I can’t get the tune of Electric Avenue out of my head “Potatoes 2, electric boogaloo”

Aww don't, I'll have an earworm for days ...
Morning all
All bets are ON/OFF for the Glasto appearance in about an hour. I've been hooting at your festival memories x

 

[Pavlova]

Orwell said it well.

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Oh fuck. I’m going to give her ideas aren’t I? It’ll be the Orwell index of tastiness next.

It'll be larks tongues on toast all round. Hurrah hurrah and then they all clapped Jacksie.
Sorry dear ninnies, I am feeling rather spicy tonight.

 

[Missmopps]

LP is also a lesbian who is married to a man.

Where is the eye roll reaction emoji when we need it ?

 

[Captainmouse]

A bit late to the party, but going back to the tattoos - I'm sure I saw a cotton reel in one photo. I think on the back of her arm, so you don't see it very often. It stuck in my memory because I remember wondering why on earth someone would get a tattoo of a cotton reel! But maybe there's some hidden symbolism, and I'm about to be enlightened by more knowledgeable Frauen.

More than likely she flipped thru the book and said, that one, that one, and that one

 

[NeoCortex]

I have never voted for the Conservatives and never will, I think the current government is a total shower but the edgy ‘fuck the tories’ thing, coming from middle class posers at a ££££ festival is so cringe. Peak Jack energy though. Where is she? lol

Shes at home making brambly cutesie pics of her flufflepumph

 

[NeoCortex]

I don't understand why she keeps calling it a bungalow?
I keep forgetting to ask on here!
Ref the subtotal on receipts, this is a thing you can ask for at the till, I have a numbers dyscalcula type thing and you can ask them to subtotal every now and then as it goes through the till to make sure you stay within your budget

But don't you remember when when she struggled upstairs to sort the wibbly wi-fi and routery mouse combo so her and SB could watch unrated Robocop together?

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

#jackwatch

Jack is there in Zarah form then. What other pearls of wisdom has she got? Tomorrow is Monday?

 

[jordishaw]

It’ll be worse. Severe. Traumatic, obvs

Complex even.

 

[MistyWindows]

Bubble Buddy Louisa Compton was 100% in the corner on the computer, hidden by the tube.

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In my opinion, that looks like she’s had fillers, a LOT of it (done badly) and then has had a bad reaction/not looked after the punchers during healing etc, until they’re healed you certainly shouldn’t be stuffing your gob with any kind of spicy food let alone crisps.
And that was her ‘genus’ way of covering up the fact that she can’t afford them
(I’ve had them before, the smallest amount you can have and I saved up for months, they PRICEY)

Sorry if I’m stating the obvious!

Also that finger nail?!

 

[Readingismyhobby]

When I was growing up mum used to get worse. Sterilised milk in long tall bottles with beer bottle caps, suppose that might be what uht milk is today? And st Ivel Five pints milk powder! Eugh, still better than just water on your weetabix.

I hated sterilised milk, powdered milk is also gross. My grampy used to have condensed milk in his tea.

 

[Captainmouse]

So Jack couldn't get an weekend puppy sitter for a new and untrained puppy then? What a surprise.

Yeah everybody wants to spend the weekend cleaning up after somebody else’s dog.

 

[StillLucilleBluth]

Can you imagine if she did Instagram stories all the time? In fact, I’m surprised she doesn’t - or has she in the past and stopped for some reason?

 

[NellieBoo]

Dear Jack,

I hope you are well. Did you get my last email? If so, sorry for the abrupt tone. I wonder if some wires were crossed...

I hear you didn’t appear at the Glastonbury Festival – what a shame. But all is not lost. Why? I'll tell you...

I was looking up some old videos on Youtube earlier while Maureen was at the wellness centre (she is having some problems with her bunions) and found a video of you singing with Billy Bragg. Can’t believe no one liked or commented on it, I personally found it very powerful. I’ve always said you had a set of pipes on you, and I have to say that seeing you up there moved something in me, and not just a sense of pride. You know I’m a hippie at heart, something that I always felt you really understood.

Your happy little face on stage brought back some good memories… Remember the Lidl car park after 8pm?! Cleaning cupboard at Southend Golf Club? I sometimes wish you’d sing Celine Dion for me again…!

Anyway, I meant to say that Maureen is out on Friday afternoons with her nudist painting club, so if you wanted to pop round you’re welcome to do so… I've got a little arrangement with the neighbour, you're welcome to pitch in with us. Free love!

Toot toot,

Harold

God Almighty .

 

[Skyfall]

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Deleted.

She has been-
OH saw the light and got outta jail.
Bet his family had a word as he’s not in SM.
Or he heard her screaming ovaries
Or he didn’t think she would be able to look after a dog having seen her with SB

 

[definitelynotvlad]

She's very quiet. She must be out getting her nightmeat.

This made me hoot!

 

[Captainmouse]

Yes, JM is fucking ray of sunshine in a bleak world.

FTFY
Yes, JM is fucking bleak In a ray of sunshine

 

[Cack Conroe]

What time does she have to be there? There's an 8.51 leaving Paddington direct to Castle Cary getting in at 10.24 and there's a free shuttle bus from Castle Cary to the festival.

She’s on at 12 so I’d imagine she ought to be there at least an hour before. But knowing Jack, 15 minutes will do.

 

[LennyBriscoe]

Exactly! UHT milk is standard here, far more readily available than fresh (which most supermarkets don't stock, or if they do, they will have about 5 bottles out at the bottom of a cabinet - it's clearly not a big seller).

If you're a tea/coffee drinker, you might not want UHT (I guess? I don't drink either!) but you can use it in smoothies, and it's great for baking or cooking. Not everyone lives rurally and has easy access to stallions, so UHT milk is a good option for béchamel, for example.

All information that would be useful from a literal food expert, no?

BTW who the fuck does a 5-step shopping list without a meal plan? She's planning to batch cook this weekend, but has no idea what she's batch cooking? Train the dog to do the groceries, Jack, she'll do a better job than you!

I believe she’s made a “ruff” list already

 

[fairylights2000]

That was her fantasy list wasn’t it? Not on the final one.

Not gonna lie I couldn't follow the different lists