Jack Monroe #329 Pooroboros

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Yesterday was black bin bag day in the Pavlova household. So there I am, with the roll of bags...
And there was not one single seam. So I ended up with the entire roll as one, like the world's largest domestic windsock. It was a real wtf moment. Dear hearts, I hooted (still am)..
#Aldi #epicfail #elevenerifeSocks
 
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I don’t think Ambridge fraus should be worried about Cack opening the fete, it would ruin her narrative that the beeb won’t touch her with a barge pole because she won’t wear a petticoat.
 
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I was walking through Soho years ago and my lighter broke. A very hot, well dressed man walked passed smoking so I said "excuse me" and he did a sort of good natured eye roll and came over, with a very yes it's me, aren't I lovely kind of smile. I asked him for a light, used it, thanked him, gave it back and he just stood there with a strange expectant air about him. He looked a bit crestfallen when I just walked off.
This must be twenty years ago and to this day I have no idea who that man was.
 
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I remember someone querying that, and she said she'd switched to alternatives and would do a post about it...

I'm sure we'll get an update when she hits menopause or something.
 
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The Laurie Penny thing, this is the individual that apparently looks just like Jack, behaves similarly to Jack and people confuse them with one another... It would be Peak Jack to fancy someone that is a complete reflection of herself, no?

Morning wonderful Anonymous Dickwads
 
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At least they wouldn't be spoiling another couple. What are Laurie's nails like?
 
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Morning chaps! I woke up quite early today, so we did an impromptu trip to Lidl before it got mad. Back home and unpacked by 9.30. I roughly used the Sainsburys basket I update through the week - take off anything I bought at Lidl, and decide when to get the remaining cat food etc delivered from sauna is. Very minimal effort. No rainforests destroyed.

ANYWAY. Laurie Penny, her bestie. Dog namesake, right? She who actually did the dirrrty deed that Jack was accused of. Jack was so horrified she had to sue KH over it? AND YET, perfectly happy to be friends with LP? Almost as if she wasn’t that offended at all. Peculiar.
 
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SB, who is now 12, no longer has agency over his own decisions because she sneakily pours UHT into a glass milk bottle?

I won't bother picking apart the rest of the tweet.



Looks like last night's UHT tweet was deleted:
 
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My autistic children fucking hate slop! Not that i would ever make it for them. Soup is a non starter. It has to be safe, largely beige foods, mot touching. Every time they try some new I could cry tears of joy. Jack is an awful liar.
 
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I don’t think LP actually desecrated a war memorial. But she defended the person who did and said it was justified because ‘fuck the tories’ and all the usual arguments that make me embarrassed to be a leftie. She got a lot of shit from it on Twitter, and then claimed it was OK because her grandma got a George’s Cross, which was bollocks. Her grandma did get some sort of medal, but not a George’s Cross. Anyway, yeah I can’t think of a more terrible and perfect partner for Jack.
 
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She'd never be able to access a home like that now as a single self-employed person with a crap credit record and owing three years of taxes. She was only able to at the time because of L's job and income.
So once again used someone else to get what she wanted. I doubt it was LJC's first choice of where to live.

Jack is a user, pure and simple. Though she is far from pure, and I'll let you decide whether she's simple or not!
 
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My autistic children fucking hate slop! Not that i would ever make it for them. Soup is a non starter. It has to be safe, largely beige foods, mot touching. Every time they try some new I could cry tears of joy. Jack is an awful liar.
My eldest has autism and there’s no way he’d ever cook or eat anything by Jack. For starters, her recipes are way too confusing with all that waffle at the beginning and overly complicated instructions. I could see him looking at that page of words and just being like ‘err, no!’ He also hates anything with a sloppy texture and anything she cooks is all mixed together, which would be a big no for pretty much all the kids I know who have sensory issues.

Love the anecdote about the doctor saying she has to eat fish because of her arthritis. I’m sure the actual conversation was along the lines of ‘you’re slightly deficient in X which most people get from oily fish’ and Jack took that as a green light to gobble down bollock sausages daily.
 
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Lol at her comment she doesn't have a meal plan yet. She wants congratulations for doing a shop for less than £20 with no plan or thought to how practical that shop will be for the purpose of actually making meals ? I mean she may as well just buy £20 worth of wagon wheels ! Great going hope that's a tip in the new book
 
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