Jack Monroe #315 The man from the mortgage broker, he say No

[Thank(space)you]

Well done to @Shimmering for the thread title suggestion, with 81 likes. You win first pick from Jack's next big sale!

In the last thread:

Jack claims she spends 30 minutes (10% of her day) on twitter a day, which must be true as she is actually autistic & cannot lie. The canal did some granular big maths and found this to be an impossibility due to not enough hours in the day; but this is Jack maths & Jack time.

ETA Jack tweeted and deleted having SB be her social media manager/admin to earn some pocket money, despite the fact twitter is a hellscape & she regularly receives death threats on there.

Jack's so un bothered about criticism, she one handedly replies whilst on the crapper, with a callous where her heart should be. Except for when she's threatening libel, name checking herself & creating pile ons. Have a nice day PAL

Jack had a very important meeting which was for SB & she couldn't tell anyone because WHY CANT I HAVE NICE THINGS OKAY. 2 days later it was revealed to be a practice run for applying for a mortgage. Jack is planning to downsize for 2 years & save for a mortgage for a £300K property. Squigs are testing the water to crowd fund it for her, as she's such a smol pixie who rents.

Jack, the biggest LFC fan ever, didn't mention the kickyball this weekend, despite it being a big weekend for her team.

More book edits being done, and the canal noticed her garlic jam req recipe is actually a complete copy of her previous work; to the point it's been printed from her website.

The canal did a deep dive on fb & discovered a coffee morning for mummies and daddies hosted by Jack during the poverty. We also looked at her gleeful big sale advertising on fb from the poverty. Jack was so worried about her obsessive stalker she put her address & mobile number on fb.

 

[Captainmouse]

Why doesn’t she get sb to post her patreon postcards out?

 

[Hayze2384]

As I have said I am new to these threads. I am catching up as quickly as my BUSY time will allow. I did not realise just how contradictory JM's stories were...... she should be referred to as Schrodinger's Jack! (I am sure one of you would have already coined this )

 

[Thank(space)you]

As I have said I am new to these threads. I am catching up as quickly as my BUSY time will allow. I did not realise just how contradictory JM's stories were...... she should be referred to as Schrodinger's Jack! (I am sure one of you would have already coined this )

I think that may have been a thread title at one point

 

[MaineCoonMama]

What's the sitrep on the box? At least tweet a quick 'cheers' and say what it is so I can move on with my life.

 

[purpleindigo]

Saw a book ad for the pixie today #jackenomics

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Just wanted to bring this post forward from the last thread, the single person discount is based on the adults living in the property only, as children are non earners and not responsible for CT. So she's either lying, repaying a debt which will follow her to any other property she goes to anyway, or she's a numpty and been paying full whack #counciltaxtruther.


Morning all

 

[Tittykitty]

Found the perfect 3 bed, sea facing, bungalow for her

 

[Hackastory]

Just wanted to bring this post forward from the last thread, the single person discount is based on the adults living in the property only, as children are non earners and not responsible for CT. So she's either lying, repaying a debt which will follow her to any other property she goes to anyway, or she's a numpty and been paying full whack #counciltaxtruther.


Morning all

I thought she had a lodger for a while last year? I may be misremembering, but im sure her £20 shops were for 2 adults and one child at one point. I remember because that was before I discovered these threads and had to keep my incredulence to myself

 

[ChickenPorridge]

I remain astounded at her Facebook advertisement for the sale of her belongings in 2012 as seen on the last thread. I always knew there were press there (like, what?) but the way it was advertised and showboated like that! It seems it was nothing more than a publicity stunt. And how does all the Facebooking, making digi sale flyers etc, tie in with her writing her first book on a napkin and a Nokia 3310? She seems more than familiar with Big Tech, or did she have people doing that sort of stuff for her? If so, mad that they could help her out with that sort of thing, but not buy her an extra pot of Jam for her starving child.

 

[Clarends]

Message from someone who doesn't get paid for giving out budgeting advice to someone who does.

Unless Jack learns manage her outgoings her financial problems will never go away. Mortgage comes before horrid hats same as rent does.

 

[Bumbear]

@colouredlines can we add the advert and the FB post for the yard sale to the wiki from last thread for the 2011 timeline? Plus the message where she's inviting people round for coffee right over the top of the poverty. I would do it but not sure how to link to screenshots rather than links (because I am an idiot). Great finds!

 

[colouredlines]

I feel that we haven't given this tweet the attention it deserves:

The implication being that a pre-ordered book makes a suitable Xmas present? That is the saddest festive season since the tinned mandarin and veg peel stuffing.

Although on second thoughts, if a loved one does proudly present you with a note reading IOU one slop manual - Santa, you have a couple of months to cut them out of your life, I suppose?

@colouredlines can we add the advert and the FB post for the yard sale to the wiki from last thread for the 2011 timeline? Plus the message where she's inviting people round for coffee right over the top of the poverty. I would do it but not sure how to link to screenshots rather than links (because I am an idiot). Great finds!

I am not a wiki master but will give it a go (unless someone else who's better at wiki-ing can? ).

 

[Django]

Found the perfect 3 bed, sea facing, bungalow for her

This is perfect for the woman who wore a stab vest to Glastonbury!

 

[ChickenPorridge]

Another head scratcher is her go-to explanation that "nobody knew, I didn't tell anybody". Isn't advertising online that you're selling all your tit a fairly dead giveaway that times are indeed very hard? Mum is commenting don't sell your camera darling but not inviting you and kiddo round for tea?

 

[Flivver]

I’ve been pondering the Big Sale.

She has said numerous times that she was too ashamed to tell her loving and supportive family about The Poverty yet there’s Mammy giving helpful advice…

Thing is about the internet, once info is out there, it stays there. Makes it hard for those who are disingenuous about their past to retell their story (or stories).

Edit: while I was ponderin’ dear heart @ChickenPorridge was thinking along similar lines.

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Another head scratcher is her go-to explanation that "nobody knew, I didn't tell anybody". Isn't advertising online that you're selling all your tit a fairly dead giveaway that times are indeed very hard? Mum is commenting don't sell your camera darling but not inviting you and kiddo round for tea?

Yes that's something else that doesn't add up. We can see she was quite open on FB about why she's selling all her belongings, and even the bloody media were involved. None of it looks like someone that was ashamed and wanting to hide her financial situation from everyone. It's all bullshit .

 

[margaretta]

Thanks to @Thank(space)you for starting the thread and congratulations to @Shimmering for the thread title.

If she is aiming for a £300k mortgage in two years, haven’t house prices gone up at least 14% in the last year, meaning she needs to aim for at least £342,000 to try and keep up, or as @Tittykitty suggested, head to Jaywick.
Better get that tip jar rattling.

 

[Penelope_Ghent]

I feel that we haven't given this tweet the attention it deserves:

View attachment 1304609

The implication being that a pre-ordered book makes a suitable Xmas present? That is the saddest festive season since the tinned mandarin and veg peel stuffing.

Although on second thoughts, if a loved one does proudly present you with a note reading IOU one slop manual - Santa, you have a couple of months to cut them out of your life, I suppose?



I am not a wiki master but will give it a go (unless someone else who's better at wiki-ing can? ).

Happy Christmas! Here’s the worlds most depressing book. One for the office secret Santa there…

 

[Yel]

So she uses pickled garlic for bad days when she can't peel a clove

Pickled garlic is a totally different product, it's pretty mild - Lidl sell it during Spanish week. I munch though a whole jar while intermittent fasting to keep within calories .

An actual alternative would be the garlic paste. But if peeling it was an issue but you were still cooking you'd just use a garlic press as you don't need to peel and arms or legs could press it. I can't believe for years I didn't have a garlic press and was wasting time peeling, always getting garlic fingers and garlic chopboard. Truly revolutionary!

It's the lies over pointless insignificant things that baffle me the most.

The dodgy advice to mix oil and water to pickle garlic aka botulism is strange because if she's going to lie about something she does why doesn't she spend a minute to Google and at least give accurate and safe information?