Jack Monroe #311 Please consider the environment before printing this thread

[Feck]

This is all because Lozza etc al. called her bluff and then she saw a picture if JO'S glorious house isn't it?

I think you absolutely do need to go to ground for a bit, hon. Because all of this *waves at everything* really is exhausting. And I'm only spectating.

Also, I think the constant toothache is probably karma. All that poisonous bile you spew is rotting you from the inside out. Toot toot.

 

[Terrible]

I’m hoping it’s a hungry stegosaurus.

I can’t being doing with her today. I hope her rabid fans enjoy her all day Twitter rants and tip her accordingly. Maybe she can save her penny-oes up and buy herself a pleasant personality.

PS - careful with that punchbag Jack, you’ve got arthritic hands. REMEMBER YOUR LIES!

 

[Dogmuck]

Aww crumbling teeth poetry -
I woke up like a rocket
My crumbling teeth
Lay there like a seashell that’s been smashed up in a forgotten coat pocket

 

[Veronicaaa]

She's been really rattled lately, hasn't she? The cost of living crisis has exposed just how useless and hypocritical her whole 'body of work is' and she's desperately trying to retcon it in real time, which is why she doesn't do recipes any more and is trying to rebrand herself as some sort of expert data analyst / statistician / serious political commentator. It's pretty pathetic.

 

[Dogmuck]

Train chaos fraus - she’s on a train toot toot

More ouchy mouth misery

She’s been listening to someone’s music for 25 minutes on a train but only 30 minutes ago she was gargling her med and salt shot

 

[MarthaFarkus]

Ah duck her, can’t be arsed with another day of her sniping. I had a lovely day at the kickyball yesterday (my team won 4-1) and I’m at work today so I’m probs not going to grunk when I get home. Kudos to the fraus and herrs who stick with this day in, day out, she’s so ridiculously draining isn’t she?

 

[Veronicaaa]

Last tweet is a pretty good description of the experience of looking at her twitter timeline.

 

[Eurgh]

Sweet Jesus she’s up and she’s on one.

View attachment 1287298

NOT THAT YOU HAVEN’T TRIED YOUR HARDEST JACK!

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

The toothache is to get out of that phone call with that guy isn’t it?

 

[Bell'un]

If (insert name) has this under control I'm stepping away.
Cue exit from social interaction/any arguments/pending work.
Cue fawning begging for return/begging for person to look after self.

Not saying this is happening here, but it was the pattern with person we had at work. It was exhausting for everyone.

 

[Dogmuck]

When she uses the word literal here is it the same as when she used literally in reference to her starving? Is her dentist a literal Angel

 

[Clarends]

Jack’s argument that junk food should not be taxed so that poor people can eat it during the cost of living crisis exactly aligns with the Tory Government reason for not implementing the tax at this time.

She is using Tory talking points against THAT MAN.

secret tory

Jack siding with Torys?
Just when you think her knickers can't get any more in a twist.
Bring it on.

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

Absolute class. Jack could never. She ain’t winning that Observer award with TK on the panel.

 

[BlendedSlop]

What the duck? I get that toothache is the worst, but whenever I've had it I've managed to avoid chomping bits out of my own face. Between this and all the howling and clawing, she makes herself sound like a wild animal.

 

[Veronicaaa]

A couple of things from her likes last night.
She still seems to think Jamie Oliver 'stole' her idea for a pandemic show.

Heaven forfend she "rent somewhere like common folks"

 

[holliebollie]

We know she’s probably lying but I once had half a tooth crumble (a trumble?) when I munched on a sandwich. It was apparently normal looking on the outside and never showed any signs but inside was as crumbly as a Flake. Must have been my three years of energy drinks habit living in poverty while at uni.
Things she blames her teeth on:
No braces when younger- parents’ fault.
Alcohol addiction- forgets to brush? Or the acid in sugary drinks?
Autism- sensory issues
ADHD puppy brain- forgets to brush them
Living in poverty- general poor diet high in sugar. Also had to sell her toothbrush with the lightbulbs for £0.00002

 

[HotesTilaire]

Thanks for new thread @colouredlines

Anyone else spot the 'Emperor's new clothes' bit in her latest stream of nonsense? Really reminded me of my own words here about what she does to all of Twitter. But I don't think Jack understood the reference (a surprise I know because she's so intelligent) and used it incorrectly. No idea what she was getting at but as always, there were WORDS.

Talking about myself like a ninny, but she misquoted my “up the wooden hills, to Bedfordshire” line in that lot. I wonder who else feels “seen”?

 

[Shimmering]

What the duck? I get that toothache is the worst, but whenever I've had it I've managed to avoid chomping bits out of my own face. Between this and all the howling and clawing, she makes herself sound like a wild animal.

That's because, unlike Jack, you didn't have the toothachiest toothache that ever toothached.

You will never understand the torment she experiences.

 

[Veronicaaa]

View attachment 1287479

Absolute class. Jack could never. She ain’t winning that Observer award with TK on the panel.

So this is who / what she's witching about? Now Tom Kerridge is stealing her idea just like Jamie did? And he's one of those patronising millionaires all up in her niche? Wow way to burn every bridge possible Jack luv.

 

[Dogmuck]

Praying earphone train person has shin pads on