Jack Monroe #301 Jack Monroe Cheap and Cheerless

[Powershower]

She’s too coarse for the BBC so they put her on their flagship daytime show in the middle of the pandemic…okay.
Hey Miss Munroe we can’t have you on the BBC, except those 2 weeks you were. Oh and everyone else who appeared on the programme we will invite back.

also everyone took doggy bags home (has anyone ever done that from someone’s house) so she cooked pork for 20 then? So very very poor isn’t she.

It’s okay, I know the answer.

The Food Foundation reported that 7.3 million people in the UK have had smaller meals, missed meals or not eaten for a whole day. Up 57% Jan-April 2022 and Jack is gleefully posting about cooking enough pork, crackling, sides and pudding for 10+ leftovers. To paraphrase Allegra, bit bleeping gauche.
To then have the temerity to tweet “we” and “us” when talking about food insecurity is disgusting. Read the room Jack!!!

I’ve never been so close to handing in my tattle membership!!

POOR PEOPLE CAN HAVE NICE THINGS JACK BUT YOU ARE NOT POOR

Vial vial woman

 

[maytoseptember]

I think this is definite confirmation from our Jacksie that OH is an older male….

Of course they’re older, it’s the only relationship dynamic Jack knows

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

I’m an actual recovering alcoholic who’s also actually a lesbian*, and I slightly know a guy who very briefly dated JM years ago, before she started saying she was gay. For some time Jack’s endless attempts to make herself more interesting have been a source of low-key amused fascination. Thank you for the thread and the previous ones.

*To be fair, I can’t remember what gender and sexuality Jack has most recently claimed to have, perhaps the wheel has spun around again since I started typing this post??

For me it was easy to tell the OH was a bloke because Jack wouldn’t use any pronouns at all about him. Kind of the reverse of the more traditional days when a person would play pronoun games to avoid coming out; people who claim a certain sexuality for the status rep will play a lot of games to avoid going back in once they’re in a straight relationship. In no way is this disparaging of bisexual and sexually fluid people more generally by the way, it’s all cool — only meant as a comment on attention-seekers like JM and JM’s ilk.

BIB for thread title nomination

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Of course they’re older, it’s the only relationship dynamic Jack knows

I find that interesting. She seems to have a mummy daddy complex. I'm still leaning towards OH being an imaginary friend for Louisa's benefit. Go on Jack prove us wrong.

 

[Onestorytoomany]

omg is there any non-identifying tea on what a terror she is? I imagine she leaves her partners dried out husks. Hence the fury at LJC’s extreme glow-up.

I have never seen anyone glow up after a relationship as much as L. She looks amazing, whereas before she always looked stressed and fed up!

 

[Wooh]

I’m an actual recovering alcoholic who’s also actually a lesbian*, and I slightly know a guy who very briefly dated JM years ago, before she started saying she was gay. For some time Jack’s endless attempts to make herself more interesting have been a source of low-key amused fascination. Thank you for the thread and the previous ones.

*To be fair, I can’t remember what gender and sexuality Jack has most recently claimed to have, perhaps the wheel has spun around again since I started typing this post??

For me it was easy to tell the OH was a bloke because Jack wouldn’t use any pronouns at all about him. Kind of the reverse of the more traditional days when a person would play pronoun games to avoid coming out; people who claim a certain sexuality for the status rep will play a lot of games to avoid going back in once they’re in a straight relationship. In no way is this disparaging of bisexual and sexually fluid people more generally by the way, it’s all cool — only meant as a comment on attention-seekers like JM and JM’s ilk.

I always think of "Chasing Amy" when Jack does this. One of Amy's group of pretty exclusively lesbian women says, "Why are we playing the pronoun game?"

 

[LavaFlake]

She usually calls her female partners "Mrs J" so I think it's unlikely that OH is female on this basis.

"Mrs J" honestly makes me cringe so hard my bum almost inverts. It's so tragic.

 

[Wooh]

She usually calls her female partners "Mrs J" so I think it's unlikely that OH is female on this basis.

Anyone calling me "Mrs My Initial" would very soon find one half of their condescending temerity outside and the OH in the bin

 

[Onestorytoomany]

Anyone calling me "Mrs My Initial" would very soon find one half of their condescending temerity outside and the OH in the bin

It's very old fashioned and almost line trying to be the dominant one in the relationship.

I remember my mum used to get letters from the bank with mum's title, my dad's intial and their joint surname.

 

[Readingismyhobby]

Spoiler: “twin ramble”

My sisters are identical twins. Our Grandmother still cannot tell them apart, and not even in their teens when one bleached her hair to white blonde and the other dyed hers black.

To me, they look completely different, even now they’re both back to natural hair colour and when dressed identical (which family members still insist on doing to them, particularly for weddings - they’ve been bridesmaids a thousand times, otherwise they have entirely different styles).

They sound different, have different speech patterns, have different mannerisms. I can tell them apart when their backs are to me, by their voices. The only other person that can do that is our mother.

Spoiler: “naked autism kids”

My middle child would walk around in shorts and a vest top, barefoot 24/7 if I let her, even in the dead of winter, even outside. She doesn’t feel the cold at all, and has an extraordinarily high pain threshold.

Some kids have almost zero impulse control - my Dads first cousins daughter is on the barely speaks/interacts part of the spectrum, is now an adult in a supported independent living complex and was very much like your husbands relative as a child.

nobody gets more annoyed at my ADHD symptoms than I do. I call it “Pissing Myself Off Disorder”

Spoiler: ”autism and schools”

Middle kid is allowed to wear compression leggings and trainers at school. She wears the usual polo t shirt, though. Secondary starts this September and I’m terrified - she cannot stand the stiff, formal shirts (despite me trying this year) and as for formal shoes? She wears Doc Martens boots, and secondary do not allow boots. She’s allowed fidget toys, to leave the classroom to “shake her sillies off”

My eldest kid is there now and has been for 3 years, and they are spectacularly bleeping awful with ND kids, but fantastic for the “gifted” kids like my eldest (who is also probably ND but in a less debilitating way)

I am already That Mother with that school due to their deeply misogynistic rules (eg boys can wear tight trousers but girls cannot).

My son is autistic, dyslexic and dyspraxic. The only way I made any progress in meetings with the SENCO at High school) was when I requested minutes (provided for me to approve or not). That way I had proof they were going to take an action, plus a time for the action. Unfortunately I only did this during the later years at High school. Would the Disability Discrimination Act be relevant?
I hope this idea may help you

 

[Wooh]

Yes, isn't "Mrs" a throwback to "wife of"? And by further retro extension, an indicator a Mrs is property of? Mr and Mrs Mark Antony, for example

 

[Pocahontas]

I said ages ago (and this reference is perhaps a little dated - praise beans and all that) that she should just call them all OfJack.

Honestly couldn’t give two hoots about your love life, Jack, if you’re reading this. I just feel embarrassed for you and them that you think nuzzling the jolly green giant’s sibling’s midriff in front of your ‘father-in-law’ is a hootworthy anecdote.

 

[SkippyDoo]

omg is there any non-identifying tea on what a terror she is? I imagine she leaves her partners dried out husks. Hence the fury at LJC’s extreme glow-up.

I don’t have too much very interesting gossip alas, but I took slight notice because it seemed like not very long after this Jack was claiming to be the biggest gay who’d ever gayed or whatever and I realized it was the same woman. As a big old gay myself, it can be somewhat interesting who will insist that they have a certain sexuality, even if the facts of their life point away from that.

The bloke in question was aware she liked women, but certainly under the (understandable) impression that she liked men too at the time they dated. Of course, some gay women do date men before they come out or fully figure things out, fair enough, and when they broke things off, the guy seemed to be taking things at face value that she had decided she in fact preferred women, and it wasn’t acrimonious or anything, but he did still seem a little confused by it. It didn’t quite make sense to him, from what he knew of her. He was pretty sure himself that she was bi, but of course it wasn’t for him to say. That was firmly the impression he had got. Always been my impression watching from afar FWIW.

I always think of "Chasing Amy" when Jack does this. One of Amy's group of pretty exclusively lesbian women says, "Why are we playing the pronoun game?"

Haha oh yes indeed. There are lots of questionable things about that film but that scene is pretty amusing, I must say. Exactly what Jack has been doing IMO.

 

[Lyricallie]

Posting from the past here so sorry if this falls in the middle of a chaos. But wanted to tell you all about a new car game I made up with my husband. I read out the ingredient list of her recipes and get mr lyrical to guess what the meal is. Then if he doesn't get it I read the steps and then when he gives up I tell him the answer. Readers, his success rate was less than 15%.

I also made him watch the green linguine and lasagna videos today. He was horrified and now wants to go make a proper lasagna.

Lastly, that MN thread from the thread 300 is gold and I'm highly enjoying it as DKL is what brought me to the cabal.

Thank you and back to your scheduled mithering

 

[Whiffy McBiffy]

Also, ExMIL makes an amazing pasta dish which is just simmered broccoli, blend it, then sling it in a pan with olive oil and garlic, mix it with the pasta and as much Parmesan as you want. It’s pence and is genuinely really nice.

Lovely stuff. There's a guy on YouTube called Josh Weissman and his channel is BRILLIANT. He does three different pastas (onion/butter/tomato, Alfredo and garlic/oil) which are simply adorable, I've literally not bought bottled sauce since discovering him. Same goes for his chow mein, cheap as chips and twice as nice as the takeaway. I even managed to wean my daughter off KFC/McDonalds because his burger and chicken recipes are so good.

I don't have any personal beef with Jack, I just find her recipes absolutely depressing and her style leaves a lot to be desired. To me cooking is about getting creative and having some fun, opening tins of grey-brown mush and swirling them together seems somewhat antithetical to that.

Furthermore, I spent my entire 20s knocking about with people on the poverty line, and every single one of them cooked proper meals. In fact to this day I don't think I've ever seen anyone open a tin of potatoes when you can buy a bag of them for the same price.

Furthermore, I think Jack would run in to a lot less scrutiny/controversy if she kept quieter about certain elements of her life that contradict the Ken Loach narrative that she's trying to paint. People on the poverty line don't go swanning round Glastonbury festival or drink a bottle of whiskey every night

 

[Veronicaaa]

Posting from the past here so sorry if this falls in the middle of a chaos. But wanted to tell you all about a new car game I made up with my husband. I read out the ingredient list of her recipes and get mr lyrical to guess what the meal is. Then if he doesn't get it I read the steps and then when he gives up I tell him the answer. Readers, his success rate was less than 15%.

I also made him watch the green linguine and lasagna videos today. He was horrified and now wants to go make a proper lasagna.

Lastly, that MN thread from the thread 300 is gold and I'm highly enjoying it as DKL is what brought me to the cabal.

Thank you and back to your scheduled mithering

Speaking of mumsnet threads, the one about tattle is still up and it has LOADS of references to Jack's shadiness

 

[JombleWomble]

oh, she's awake and the squigs have noticed the soil pocket

View attachment 1255560

also more on "cheffy" ingredients

View attachment 1255563

She's so snide about other cooks' work. It makes her sound like a jealous child. It wouldn't surprise me if this rudeness is why some companies won't work with her- she's absolutely the type who hears "you're a bit too brash to fit our brand" as something about her accent and tattoos instead of a reference to how rude and aggressive she is.

 

[Captainmouse]

Posting from the past here so sorry if this falls in the middle of a chaos. But wanted to tell you all about a new car game I made up with my husband. I read out the ingredient list of her recipes and get mr lyrical to guess what the meal is. Then if he doesn't get it I read the steps and then when he gives up I tell him the answer. Readers, his success rate was less than 15%.

I also made him watch the green linguine and lasagna videos today. He was horrified and now wants to go make a proper lasagna.

Lastly, that MN thread from the thread 300 is gold and I'm highly enjoying it as DKL is what brought me to the cabal.

Thank you and back to your scheduled mithering

Love a bit of scheduled mithering

 

[Veronicaaa]

She's so snide about other cooks' work. It makes her sound like a jealous child. It wouldn't surprise me if this rudeness is why some companies won't work with her- she's absolutely the type who hears "you're a bit too brash to fit our brand" as something about her accent and tattoos instead of a reference to how rude and aggressive she is.

She equates rudeness with being 'coarse and common' so this checks out.

 

[Onestorytoomany]

Lovely stuff. There's a guy on YouTube called Josh Weissman and his channel is BRILLIANT. He does three different pastas (onion/butter/tomato, Alfredo and garlic/oil) which are simply adorable, I've literally not bought bottled sauce since discovering him. Same goes for his chow mein, cheap as chips and twice as nice as the takeaway. I even managed to wean my daughter off KFC/McDonalds because his burger and chicken recipes are so good.

I don't have any personal beef with Jack, I just find her recipes absolutely depressing and her style leaves a lot to be desired. To me cooking is about getting creative and having some fun, opening tins of grey-brown mush and swirling them together seems somewhat antithetical to that.

Furthermore, I spent my entire 20s knocking about with people on the poverty line, and every single one of them cooked proper meals. In fact to this day I don't think I've ever seen anyone open a tin of potatoes when you can buy a bag of them for the same price.

Furthermore, I think Jack would run in to a lot less scrutiny/controversy if she kept quieter about certain elements of her life that contradict the Ken Loach narrative that she's trying to paint. People on the poverty line don't go swanning round Glastonbury festival or drink a bottle of whiskey every night

Exactly this. I have said before I grew up poor but always had something to eat( exciting or not) for my dinner. Some nights we would inwardly groan if it was not our fave, but we ate it all the same. My issue with her food is she seems to try and cook a la carte, with the wrong ingredients and it ends up looking shite. Most poverty stricken people just want something simple, sausage, mash and beans/ gravy, chicken and veg with potatoes, chicken nuggets and chips, stews. While she over there slogging lemon into random things and topping with anchovies and eggs. It's weird!