Jack Monroe #240 Schwankend

[Mr Krabs]

So, is she done with listing the clothes and reorganising the kitchen now?

Coming up next - firing up the old Excel for a thorough cataloguing of each spoon, fork etc, date purchased, and unique features. Better buy some lever arch files. Of course, only about two spoons will be entered before she’s on to the next thing.

 

[HotesTilaire]

Spoiler: O/T

Who the duck is Alice (Evans)??

Spoiler: Ot reply

She is a shy, quiet, introverted lady, whose husband suddenly started dating a woman just 18 months after he ended their marriage, it’s all been a terrible shock that he’s having this “affair” also her hubs, Ioan Gruffud is definitely a horrible bastard.

 

[Flash123]

apologies if someone has already spotted this. Could this be Jack’s week??

 

[SadieHQ]

We're only on Page 8 but 'Full Spoon Chaos' and 'Cuntlery' must come back again towards the end....I'm owling and champagning wildly at these.... my fraus, you are on fire today

 

[FunnyFuneral]

Thanks for the new thread @Silver Linings

I posted this at the end of the last thread, but I really feel it is too good a counting opportunity to miss..... please forgive my indulgence!

I have 12 big spoons, 6 soup spoons, 4 tea spoons (where the duck do they all go?) That's my main cutlery draw. Then I have a posh (£40 from Argos in a fancy satin lined box) set for Crimbo and the like which has 8 big spoons, 8 soup spoons and 8 tea spoons, plus 2 serving spoons.

Therefore, in my household of 2 normal adults, we have 48 spoons. This is excessive, I am going to list them on ebay for Jack to purchase for a hefty fee.

How many spoons do you have cabal??

Ahhh counting cabal, loving this! I have 14 big spoons, 11 (!!) Tea spoons, some big some smaller a couple of demi tasse, 3 small dessert spoons shaped like scallop shells (hmm there were 6 lf them, wonder where the other 3 went) and a serving spoon to match (from my great aunt's house after she was DEAD), one tea spoon with a curly end to sit on the side of your cup that came with a hot chocolate set (gifted, and annoying), 1 metal spoon thats bigger than a big spoon but smaller than a serving spoon that i use every day for cooking, 1 elegant round spoon with a long enamelled handle thats the perfect size for measuring scoops of stuff like gravy granules and the newest member of the spoon family, a coco pops cereal spoon that Mr FF got for Christmas along with a bowl & small pack of coco pops (he has weird friends as well as a weird wife).
I make that 33 spoons which is 11 for each member of the household (not counting the dog as he has trouble holding them). Seems a lot, and I'm surprised by the number of tea spoons as I always have trouble finding one !
More spoons than chairs, and certainly more than teeth xx

 

[Boyo]

….or she could sell it and donate the money to the RNLI? Just a thought


Literally no budget….

Considering how much she spent in the #nospendyear, 2022 is likely to be a total spree from beginning to end!

 

[maytoseptember]

Vintage cheese calculator. View attachment 989237

She presents this as the most amazing item of the lot, but if you look at the empty spaces in the case, it’s missing 5 out of 9 of its little weights, so it’s functionally useless and basically worthless as an antique collectible too.

 

[PortiaControl]

Oh dear eight pages to grunk. Really hoping to find out that Dear Heart MancBee survived the spoons...

In that spoon reflection she was wearing a cream jumper. Black clothes Jack IS DEAD!

 

[Lanie]

I had a spoon story at the end of the thread but it was dull so I am not reposting it.

I might kick off about something vaguely on-topic later.

Who knows.

My dad used to collect spoons we had them on display cases. He binned off to chairty them circa 2003. She's about thirty years to late for spoon collector.

She really does collect the most worthless tit doesn't she?!

 

[bowiethesdmn]

This is genuinely baffling. 'Oh I'm decluttering my kitchen' *buys millions of bleeping spoons, rancid cutlery and inexplicable scales*

If my wife or any of my friends did that I'd be genuinely concerned. Dying at the Rolex spoon though, sort of want to buy one if I'm honest.

Joining in the cutlery count, I dunno how many spoons I have because I hate washing up, am incredibly lazy, and discovered Sainos sells a pack of compostable cutlery for two quid. I think it's a pack of 100 including knives and forks so I guess about 25?

 

[frankychester]

Different Allegra but...

 

[Mr Krabs]

She presents this as the most amazing item of the lot, but if you look at the empty spaces in the case, it’s missing 5 out of 9 of its little weights, so it’s functionally useless and basically worthless as an antique collectible too.

I can think of some other uses for a tiny set of scales.

 

[Froggies]

Are we counting spoons now? Because I have A LOT

Spoiler: Spoon count

Off the top of my head:
Cutlery set inherited from my dearly departed inlaws - 1 serving spoon, 8 dessert spoons, 8 soup spoons, 8 tea spoons (stored in a case in sideboard)
My “posh” cutlery that my mum got me with her tesco vouchers - 6 tea spoons, 6 dessert spoons, 6 soup spoons, 1 serving spoon (also lives in sideboard)
30 cheap dessert spoons - £1 for 5 (or 6, can’t remember) from tesco for a party. Also live in sideboard and now used as cutlery when we have bbqs
Normal cutlery - lives in kitchen because who the duck doesn’t have cutlery in their kitchen?! Probably around 15 various dessert spoons and only 8 teaspoons because we somehow lose these regularly
2 slotted spoons
1 Ladle
1 pair of salad servers

But I am not Jack because mine are clean

 

[FlirtyThirty]

Spoiler: O/T

Who the duck is Alice (Evans)??

Don’t do it to yourself!!!

 

[secretsu]

Someone who has more grubby, old and bendy spoons than Jack...

Those spoons in little boxes were what all our parents bought when they went to the seaside, no?

I have no idea how many spoons I have, but they are many, not as many as Jack though.

Trying out a spoiler for the first time for draining board talk... I designed my own kitchen and my very pleasant kitchen fitter asked which side I wanted the grooves put in the worktop for my draining board, I went for the right side as that was what was there previously, but he offered to put them in both sides if I wanted because I am posh like that *insert Hyacinth Bucket gif here*

 

[Ninch55]

Spoiler: O/T

Who the duck is Alice (Evans)??

She makes Jack look calm and composed. That’s how much you should NOT enter the thread.

 

[hollywood]

I’m willing to bet I’ve got loads of miscellaneous excess cutlery not just spoons Periodically one of my cats rifles through the drawers in the kitchen and removes items to the back of the unit . It’s all integrated so we struggle to get far enough in to retrieve stuff . Even when we take all the drawers out to reach in and flail about and see what we can grab back we don’t have much luck . End up buying more and she ends up stealing whatever she wants like some kind of dragon cat hoarding pizza cutters etc like a dragon hoards gold . I have no clue why she does this

 

[BlendedSlop]

Thanks to Silver's closeup of this reflection, I now have some idea of what it must feel like to be a bowl of slop, staring up in fear and hatred at the one who orchestrated my wretched fate.

 

[alethophobia]

i dip in and out of jack and have just seen the spoons (and roughly how much they cost). for someone whose entire brand is all about saving money and being on a budget, the fact she’s spent around £100 on just spoons is ridiculous!!!

(i’m not saying that she can’t buy treat items and can’t treat herself to some fun items but why bleeping spoon )

 

[Lisbon]

Spoon Jack reminds me of this Simpsons clip...

Clip from: Trash of the Titans

Look, guys. I got a Springfield spoon for my spoon collection. Oh, here we go. How many spoons have you got now, Adam? Nine. If I didn't have my spoons, I'd go insane. Can I see it? My spoon! Ow! Wankers.

comb.io