Jack Monroe #235 Goggleslop

[Shawads]

me I would genuinely be thrilled if I heard someone ask for one, but I’m exceptionally easily pleased. Even the thought of someone else doing it makes me laugh.

weirdly, of all the things I’ve ever shared here. This feels the most personal!

It made me chuckle we should all make a pledge to do it on the same day

 

[ChickenPorridge]

A friend of mine posted this on his SM earlier, and I feel it’s appropriate to share here… View attachment 958045

Honest to god at first glance I thought Jack had uploaded another makeup look ‍

 

[Mr Krabs]

I seem to remember there was a listing on Amazon for new book but can’t seem to find it now. Am I imagining things?

What makes me laugh is that if you search for her name on Amazon, a much better looking cookbook called Canned comes up as the sponsored result. And it’s Mediterranean food that actually looks edible. Hahaha.

I’m annoyed now as I’ve had to scroll through a page of grinning/gurning Jacks. Why does she always have her face on the front of her cook books? The only other chefs who are front and centre on their cook books are the really big names like Nigella and THAT MAN because, well, they’re famous and recognisable. I suppose it’s better than the grimy food photos.

 

[bowiethesdmn]

The dopiest thing about Jack's books (apart from the recipes) is that they are out of date by the time they're printed. All the idiotic, forensic costings about a stock cube being a quarter of a threepence etc. and feeding eleventyfour people are more irrelevant than ever as food and utility bills are sky rocketing. Jack's brief spell in the spotlight must be nearly over.

She has to be on her way out. A friend of mine has just asked me what to do with a certain item out of her food bank veg box and within 30 secs we found a recipe that isn't patronising, tells you the cost per serving instead of Jack's weird way of doing it, and uses commonly found ingredients. No prunes, no tinned fish, there wasn't even a rambling, misspelled autobiography involved!

 

[Ispyabudgetbeanblogger]

If they did release her from any book obligations would she owe them any money?
I've no idea how these things work.

Yes, an advance is an advance on royalties. A publisher takes a gamble on a book. Contracts vary widely. Here's a simplified example: a publisher might think we'll shift 100 copies of this book and we'll sell it at £10, and the author gets 10% royalties (£1), so we can pay an advance of 100 copies x £1 royalty = £100

If they only sell 50 copies, the author won't have to pay anything back. The publisher made a bad deal for themselves.

If they sell more than 100 copies, the author will receive £100 as they write the book (that's the advance) then nothing until they sold the 101st copy of the book. They will then receive £1 per copy for every book sold, usually in quarterly or bi-annually instalments.

Some authors also manage to negotiate a better percentage and forgo the advance.

Then there are deals about multiple books, so an author might get a £30,000 advance for three books. Whether a publisher makes the author pay back an advance in that situation really depends on the contract and how many copies were shifted. Let's say the first book commissioned as part of this deal does incredibly well and the publisher makes a load of money on it. If the author then doesn't deliver the remaining two books, the publisher may think that they'd only hoped for £100,000 in sales on book one but ended up making £500,000 so they may cut their losses. But yes, legally and advance is linked to a) a book being written to a specified deadline and b) a calculation by the publisher on how popular they think the book will be.

I'm certain at this stage her advances will be very small fry.

ETA: others have already explained this. I'm slow.

 

[Hollaaa]

by j twenty, can you imagine?
Stay safe out there.

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

Deadlines. Book 7.

June 27th 2021. Editing.

screenshot from @heretoreaditall2019

December 2021. Still editing.

(The January 2021 deadline was already an extended one)

 

[Saint_clemmie]

Late to the party (grunking as usual) but I bring a bottle even though I do drink! Isn't it quite common for guests to take a bottle of wine/few beers to a dinner, or even a bottle of spirits to a house party? Surely you could just bring a bottle of whatever alcohol free drink you fancy in leiu of wine, she could even bring a bottle of that tea stuff she insists is so good and maybe share it around to anyone interested as I/others do with their wine/gin/whatever. Especially if you have problems with alcohol, surely a more responsible message is to take ownership of what you drink and make sure you take along non-alcoholic options you actually like, rather than running the risk that there's nothing but warm cola and thinking "oh in that case, one wine won't hurt..."

I’m a boring frau who doesn’t drink caffeine, I keep a few of my favourite fruit teabags in my bag for whenever I visit friends or family for a cuppa. I don’t expect them to have stuff available just for me. I haven’t even felt the need to rant about it on social media.

 

[ChickenPorridge]

I just wish Twitter would do a huge bot/inactive account clearout and watch her follower count drop She would never reach the same numbers on another platform (look at her Tiktok, hehe) so we need to wait patiently for Twitter to die.

 

[Veronicaaa]

The poster who Neville Southall and the Secret Drug Addict retweeted has confirmed it's Jack she was talking about

 

[traumatised sideboard]

I fully believe the phone line arrangement aspect of that anecdote, what I don't believe is the having a friend part. She can't possibly have had time for friends what with karate, ballet, walking 14 miles to and from school while eating coronation chicken with her bare hands, eating lunch with English teachers and extracurricular slicing.

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

They don't do anything 'best'

 

[Readingismyhobby]

If she's had an advance for anything she hasn't delivered she'd probably have to pay it back - would depend on how the contract was worded.

She would probably start a begging campaign to cover the cost of repaying the fees.

 

[Captainmouse]

Deadlines. Book 7.

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June 27th 2021. Editing.
View attachment 958160screenshot from @heretoreaditall2019

December 2021. Editing
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(The January 2021 deadline was already an extended one)

So she had an iPad for bootstrap (puddle no doubt) a pixel book, iMac, MacBook, numerous iPhones, wish I was that poor

 

[Dogmuck]

Deadlines. Book 7.

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June 27th 2021. Editing.
View attachment 958160screenshot from @heretoreaditall2019

December 2021. Still editing.
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(The January 2021 deadline was already an extended one)

That is a beautiful piece of work Marms. Can we get that in the Wiki under latest book deadlines?

 

[Lanie]

Her food has never been my demographic. I don't like tinned food as mentioned and during the odd time I do use them. I have a basic enough knowledge in how to make it into something without rinsing it or blending it. I do get that other people don't have this, so perhaps she was on to something there.

However since the slopfest of everything blended she really really does nothing to rattle my taste buds. I'm fact she makes me sad for the food and what she has inflicted to it.

 

[GoLando]

So she had an iPad for bootstrap (puddle no doubt) a pixel book, iMac, MacBook, numerous iPhones, wish I was that poor

Hang on. Wasn’t Bootstrap the one written on an archaic Nokia?!

 

[Powershower]

View attachment 957510

Gonna start calling her Icarus at this stage

 

[Captainmouse]

Hang on. Wasn’t Bootstrap the one written on an archaic Nokia?!

Exactly, but in those screenshots she says she drowned the iPad at deadline

 

[MooBelle]

Deadlines. Book 7.

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June 27th 2021. Editing.
View attachment 958160screenshot from @heretoreaditall2019

December 2021. Still editing.
View attachment 958164




(The January 2021 deadline was already an extended one)

Ah, I love a little trip down memory lane!
I forgot she knocked Threw an Ipad in a bucket of bleach. So that's an Ipad destroyed and a lost laptop in less than a year without batting an eyelid.
Oh and also Jack, a quick reminder as to why you couldn't get SEISS is because you earn too much money to qualify for help.
Seriously, she made an absolute fortune off of the back of the pandemic.
DKL, Hellmans, Del Monte are just three things that only happened because of Covid, there are countless other streams of income that she's got.
She also said she wasn't entitled to furlough for Caroline (her assistant) and whinged about how Rishimate was ignoring her. She however was collecting the furlough payments (we have the receipts) so she got away with the financial bonus of not paying her assistant.