Jack Monroe #170 Outrageous grifting dirtbag

[ThunderClapForCapers]

She's like an insect trapped in amber doomed to remain frozen for all time except rather than being beautiful, she's a massive vile bellend on Twitter. Remarkable! Hopefully we're not going to get a Jurassic Park situation out of her.

Could we come up with a Jack Monroe Theme Park between us and regenerate Southend seafront? I can imagine many happy customers meandering around 'It's a Small World' in a hollowed out husk of a human being that is gently, softly, floating on a river of brown slop, accompanied by the background sound of her picking out the iconic tune on a piano. A good shin-kicking will of course be meted out to anyone queue-jumping, and Emergency Services will need to be on hand should anyone attempt to hoover up the goods like a modern-day Augustus Gloop. There must be plenty of other fairground classics? Funny Facetune Mirrors? The David Walliams Big Dipper? Ghost House of Ex-Fiancées? Spinning Crockery Chaos for the little ones.

 

[TurnedUpInTipp]

This is a good example of Jack using strange phrasing to say things and not say things at the same time.

She both alludes to her having been a firefighter and ensures that if questioned she can truthfully point out AHHHH BUT YOU SEE I DIDN'T SAY I WAS A FIREFIGHTER I SAID HE WAS CONFUSED ABOUT MY FIRE SERVICE JOB.

Also obvs it never happened. Even if it did I can’t imagine anyone being interested. Kids say weird stuff.

Jeez... I didn't read that as alluding to the fire service at all but as the boy outing her as a pole dancer!
I'm not with it at all today.

 

[Pocahontas]

Friday night thread

Jack Monroe #171 Just discovered her and think she’s horrid

Congratulations to @HBF1991 for the words (I adapted them slightly so as not to be tooooo negative) and @Fruitjack for the nomination 🎉 your joint prize: this. A vegan version can be rustled up, fear not. Recap of last thread She was fleetingly angry about school lunches again. She was...

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