Guest houses PLURAL, dahling.These Tweets are like Jack's greatest hits. Checking off:
Didn't happen (then everyone clapped)
Thankyou for doing the Lord's work through WayBack Machine @colouredlines
Jack Monroe #170 Outrageous grifting dirtbag
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Guest houses... plural.
Poor wee working class mite
Also woodchip... in 2012?! The fucker really was a slumlord. Happy memories fleecing the poor eh, Jackie. Apples don’t fall far etc etc.
ETA lol beaten to it soz @Veronicaaa
Only on team building days. They get a photo all dressed up in real firefighters' kit, too - kinda like the Day at the Zoo Experiences, just without actually doing the real job/tossing chopped carrots at Okapis.
She really doesn’t have much luck with trains does she?!
Wholesome (!) off topic but also tickled me...
Our friend Gerald the Gardener, who is a delight and I am livid about Jack muscling in in his loveliness, well, he is now involved with a Gucci campaign. See, Jack - if you are honest, hard working and true to yourself, then you are rewarded!
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Gucci!
Our friend Gerald the Gardener, who is a delight and I am livid about Jack muscling in in his loveliness, well, he is now involved with a Gucci campaign. See, Jack - if you are honest, hard working and true to yourself, then you are rewarded!
.
Gucci!
Gosh those sickly sweet tweets are so sickly. I think I just vommited.
That's the kind of behaviour id block people for being smarmy gits. You can be too nice.
Also if she's wholesome I'm glad Im not.
That's the kind of behaviour id block people for being smarmy gits. You can be too nice.
Also if she's wholesome I'm glad Im not.
Thread title suggestion:Here goes. The best of 2017 Jack, courtesy of the Wayback Machine. Broken pictures are due to problems with the archive. In any screenshot with multiple tweets, read bottom to top.
What was Jack like four years ago?
She had moved a mere 17 times...
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...and she was pretending to be hygienic. We all saw that Del Monte chicken recipe!
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Her arthritis was really bad - thank goodness that cleared up, eh?
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Her Coming Out Scandal du jour? Prostitution.
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This leads thematically to her best #ThatHappened of the time:
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She still found time for a spot of begging, though.
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She got drunk and destroyed her favourite bag:
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Fair enough, she wasn't going to be able to afford a new one any time soon:
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Oh dear.
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A bit more begging, you say? Why not?
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She got sick with an unspecified but disgusting illness.
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...and she reminisced about her impoverished childhood. Too poor for an instrument, but not for ballet or karate.
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Some things never change: she was as triggering as ever...
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...and she couldn't spell.
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That's our Jack:
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Any final thoughts, Jack?
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The money is being obstructed by the sword of Domacles
I'll join you!bleeping hell. I might go back on the roof
To me she's a poorly rinsed (then painted) bean tin with tripple-used beet root cooking water. Full though.
I read that in Father Ted's voice.
Thread title: sometimes I work mostly I grift.
"Same grift, different year, ex admirers are flocking here"
Thread title.
Thread title.
Ruby Tandoh has released an audio cookery book. Ha, ha, bet Jacky is tamping
Yeah, she spoke about it on that thing with Grace Dent and Jack. She explained how she wanted it to be like someone's with you in the kitchen, like a friend guiding you along. About 5 seconds later, Jack made up that story about how she enjoys teaching friends to cook and uses them as recipe testersRuby Tandoh has released an audio cookery book. Ha, ha, bet Jacky is tamping
This is a good example of Jack using strange phrasing to say things and not say things at the same time.
She both alludes to her having been a firefighter and ensures that if questioned she can truthfully point out AHHHH BUT YOU SEE I DIDN'T SAY I WAS A FIREFIGHTER I SAID HE WAS CONFUSED ABOUT MY FIRE SERVICE JOB.
Also obvs it never happened. Even if it did I can’t imagine anyone being interested. Kids say weird stuff.
In the court stuff I was reading today, it mentioned that she applied for the RAF but was turned down.
I wish I had the skillz to do a Biggles-type mock up....
I wish I had the skillz to do a Biggles-type mock up....
I heard about it on R4 today. A presenter (who is blind, can’t remember his name), used it to bake a cake.Yeah, she spoke about it on that thing with Grace Dent and Jack. She explained how she wanted it to be like someone's with you in the kitchen, like a friend guiding you along. About 5 seconds later, Jack made up that story about how she enjoys teaching friends to cook and uses them as recipe testers
Ooh was it Peter White? I really like him.
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