Jack Monroe #170 Outrageous grifting dirtbag

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"hey, jack! I know how much you love taylor and you're such a fantastic singer accidental conqueror of fears, let's sing exile together! you can pick it out on the old joanna and I'll let you do taylor's parts!"
As if that song wasn't traumatic enough already.
 
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Probably nothing - I wouldn't be able to recognise her unless she was wearing a tshirt saying 'I am Jack Monroe, and this is what I look like without face tuning "
 
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This inspired me to check her patreon numbers. She has 342 patrons. Hasn't this gone down a bit?
Yeah she lost 12 this month end and has only gained a handful back. I’ve got a script / database set up to grab it every 10 minutes in the hope of proving her grift but she’s not done any outright tin rattles in a while !

Print screen shows the drop end of Feb (the weird timestamp is called epoch it’s like computer time) - will share end of March’s as and when too. Are we betting for a bigger or smaller drop??
 

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Hey guys guys, I just found footage of her when there is a sale on in the expensive tat shops.
 
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Oh, good. I prefer the Richmond sausages though I have to limit myself as to the number. I have to be careful to check when in the freezer though as I also have the meat ones for feeding my dog her daily dose of painkiller for arthritis! (I cook them, then cut into thirds, freeze most and keep a week's worth of thirds in the fridge. I cut a cone of meat out, syringe the liquid in, cone back in, and present it to her cone end first so any spill goes into her mouth. A very happy girl with her Magic Sausage.)
 
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People impress me with their pet hacks. Anyone see the Tiktok with the woman putting cling film and peanut butter on her head - genius.
 
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I spent my lunch break going through the last few threads trying to find the insta name of NotJack. I love facts and I love a good stalk. Sadly, I don’t have instagram and just use one of those stalking sites. Checked LM but they only go back so far and not enough to see any JM slops.

However, I was thinking... if we saw a hand or an arm, that would be a tell tale sign that NotJack IS Jack as she would herself. We know those tattoos like the back of our hands. No shite scrawl on mine btw.

Ergo........ if NO hands/arms appear at all then the LACK of them might prove it’s her too.

Orrrrrrr as Poca said, maybe it’s someone pretending to be ‘Jack as NotJack’. Now THAT is one bored ninny.
 
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The other theory I had, which kind of ties Jack/LJC and Pocas theory together, is that it’s not Jack but she’s in on it. If she has any of her claimed friends (/loyal Squig) they’re behind it to mess with us while it’s still technically NotJack.
 
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If I met Jack I’d say “I have half a bag of parsley, brioche, some Babybel wax sheathing and a gherkin, what can I do with it?”
 
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Mmm @CabalofBolorneaise that is probably more likely. Still odd whichever 3 of the options is real! If any body parts show up soon, we will know they read here. We’re alllllllways triangulating (*monster’s inc ‘sl*g lady with glasses’ voice)
 
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Print screen shows the drop end of Feb (the weird timestamp is called epoch it’s like computer time)
OMG is that what epoch is??? I use a website called epoch converter to look at week numbers almost every single day at work (to calculate accrued holiday for employees, I don't just want to know what week number it is all the time) and I just thought it was the name of the company who owned the website! Learn a new thing every day over here!!!
 
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Only mammals lactate apart from the oddities like a platypus. Snakes aren't mammals
On a Grunka so sorry if someone already said this but when venom is taken from snake fangs it's called milking. So now snakes have nipples on their teeth
 
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If I met Jack I would ask if her favourite colour is brown and also how many teeth does she have. I'd also ask to adopt Dash, I would you pay you in sideboards Jack, he can come and live with my bunnies instead.
 
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If I met Jack I’d say “I have half a bag of parsley, brioche, some Babybel wax sheathing and a gherkin, what can I do with it?”
You are taking a risk there, she might tell you what to do with it. You'd be sorry whatever her reply was.
 
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