Jack Monroe #170 Outrageous grifting dirtbag

[Orphan_Black]

Looking forward being home in Sunny Southend once this lockdown is over.
Will be forensically avoiding certain places, which made me think; what would you say to Jack if you were ever introduced?

I am loving the questions, we should collate them in case she ever comes back for the Q&A suggested in #31

Oh my gosh, she needs to one of those Reddit AMAs!!! They would rip her to shreds over there. It would be glorious.

 

[Boyo]

Looking forward being home in Sunny Southend once this lockdown is over.
Will be forensically avoiding certain places, which made me think; what would you say to Jack if you were ever introduced?

Oh. My. God! Ruby Rose!

 

[Emmapism]

Looking forward being home in Sunny Southend once this lockdown is over.
Will be forensically avoiding certain places, which made me think; what would you say to Jack if you were ever introduced?

........And you are?

 

[Vanelope]

This magic puddle you speak of... is it owned by leprechauns or did you need to sacrifice something? (Bring out Oirish Jack)

 

[Boyo]

Oh. My. God! Ruby Rose!

Hate quoting myself but inspired by @Emmapism ”And you are?", may I offer as an alternative: “I loved you in Orange is the New Black but, please, you’ve got to look after yourself. You look like crap.”

 

[Orphan_Black]

This magic puddle you speak of... is it owned by leprechauns or did you need to sacrifice something? (Bring out Oirish Jack)

Maybe that's why all her oils are in little bottles? Leprechauns!!!

 

[Suffolkmum]

I don’t understand why they involve her? What can she bring? She is so out of touch

Token poor person to the rest of the completely out of touch panel

 

[DinosaurSenior]

"....and what is it that you do?"

 

[MancBee]

what would you say to Jack if you were ever introduced?

Move your arse from that yellow sticker shelf and give someone else who needs it a chance.

 

[Lanie]

Maybe that's why all her oils are in little bottles? Leprechauns!!!

Shes king brian of knocknasheega. Hopefully the poteen ( or moonshine as she calls it) is plentiful in the mash

 

[Hollaaa]

Can you use 'mendacious' in a sentence?

 

[Suffolkmum]

Spoiler: OT: Slug chat

You think standing on slugs with bare feet is bad...So, when me and my Mrs N first started dating I was living temporarily at my mums. I only had a single bed so we slept on a fancy blow up downstairs. In the room is French doors into the garden. I had no idea slugs got in there. I had a drink to the side of the bed and in the night picked it up and felt something on the side of the glass, in my half asleep state I thought it was a gummy sweet or something and on realisation I slung whatever I had felt across the room on to the table. It was a massive slug that had climbed up my glass. I was so traumatised.

On topic, Jack really should be getting more grief for this centre right bollocks, I mean come on! Comrade my arse.

Traumatised, I would have had to have been sedated!

 

[Toffee finger]

Looking forward being home in Sunny Southend once this lockdown is over.
Will be forensically avoiding certain places, which made me think; what would you say to Jack if you were ever introduced?

“Why couldn’t you listen to three different vets?”

I hope to god that doesn’t ever happen though! She’s already ruined some of the walks we used to do so I can avoid the small chance of seeing her

 

[Aquamarina]

If I met Jack I’d say, “Why are you still trotting out your poverty story after all these years? Surely you’ve moved on by now. It’s a bit gauche darling.”

 

[Lanie]

If I met her i Would say crikey we are not in twitter and you are here?

 

[waffle maker]

For someone who makes a living talking about starving her self so her son could eat she is pretty bleeping picky about what can go in a charity food parcel to help out over the holidays. She might actually put people off donating.

 

[Suffolkmum]

Looking forward being home in Sunny Southend once this lockdown is over.
Will be forensically avoiding certain places, which made me think; what would you say to Jack if you were ever introduced?

Come on tell me, how do you sleep?

 

[DrtCrl]

Jack makes everything seem 10 times harder than it is.

On a grunk and possibly too early but can I nominate this for a thread title?!!

 

[SadieHQ]

If I met her I'd have to reference the divine Slopbot...

'Oi, Jack-mate - this is the Onion Police - and you're NICKED'

 

[kachoochoo]

"hey, jack! I know how much you love taylor and you're such a fantastic singer accidental conqueror of fears, let's sing exile together! you can pick it out on the old joanna and I'll let you do taylor's parts!"