Jack Monroe #16 Queen of the freezer, bathtime teaser & blue tick pleaser

[heretoreaditall2019]

The captions are so ridiculous, why have they made it sound like she’s built a house out of gear shes nicked out a bin?

“crafted a desk space” - it looks like a standard console, may have been painted a pastel colour?

“managed to make a shelf out of a bed” aka re purposed perfectly fine wood, rather than sending it to landfill.

 

[PoorPatrol]

I made the salad bag pesto. You know, it was actually RANK. I followed her recipe, although I used well in date salad. It was green, but that's about it. The silver dollar pancakes were actually great, but she's no great innovator.

No no no no no no noooooooo

The salad has to be MANKY. Understand? Mankyyyyyy. Don’t blame Saint Jack of the Poor for your incorrect interpretation of her fantastic and original recipe! Unless you’re looking at a bag of 50% E.coli then you’re too posh for it to work.

 

[PineappleQueen19]

How I howled over that.

View attachment 131604

You won't last an hour. If she said that to me when I was at the checkout, I would tell her to go blow a goat.

I find it telling that she assumes people are buying items without a plan or idea as to how to consume them.

It’s the same problem with her manky salad bag pesto. It’s just a gimmick ‘solution’ when it would be so much better to look at how people can wean themselves off buying the salad bags in the first place and encourage ways of consuming more greens when they’re fresh.

 

[Silver Linings]

All of this to say she made french toast. Maverick!

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i just can’t overstate how much I hate her writing style. My opinion of course, your honour.

 

[AdultHumanFemale]

Oh God, why?

 

[Mel Donte]

I wish she'd stop name dropping Anthony Bourdain particularly when posting a photo of the most disgusting slop ever, crap poached eggs with hard yolks bunged on top of a load of other hideous looking thrown together ingredients then a packet of cheap crappy crinkle cut crisps sprinkled on top.
She is an insult to all things *culinary* and to insinuate that her food could in any way help when people are suffering from depression is beyond the pale.

Using Bourdain to advertise her shitty 'depressipes' is fucking gross.

 

[lipsticktaser]

You don't get it, do you? She's too POOR to get a sports bra and joggers. Seriously, stay in your lane.

But wealthy enough for a£28 crop top. I’m surprised she’s not sown together some hankies and cooked spaghetti.

 

[Bellybutton lint]

What on earth is this slop? And it is in her BOOK? UGH

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

I love a tattle petition share. Some sheep will sign it but generally it sends more nosey folks over to these parts and many stick around.

It’s a total win for Team Tattle.

tattle is honestly the best moderated online “home” I’ve ever seen. I’ve seen self policing & mod policing and it’s always prompt/just. I’m only ever a few scrolls away from racism & bile on Twitter / Facebook, I mean ffs Instagram is a hotbed of n o n c e (this gets changed to p once which I swear is a slur?) activity with the inappropriate images of children insta mamas choose to upload for their engagement ergo sponcon.

What influencers don’t like is the fact there’s an arena for people to discuss & critique (where fair) the shit they get up to with impunity on socials. They can block & report it and get it taken down on their turf, they can’t here. It’s the biggest baby strop going.

 

[Oxford_Girl]

Hasn’t she thought about getting her fridge FIXED? Absolutely not as she’s got her begging bowl out with Smeg. What a chancer.

So over a £1000 for a Smeg fridge but at the start of lock down was asking for donations for the work she had lost?

 

[I steal names]

That spaghetti hoop monstrosity has actually angered me. It's just such blatant bullshit for her to take up space on a page. A 500g bag of value pasta is under £1 isn't it? Just fucking cook some of that and have it with cheese, butter, salt and pepper. Or have hoops on toast. Or on a baked tattie. Or maybe with a potato waffle. She makes meals into a form of self flagellation.

 

[Nottonightbabe]

I can't stop laughing at this 'recipe'.

Delicious tin can recipe: Jack Monroe's anellini con cacio e pepe

Jack Monroe’s Tin Can Cook features 75 delicious recipes that use only canned foods and dried ingredients. Try her delicious, easy-to-make anellini con cacio e pepe.

www.panmacmillan.com

What the fuck?! "They will fall apart a little" - no shit! You've just washed some hoops under a tap and nuked them to death
She should be sued for the use of the word 'recipe'.

 

[PennyLoafer]

I can’t imagine how volatile she is in private, based on the public version (where you’d think she’d be reining it in a bit). I also remember some quote with her kid’s dad where he referred to having to “keep the peace”. Which makes it sound like they are walking on eggshells around her.

Enormously volatile, I reckon. If, as someone suggested, Mrs J has moved out for her job and they have not actually split up, I can imagine Jack making Louisa's life very difficult out of raging insecurity. At any rate, I expect we will see a lot more bathtime/crop top/come hither content from the Patron Saint of Oversharing.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

We ain’t going to court. I mean, I sort of wish we were, for all kinds of reasons (mostly, how fab it would be to meet all you gals), but Jack has no case. And any solicitor worth their salt would have told her this. Which isn’t to say that Jack would have listened to the advice of course (she doesn’t seem the type to listen to anyone to be fair), but this is not a Katie Hopkins scenario. Rather, this would be a free speech case - in which she tries to shut down a very mild gossip site for expressing some (let’s face it) pretty mild views. Even the blue ticks would baulk at supporting that. Compared even to MN, this is fluffy kittens central.

There was a really interesting post a few threads ago from a solicitor couple about all of this & I suspect that’s why we’ve not been threatened with ”costly legal action ladies” since. I wish I had a print screen but the jist of it was exactly that - online forums have certain protections as they are simply hosting discussions which are protected by freedom of speech laws?

Obviously this would be different if we were discussing genuinely illegal weirdo shit like bomb construction or extremist ideology. Although I imagine a few of her recipes could be deemed by the objective person as tantamount to biological warfare so we’ll have to be careful there haus fraus

 

[lipsticktaser]

Fellow Bourdain lovers. Parts unknown is coming to Netflix in June
All of them. Rejoice, rejoice.
I’m here for crisps on things. I’ve done Cheetos and Doritos as breadcrumbs in chicken. Spicy Cheetos on Mac and cheese. Mainly ‘dirty’ food. (Hate that expression but you know what I mean). And you cannot beat a roll and crisps. Yummmmmy. Don’t think I’d have them with eggs mind.

Back to the task at hand. Those potatoes are actually Joël Robochon’s. Anthony done a take of them for food and wine magazine.

Anthony Bourdain's Mashed Potatoes, Kind of Robuchon-Style

These heavenly, rich mashed potatoes from Anthony Bourdain are made with lots — and lots — of butter as inspired by Joël Robuchon.

www.foodandwine.com

This is the useless information I retain.

Tony hated celebrity chefs. He hated the commercialism if the food industry and was quite scathing of people like Rachel Ray. Doubt he would have taken to someone with no kitchen experience and a bullshit persona championing themselves as cook of the people. He’d of seen through her in a min.
That’s not to say he was a twat to everyone. Tony was a real champion of chefs and spoke regularly of those he admired.

It’s like she’s plucked his name out because of his battles with addiction (he went from heroin to work. He was definitely addicted to work) and ultimately his death by suicide. It’s crass and insulting to his memory to tie him to her new book.

 

[MarmiteExtract]

She just kept making them so we kept eating them

I feel this may be a phenomenon Jack doesn’t experience too often with her guests.

 

[CarrotsandSticks]

I saw Mike Tindall on BBC Breakfast this morning. He was talking about how the pandemic has been impacting on the charities he supports and I guess hopefully raising some awareness of them. It made me think that although Jack styles herself as a poverty campaigner and food bank qsupporter (though think that has disappeared from her Twitter bio and been replaced by TV presenter) she very infrequently users her sizeable platform to promote these causes, small charities etc. And if she does mention them, it's because she has donated some books or something else self serving so actually ends up all about her anyway.

Thats because JM is a beggy leech and what shes doing is leaching off food banks, not supporting them with her profit orientated books filled with digusting, wasteful recipes. And heres a shot of my gorgeous dog for her printer. Edited to take out all the other pictures i added by accident

 

[PoorPatrol]

OMG her other old Instagram page!!

From 2012. She’s bought kittens, gone on holiday, appears to have a home and a garden. The kid is even eating bread and jam!! Sorry, no lightbulbs?

 

[GoLando]

Mind you @People-huv-tae-know, your user name is pretty braw too

What is it with these people biting the hand that feeds them? I know we never know what goes on behind closed doors but if she’s not painting a picture that her folks didn’t care enough about her (even though her mum’s on Twitter and can see everything ) then that other bloody national treasure Joe Wicks has been slagging off his mum for not breastfeeding him when he was a baby!!

What we really need in life is more men criticising how women use their bodies

 

[Fitnessqueen]

Ok so I’m still watching Daily Kitchen. Husband walked in while Jack was making her Chinese chicken curry and said “that looks delicious”. Is it worth trying (substituting something veggie for the chicken) or shall I just divorce him?