Jack Monroe #146 Can we see the Emin please, cos the rest of this is ugly af

[PoorPatrol]

View attachment 422430Is that a snail?

Whatever it is, I hate it.

 

[kachoochoo]

of course he did!

 

[Raydog]

Why the duck is that top left photo worthy of a place in a book or as part of a campaign?

Where is everything always so brown

 

[Emmapism]

I hope she puts up the recipe for this

Tis but the work of a moment

 

[Scarletfever]

So she was recipe testing for Del Monte then. Book must have been handed in.

Lol. Just kidding.

Poor Del Monte. 22 variations on slop to try and differentiate between

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Brilliant.
My 3 year old daughter looked over my shoulder and saw the duck and said that he has to say YES (thats her vote hopefully not for prune ice cream though because i'm not making that!!)

Kids eh!

So this giphy is just for her!

Aww!


That's me when I come back from work and Mr D hasn't got around to thinking about food until I've walked in the door, so calls out 'What would you like to eat?'.

 

[Scarletfever]

of course he did!

View attachment 422522

Love it when her squiggles throw accidental shade like this

Squiggle's 11 year old son is wise.

 

[holliebollie]

I really don’t want to alarm anyone... but I have some serious news. Whilst on a walk, I’ve seen evidence of the recent bird pandemic spreading to other species. Rest in power, sweet catbat 🤍🤍🤍

 

[SweetTransvestite]

*This annoyed me to the point I've had to cockify the squiggle.

 

[HotesTilaire]

She’s a bemused douche with her amuse yeux metaphors mixing.
Just stop putting things together like a “maverick” you’re basically getting everything wrong.
ETA- @SweetTransvestite Im crying now and I have to FaceTime someone that Incant explain the cockifying to

 

[SweetTransvestite]

Tis but the work of a moment

A moment of maverick genius

 

[Boyo]

She had to get the toaster down from a shelf

Toaster? Toaster! She doesn’t have a toaster. The noise of the toast popping up is too like someone knocking the door, which triggers The Poverty PTSD. Better to fire up the whole oven grill for a single piece. Much cheap.

ETA: She has a toaster.

 

[blurstoftimes]

She previously used her ability to make a semi freddo as an example of why she should be taken seriously as a proper cook (along with cooking dinner for Mary Portas, for duck's sake) but NOW apparently she makes semifreddo because she can't be arsed to stir!

I DESPISE food expert Jack. But it does amuse me how incredibly tit she is at food photography. Some of it is positively nightmarish.

 

[bazzam]

“I, like, Captain Sir Tom Moore, am military round the edges. I didn’t serve in Burma during World War Two, as a tattooed lesbian this would have been perniciously tantamount to treason, and anyway, the Recruiting Officer turned down my request to change my wardrobe saying “Good lord, pantaloons on a filly? Balderdash!”

I think, had he lived, Captain Sir Tom Moore (RIP, Viv) would have loved my maverick take on a Burmese Biryani, in which I substitute the rice for the shredded Lino from my kitchen floor and lasciviously combine it with the dark art of Mel Donte prune juice and a dead pigeon glove, found wounded on a paddy field in deepest, darkest Southend”

can anyone tell me why she thinks she is military around the edges? I as far as I can see she is grubby in person and home, messy, disorganised, impulsive, little respect of deadlines/timescale I could go on? perhaps she meant her haircut because I have no idea how else.

 

[Eurgh]

She previously used her ability to make a semi freddo as an example of why she should be taken seriously as a proper cook (along with cooking dinner for Mary Portas, for duck's sake) but NOW apparently she makes semifreddo because she can't be arsed to stir!

I DESPISE food expert Jack. But it does amuse me how incredibly tit she is at food photography. Some of it is positively nightmarish.

Oh God yeah, blue cheese and olives or something. Sounded rank. She thought it was some sort of mic drop to end all mic drops.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

This is food for Victorians not the currently living

 

[kachoochoo]

Brilliant.
My 3 year old daughter looked over my shoulder and saw the duck and said that he has to say YES (thats her vote hopefully not for prune ice cream though because i'm not making that!!)

Kids eh!

So this giphy is just for her!

aw, that's lovely!

mr kcc was like, "are you getting in the shower?" and i was like, "I just have to find the right gif first for Important Reasons!"

I'm glad I found the right gif

 

[Universal]

View attachment 422529
*This annoyed me to the point I've had to cockify the squiggle.

Off topic but my ex husband was funny at times and when I spent £££ on a fancy glass version of a whiteboard that you wrote on with a special marker which was really heavy and I proudly had mounted on the wall of the kitchen he would each day draw a different version of a cock and balls with pubes/no pubes/cum etc. I would be ranting at the time while laughing and saying, 'You are 50 years old and have a responsible job why do you to it??'. Him; I just cant not.

There have been many a school mum, tradesman, neighbour who seen it and like a true brit ignored it.

To keep it on topic that last 'foodograph' looks like the shite that you empty out the beach bag after a family day on the beach and there are bits of shell, discarded picnic and litter. Not like delicious jewels.

 

[Captainmouse]

Yeah she does! Charity begins at home.

The only charity she supports is herself, and topping up the Cotswold fund

 

[bazzam]

apparently, the last pic is prune and treacle ice cream, covered in what looks like the chestnut/onion emoji I discovered yesterday

yick

it sounds bleeping horrible.