Jack Monroe #129 Jack, could we have a quick chat?

[Gentlemensrelish]

Given how small she is doesn’t this just seem idiotic(the utensil bunting) I am 4ft 11 I generally don’t deliberately go out of my way to make getting utensils difficult I keep things I use everyday/frequently low and don’t make them potential hazards.

She probably uses her teeny tiny smol manic pixie wings to flutter up and get things.

 

[Eurgh]

Stop putting mixed dried herbs in everything!

 

[Veronicaaa]

Is it bad that I'm really looking forward to her moving house (possibly) so that we can it within days?

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[Boyo]

Boohoo, other chefs have larger kitchens. Dear heart, you are, in your own words 'NOT a chef', so I guess you are a food blogger and 'activist'. To my knowledge, many, many food bloggers have much smaller kitchens than you. I can't comment on the kitchen sizes of activists.

Every time she whines about the smol kitchen, I’m minded of Rachel Khoo and the amazing meals she made in that tiny ‘Paris Kitchen’.

 

[bowiethesdmn]

Why does the cutlery look so dirty?

It's not hard to wash it before a picture Jack.

Also, she cannot deal with ANYONE saying she’s getting better and being happy for her to be able to taste again. I half think the passive aggressive replies are aimed at here.

She's one of those draining fuckers you say 'alright?' to as you pass them in the hallway at work and they go 'ACTUALLY...' and launch into a comprehensive rundown of everything that's gone wrong that week, instead of the universally agreed upon 'yeah you?'

 

[Captainmouse]

utensil bunting? what?

metal implements hanging above the back door ready to smack you on the head. it's like something from a cartoon!

Ready for her macauley Calkin attack

 

[Harrybosch]

Is it bad that I'm really looking forward to her moving house (possibly) so that we can it within days?

Which she could prevent so easily if she wanted to.

 

[Vanilla Sorbet]

Wait...is she not doing Veganuary? Eggs are animal products

 

[bowiethesdmn]

Jack cares not for things like 'definitions' and 'accuracy'

 

[Droosie123]

Also the only Rosie and Jim song I know was a naughty one we sang at school as kids

Rosie and Jim
Rosie and Jim
Having it off
In an old dustbin
Jim goes AHH
Rosie for AHH
And out pops Eric cantana

Also is she 10, why is she wanting a pat on the back for cleaning her kitchen?! I expect that from my 8 year old when he cleans his room not a 33 year in their own home.

You've ruined it for me....ruined I tell you

 

[Boyo]

...but don’t YOU forget to support independent bookshops by buying my books!

 

[Veronicaaa]

Wait...is she not doing Veganuary? Eggs are animal products

Course she's not actually *doing* Veganuary - she's just rinsing it for all it's worth

 

[waffle maker]

Maybe the essex lady said it as a gag, to see if she would do it. Jack, if your reading, your taste buds wil be improved

This has always baffled me. I'm not on a £20 per week food budget, but I plan our meals, shop accordingly and only very rarely have random bits of veg that need using up. I also don't usually have leftovers, apart from when I deliberately make extra for lunch the next day.

This sounds very regimented, but of course there's flexibility and things change. Still, never found a sad little leek in my fridge.

She has no idea how to shop/ budget properly. She just buys everything with a yellow sticker and then tries to make maverick things with it. When we had a very strict budget I would buy food for the week and never throw a single thing away. Here in the desert things don't keep very long so a weekly shop doesn't work (and we aren't broke), but I still try not to waste food by only buying what we actually need.

 

[Starsanddaggers]

Her kitchen is so much bigger than any of the kitchens I've ever had private renting.
I can't believe ( well I can believe) she says it's small??!!?

 

[Harrybosch]

Every time she whines about the smol kitchen, I’m minded of Rachel Khoo and the amazing meals she made in that tiny ‘Paris Kitchen’.

I used to have a smol, smol kitchen for many years. As tiny as Trump's hands. At the time I followed a lot of New York-apartment-based vegan bloggers, because their recipes could all be achieved with two gas rings, a tiny sink, a chopping board, a decent knife, a wooden spoon and a blender (vegan staple in the early 2010s).

 

[Ellabella]

I have a small kitchen and it has zero impact on my ability to cook delicious meals. Obviously a big kitchen diner would be lovely, but a tit cook in a large fancy kitchen does not turn them into a good cook.

A few years ago I burnt my kitchen down (was as hideous as you'd imagine) and I only had a borrowed two ring induction hob and a microwave for 6 months, I was still able to cook from scratch pretty much all the time.

 

[Tabitha D]

Gosh, I didn’t know that Allegra was married before Jack - to Susi Smithers from 2006 - 2012. I note that there’s a recipe for ‘F*** Me Dauphinoise’ in her first cookbook though! Jack is such a copycat with her ‘Come To Bed’ whatever it was! Parmigiana!

Allegra McEvedy: ‘I’d be happy never to see another f***ing

Losing her mother’s recipe book was a terrible blow to Allegra McEvedy. As she recreates it for her daughter, the chef talks to Alison Roberts about drugs, divorce and Dauphinois

www.standard.co.uk

Wow. It just goes to show how Jack hasn’t an original thought in her head. Allegra must be rolling her eyes.

View attachment 381226View attachment 381227
Interesting that she had the shot all ready for the first meal she could taste. And what the f would all of those things taste like together?!

In what way is that carrotty mush “pesto”, exactly? Does it share even a single ingredient with actual pesto? She knows absolutely duck all about food.

 

[YenE]

She probably uses her teeny tiny smol manic pixie wings to flutter up and get things.

Ah of course I don’t have pixie wings alas I am but a mere regular short arse.

 

[NP]

Her kitchen is so much bigger than any of the kitchens I've ever had private renting.
I can't believe ( well I can believe) she says it's small??!!?

My RENTED kitchen is 2.3 x 2.4m. I have one tiny bit of worktop to use and still manage to produce food far more appetising that anything Jackie has produced. Her kitchen looks massive to me.