Jack Monroe #104 Are you familiar with my tip jar?

[PoorPatrol]

What about Fangirl Jack. Last seen when Taylor Swift dropped her new album and was trending on Twitter. Jack having never previously mentioned her before - or since - was the world's number 1 Swifty for a day or two

Or James Bond films, which she’s also not au fait with! She’s also randomly a Trekkie, completely coincidentally, straight after Nigella referenced

 

[Raker]

I am on a 7 page IncyGunk, nott sure if this has already been said.

Where are @Incywincy and @GrunkaLunka ? Lost in the space time continuum? Trapped in a soft cheese bog? Unable to overcome Brenda’s Bangers? Egg bound to an earlier thread? Speared to the past by the Almighty Splinter of Southend? Bubble buddied up into a lockdown they haven’t budgeted for? Hope all are ok xx

 

[BlendedSlop]

I know it was short-lived (even by Jack persona standards) but I'll always have a soft spot for Wholesome American Mom Jack, purely because of how batshit it was in the immediate aftermath of Eyegate.

 

[TurnedUpInTipp]

I know it was short-lived (even by Jack persona standards) but I'll always have a soft spot for Wholesome American Mom Jack, purely because of how batshit it was in the immediate aftermath of Eyegate.

Y'ALL JACK!

 

[Mustard]

Yeah, fake single Mom Jack.

 

[ChickenPorridge]

I know it was short-lived (even by Jack persona standards) but I'll always have a soft spot for Wholesome American Mom Jack, purely because of how batshit it was in the immediate aftermath of Eyegate.

I saw an American asking politely on her Insta what a yellow sticker salad was. Giving that they're her "second largest audience" you would think she'd be a bit more considerate wouldn't you.

 

[Minky McMoneypenny]

At the end of the last thread, there was this - can someone explain it to me because I don't understand the trigger warnings bit.

PS - I've had to make a massive pan of curry/dhal slop today because the door on the Brexit freezer was left ajar and I had a load of defrosted veg. As I was bunging chopped peppers (reduced price), wonky cauliflower, onions and lentils in the cauldron, I was silently cursing that woman. However, my slop looks edible and tastes good and has made enough to feed about 15 people (bloody hell, it's even vegan!!)

 

[Flash]

View attachment 308533

Just take it the duck back and get a bleeping refund. Or put it in the bin and get in there yourself while you’re at it squiggle. Do us all a favour and take Jack with you. Thankyou and duck off x

 

[Alansbigplate]

Or James Bond films, which she’s also not au fait with! She’s also randomly a Trekkie, completely coincidentally, straight after Nigella referenced

Feel like she’s maybe also claimed to love the work of Celine Dion too and can perfectly hold a note but maybe that was Shout by Lulu

 

[NP]

duck sake, Squiggle.

 

[Lastoftheflumps]

Totally disappointed that she didn’t resurrect Benedict Cumberscotch in honour of the ...........

SCOTLAND RESULT!!!!

(It’s been 22 years).

 

[maytoseptember]

I think food hygiene should be top of the list she regularly freezes, reheats etc, feeds uncooked flour, and we won’t mention the hand washing, food on floor, polluted cutlery drawer, the rusty knives, she does not have a clue what the words mean.

You forgot broken glass over the floor that she frequently treads on.

 

[BashmentLady]

SCOTLAND RESULT!!!!

(It’s been 22 years).

 

[Cookiecookie]

What does "smol" even mean?

Ikkle wikkle and small. Jack likes to imagine herself (one incarnation anyway) as a 'smol bean' - little cute thing. She is, as ever, wrong!

 

[HotesTilaire]

Kittens are smol. It needs to be both small and adorable to qualify.
Can “pupper” get in the bin with doggo and holibobs (presumably next to “nom nom”, may it never return)
My fave Jack is Zoe Eccentricity.
Behaviour - pretend “bum dial” text writing nonsense with a perfectly formed name in the middle.
Change name to “surprise nonsense name” for an hour.
Habitat- in an attention vacuum
Edit- I’m just bad at typing tbh

 

[Mustard]

Kittens are smol. It needs to be both small and adorable to qualify.
Can “pupper” get in the bin with doggo and holibobs (presumably next to “nom nom”, may it never return)
My fave Jack is Zoe Eccentricity.
Behaviour - pretend “bum dial” text writing nonsense with a perfectly formed name in the middle.
Change name to “surprise nonsense name” for an hour.
Habitat- in an attention vacuum
Edit- I’m just bad at typing tbh

I think of smol as a word used by Millenials and GenZ’ers.

Bum dial is Anglo version of butt dial which I would have expected JM to use.

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

I thought smol was eco friendly laundry detergent. I don't have a favourite Jack as I think they are all equally despicable but all this talk of multiple Jacks and the knowledge that she has had so many different looks makes me wonder about a multiple personality disorder.

 

[HotesTilaire]

I thought smol was eco friendly laundry detergent. I don't have a favourite Jack as I think they are all equally despicable but all this talk of multiple Jacks and the knowledge that she has had so many different looks makes me wonder about a multiple personality disorder.

It is a laundry product- it is small but apart from that a dumb name choice.
I’m neither American or Jack so I say bum-dial!
She does not seem to display traits of dissociative identity disorder, as multiple personality is known in medical terms. To be fair it’s us who named the different behaviours as personalities, not Jack.

 

[Puddy Muddle]

Grunking so apologies if this has been said (I'm on the other side of the world! THE SUN LEFT! NOW duck OFF!), but that 2014 article shows pretty clearly Jack's early awareness of the disconnect between reality and her narrative, and her attempts to marry them. See how she tries to shift focus from/retcon anything that has visual evidence?

Exhibit A: tit. The mirror tiles are in the photo. They crawled out of a puddle, I swear! The rest of the place was a total shithole.

Exhibit B: tit. The photo makes the place look gorgeous. Because it is. BUT IT WAS PSYCHOLOGICALLY DAMAGING TO ME, A SEVERE INTROVERT.

Exhibit C: tit. They took a goddamn *video*. No way of finessing this one. Let's just zoom in on 'former', then. SHE LEFT. MY SHOES HAVE CLENCHED WITH STRESS.

As so many wiser Frauen have said, her problem now is that there is simply too much evidence everywhere, mostly thanks to her inability to stop blurting every detail of her life all over the place. No way at all to manage things when there is just so much out there. And thus 104 forensic Tattle thread were born.

 

[Sooverthat]

How about Cor Blimey Guv’nor working class urchin Jack?

Stop you know this is going to trigger her. We will be hearing all the memories of her past in school plays, like Oliver, never once imagining it would be her reality in years to come.

Perhaps her recipe development is heavily influenced by her Oliver experience. Explains everything looking like gruel. I'm sure we have said before what wonderful skills she has as a method actor.