Bad form to quote myself but just wanted to confess the costing for the above post were pulled out of my arse (I did a Jack)
Jack Monroe #101 The bubble bursts
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She's done up her website again. It looks a lot better (if you ignore the content of the photos).
...oh wait. On the actual recipe pages, the text is unreadably small for many people on mobile and the begging message is still duplicated. That's R Jackie!
...oh wait. On the actual recipe pages, the text is unreadably small for many people on mobile and the begging message is still duplicated. That's R Jackie!
This, however, is still there. At the end she nearly calls ITV Channel 3, "giving away how old she is". Channel 3 became ITV in 1990. JM was one year old.
I honestly don’t care if she’s back with her ex or not. Jack Monroe and ex get back together, really not a huge deal.
What I find baffling is all the mystery around who her bubble buddy is given that she spills so much of her life on Twitter.
She gets more tedious and irrelevant by the day, seriously, if you need her to tell you what to do with some left over mash and a bit of blue cheese something really is wrong.
Her food is getting worse as well. A long time ago I used to look at some of her recipes and think, I might make that.
Not now. She tries too hard to be quirky and it shows
What I find baffling is all the mystery around who her bubble buddy is given that she spills so much of her life on Twitter.
She gets more tedious and irrelevant by the day, seriously, if you need her to tell you what to do with some left over mash and a bit of blue cheese something really is wrong.
Her food is getting worse as well. A long time ago I used to look at some of her recipes and think, I might make that.
Not now. She tries too hard to be quirky and it shows
I know the “this looks like tit / sick” jokes are v obvious but honestly, there isn’t anything else this could possibly be...? Surely?
I hope that was a communal skip in a driveway somewhere in Southend...Long time lurker since she LEFT. Finally made an account. Not a squiggle. Confession.....I bought Vegan(ish), made one recipe and put it in the skip
Unlikely to contribute much as I'm very BUSY.
No no no she didn’t do it, that chap did, her friend
Quoting myself like a dick, but I've been the spreader of fake news. Seems like ITV was always ITV? Wikipedia is unclear. I'm a foreign Frau and wasnt here in the 60s, 70s, 80s or 90s. I also dong really care, but I suspect Jack is taking shite.
I keep watching them. “James, how do I do this?” “Oh there’s my garden”. It’s truly brilliantHow cheeky too talking about us as if we didn’t make up over 50% of her Hellman’s Insta live audience?
As if we’re not 60% of her top google search terms?
As if we’re not her core audience now, don’t do us down like this
Looks like dear heart has been taking our advice! Receipts attached. The website is no longer absolute trash, provided you’re on desktop. As you’ve experienced it’s basically a write off on mobile, which is where most web traffic comes from these days
Jack pls just pay a developer - use Louisa’s cash now you’ve got it back?Attachments
she’ll get back to you on that one
Yes the font is far too small - it’s virtually impossible to read.
Also, the “search” box is right at the bottom of the page. Whereas it should be right at the top, as people visiting the site will normally want to search for something. (See Jamie’s and Nigella’s sites for how it’s done, Jack).
It’s just all a bit cack handed.
I watched this whilst putting together a lesson plan on Magna Carta (mega
) I know which one I found more interesting. Why does she dooooo these things!?
My opinion is that that was fake ‘pretending to be a scared and nervous little girl who couldn’t take all the chances given to her because she’s shy’....it just looked really contrived with the hand-wringing and over-the-top quivery voice (you pre-recorded this video love, different scenario to live TV when a bit of nerves can be afforded).
So based on that video and the fact that I’m tired and a bit disillusioned with life, I have come to the conclusion that she ain’t no keyboard warrior - how she is on Twitter is how she is in real life - argumentative, snippy, manipulative and “pull the ladder up, I’m alright Jack”.
And at the risk of sounding totally like #moodylenny I don’t think the press have ever given you a moniker love, they’ll have taken something from your website or books - they’re just not that into you
Things that annoyed me about the recipe.
1. She was at her desk at 6.30 as though it was a big deal. Welcome to the world of work dear.
2. Oats are naturally gluten-free. Some people with severe allergies have to get ones that are made in factories without the risk of cross-contamination but oats do not contain gluten per se.
3. Do not blather about 2 or 3 servings of your 5 a day because, maths. Maths underpins everything in our world and you should learn to use it properly as a chef/cook for costings, recipes and your 5 a day mitherings.
I could rant about the gross adverts I keep seeing on the site but it is breakfast time.
1. She was at her desk at 6.30 as though it was a big deal. Welcome to the world of work dear.
2. Oats are naturally gluten-free. Some people with severe allergies have to get ones that are made in factories without the risk of cross-contamination but oats do not contain gluten per se.
3. Do not blather about 2 or 3 servings of your 5 a day because, maths. Maths underpins everything in our world and you should learn to use it properly as a chef/cook for costings, recipes and your 5 a day mitherings.
I could rant about the gross adverts I keep seeing on the site but it is breakfast time.
“Whatever moniker the press want to give me this week” ... she really fancies herself as some Uber-famous celebrity, no, on a par with say Victoria Beckham or Meghan Markle. ‘The press’ don’t talk about her and don’t create monikers for her, ever, let alone weekly, because she’s a nonentity. She’s a fantasist.
oh @JuliaGulia huge hugs. The whole experience sounds so awful.
[Also on a much more flippant note (jack-style whiplash...) I love saying your name out loud when you post. Watched the Wedding Singer with my 13year old over half term, we both loved it]
100% this, that’s why she sets her rabid Twitter monkeys on people. I really wouldn’t care about her coming to my front door cos like an slug or spider, she’s more scared of us than we are of them. However the fans are to be feared, anyone with the constitution to not only survive a JM dish but come back for more is not to be fucked with
I've been looking for these Hellman vids, can you share the links at all?
Cheers
oh my god I couldn’t get to the end of this, it’s TERRIBLE. “I’m such a shy kooky chaos and everyone begs me to be on tv but I’m too precious isn’t it charming?”
no! I’m cringing so hard and can’t believe she actually watched that and then put it online for people to see, that means she thinks it’s good. It is not good. Think she needs to re-evaluate what ‘starting to like myself more’ actually means, because this ain’t it.
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