Ioan Gruffudd and Alice Evans #56 I've got 99 filters but a pool filter ain't one

[Yel]

Those names or acronyms mean nothing to me I'm afraid!

Unless someone has 10k followers on social media they're generally off limits unless the person is sharing them on their own social media (so this bianca is ok to talk about as he's posting about her) - especially small accounts that insert themselves into drama for attention and want the promo from tattle. This is to stay out of grey areas for everyone's sake as tattle is talking about public figures, rather than members of the public.

I'm guessing this thread is a mess because Alice has gone?

 

[Penguin86]

Those names or acronyms mean nothing to me I'm afraid!

Unless someone has 10k followers on social media they're generally off limits unless the person is sharing them on their own social media - especially small accounts that insert themselves into drama for attention and want the promo from tattle. This is to stay out of grey areas for everyone's sake as tattle is talking about public figures, rather than members of the public.

I'm guessing this thread is a mess because Alice has gone?

The acronyms are used to not name people outright

 

[Yel]

The acronyms are used to not name people outright

If someone shouldn't be spoken about then they shouldn't be spoken about regardless of if their name is posted or if something cryptic is used - makes no difference.

see - https://tattle.life/threads/site-he...are-not-possible-ever-again.7217/post-8005303

 

[Nixlondon]

As the tumbleweeds roll through tattle, we plead "Alice come back & recommence battle"

 

[CookieMonsta]

Those names or acronyms mean nothing to me I'm afraid!

Unless someone has 10k followers on social media they're generally off limits unless the person is sharing them on their own social media (so this bianca is ok to talk about as he's posting about her) - especially small accounts that insert themselves into drama for attention and want the promo from tattle. This is to stay out of grey areas for everyone's sake as tattle is talking about public figures, rather than members of the public.

I'm guessing this thread is a mess because Alice has gone?

Thanks Yel. We definitely need AE to come back. Her being a Grade AAA bleep, the welfare of the kids and cuteness of the dogs are something we pretty much all agree on!

 

[IKickLikeKatya]

I'm entirely okay with AE never coming back to Twatter and being her usual toxic self. She'll undoubtedly continue to be the same exact total disaster, just more in private. If she can stay of Twatter is a whole other question. I'll miss some of the chat here but I think I'm willing to sacrifice it if AE has less venom aimed at people in public

 

[Babsi]

Those names or acronyms mean nothing to me I'm afraid!

Unless someone has 10k followers on social media they're generally off limits unless the person is sharing them on their own social media (so this bianca is ok to talk about as he's posting about her) - especially small accounts that insert themselves into drama for attention and want the promo from tattle. This is to stay out of grey areas for everyone's sake as tattle is talking about public figures, rather than members of the public.

I'm guessing this thread is a mess because Alice has gone?

Exactly this. With mAlice being (relatively) quiet and Ioan and Bianca being (as usual) low-key and discrete, there's really nothing much going on except for mAlice fishing for sympathy on Cameo and for praise on Instagram with pictures of her kids, which raises (justified) outrage with many of us. Which is why I suggest we stop clogging the thread with the re-hashing of things that have been discussed more than enough and dial things back a bit. Would give newbies a chance to review the 55(!!!) old threads to get up to speed so we don't have to be repeating all the time. And for those of us who've been here for a while and are (over)invested, it would be a chance to get back to RL ... at least until February 7, when she will probably be back with guns a-blazing. ;-)

 

[welp]

I reckon she will quickly log in and disappear again to extent it for another 30 days, probably we wont even notice lol

 

[M33L4]

I reckon she will quickly log in and disappear again to extent it for another 30 days, probably we wont even notice lol

It’s Alice there’ll be something dramatic like “IOAN IS STILL SILENCING ME” or “THE TROLLS ARE TOO MUCH”
Then shut down again while she makes sly digs on Insta

Sorry @welp not accepting that. You notice everything. Thank the Lord

 

[Autisteuse]

I’ve finally (mostly) caught up on this thread, after real life intruded and kept me away for a few days. It’s depressing, but utterly predictable, how AE is using the Es as pawns on SM. It gives me a feeling of emptiness when I think about what it must feel like for the girls to live in that messy house with her, probably having to fend for themselves at mealtime, reaching out for emotional connection and finding Mommy with her face glued to her phone or iPad yet again. They must miss their father desperately, deep down.

I wonder who is supporting those poor children? Their situation is just horrible. Alice told them he was leaving them - something you should never do to a child; relationships break up, but those kids are forever - and since then has been alienating them from him. What must their daily lives be like, with an alcoholic pill-popper addicted to social media, Ella being old enough to read the vicious and vindictive things her mother says? Who protects them during her rants? Who does their laundry, checks their homework, makes sure they've brushed their teeth and hair, and cares for them when they've had a bad dream? Who is their shoulder to cry on when IG and BW are in the tabloids and Alice melts down? With whom can they discuss their emotions and pain? Ella is heading for puberty; who is going to be guiding her through that difficult time? When are they allowed to talk about themselves and their emotions without Alice shoehorning her drama into the conversation and making it all about her? Are they even allowed to mention their father's name? Who would have calmed them down after Alice blurted out her noxious 'dream' about BW killing them? What DOES she say to them day-in, day-out; how lonely they must be when she is on a bender. It makes me want to weep.

 

[CarrierPigeon]

Coming back on here today I agree that this thread is a mess now. Before I took a step back I was in danger of doing exactly what I was accusing AE of doing - being overly invested in someone else’s decision-making and spending too much time on my phone!

 

[amethyst_unicorn]

On p24 and things seem a bit heated over the past couple of days.

Not trying to moderate, just saying, you guys know we had a full moon this week?
Might account for some of the heightened emotions ...

And back on topic, AE is still bat tit crazy

 

[Lotus Flower]

I wonder who is supporting those poor children? Their situation is just horrible. Alice told them he was leaving them - something you should never do to a child; relationships break up, but those kids are forever - and since then has been alienating them from him. What must their daily lives be like, with an alcoholic pill-popper addicted to social media, Ella being old enough to read the vicious and vindictive things her mother says? Who protects them during her rants? Who does their laundry, checks their homework, makes sure they've brushed their teeth and hair, and cares for them when they've had a bad dream? Who is their shoulder to cry on when IG and BW are in the tabloids and Alice melts down? With whom can they discuss their emotions and pain? Ella is heading for puberty; who is going to be guiding her through that difficult time? When are they allowed to talk about themselves and their emotions without Alice shoehorning her drama into the conversation and making it all about her? Are they even allowed to mention their father's name? Who would have calmed them down after Alice blurted out her noxious 'dream' about BW killing them? What DOES she say to them day-in, day-out; how lonely they must be when she is on a bender. It makes me want to weep.

It’s terrible, isn’t it? The older E may have been parentified by now, too, if the image that AE inadvertently portrays on SM about what’s going on in that household is correct. My biggest desire is to see the Es reunited with IG. I hope that he gets a court order soon regarding custody that orders a reunification schedule and sets out consequences if AE fails to follow it. AE also needs to be ordered to attend parenting classes.

Spoiler: Spoiler: Autisteuse

I read what you wrote about your family earlier in the thread, and I am so sorry that you and your family have been through that trauma. I agree that there are some things that simply shouldn’t be joked about. Sending you hugs and well wishes for the difficult time you went through

 

[Autisteuse]

It’s terrible, isn’t it? The older E may have been parentified by now, too, if the image that AE inadvertently portrays on SM about what’s going on in that household is correct. My biggest desire is to see the Es reunited with IG. I hope that he gets a court order soon regarding custody that orders a reunification schedule and sets out consequences if AE fails to follow it. AE also needs to be ordered to attend parenting classes.

I think you're quite right about Ella being parentified. Alice has made it clear that, despite her self-proclaimed feminist credentials, she prefers to be helpless and rely heavily on others. She has conditions that may or may not exist, which make her more helpless still. I myself was parentified from the age of eleven onwards - my mother got so tired of my father's crap, his violence and abuse that she went off and did another university degree and started a career, which unfortunately meant that I was in charge of cooking, cleaning, and him. To have to look after a great baby, blubbing about their sad life and their horrible parents and all the people who were ever unkind to them, is both nauseating and exhausting. It took me years to recover, and I still shiver involuntarily when I remember having to sit by him night after night while he drank through three bottles of wine, weeping about 'his childhood'. (What about mine? Why wasn't I allowed to have one?) Ella seems to be in very much the same precarious and exhausting situation, and I genuinely fear what that will do to her emotional development and mental health as an adult. Alice is too self-centred to take any censure, blame or responsibility, so it all falls on Ella's frail shoulders. I bet that she is Alice's sounding board, treated like a co-conspirator and being told that 'as she's so mature', Alice will share all the inappropriate and gory details about her marriage with IG, even their former sex life.
I sadly don't think that parenting classes would make a whit of difference to Alice. Narcissists will never admit that they are in the wrong or improve any aspect of their behaviour, so, even if she did attend, she'd eyeroll her way through it and continue making the same damned mistakes.
ETA - also, with the courts as backed up as they are, it sadly seems that the PA will continue indefinitely, as will Alice witholding the children.

 

[EllaBella89]

I wonder who is supporting those poor children? Their situation is just horrible. Alice told them he was leaving them - something you should never do to a child; relationships break up, but those kids are forever - and since then has been alienating them from him. What must their daily lives be like, with an alcoholic pill-popper addicted to social media, Ella being old enough to read the vicious and vindictive things her mother says? Who protects them during her rants? Who does their laundry, checks their homework, makes sure they've brushed their teeth and hair, and cares for them when they've had a bad dream? Who is their shoulder to cry on when IG and BW are in the tabloids and Alice melts down? With whom can they discuss their emotions and pain? Ella is heading for puberty; who is going to be guiding her through that difficult time? When are they allowed to talk about themselves and their emotions without Alice shoehorning her drama into the conversation and making it all about her? Are they even allowed to mention their father's name? Who would have calmed them down after Alice blurted out her noxious 'dream' about BW killing them? What DOES she say to them day-in, day-out; how lonely they must be when she is on a bender. It makes me want to weep.

I really hope they have some friends and friends families that will help ease the burden of what’s happening. When my grandmother would go on benders I was left largely alone to fend for myself, that’s if she wasn’t being abusive and having strange drunk men in our home, but the difference was this was pretty much always the case so it was all I knew and I grew up pretty quickly, I went from eating sachets of ketchup because I was hungry to learning how to run a house. I would spend a lot of time at friends houses, and that would be a welcome reprieve and give me a sense of normality. I’m guessing the girls would’ve had their dad as a stabilising element in their lives, so it’s a bit of a rug being pulled from underneath them. It honestly is so terribly sad and I desperately just want to hug them and tell them everything will be okay (again, something that will be twisted and taken terribly out of context by Alice if she’s scrolling here) I hope IG is focusing on the girls and their well-being above all else. It’s all very well to have a new girlfriend, but if your estranged kids are being left with an unstable alcoholic that cannot care for herself or the home, then this needs to be the top priority. I’m hoping he’s doing his best to reach out to them and reassure them that he loves them and hasn’t left them. I’m fairly neutral on here but where the children are concerned, that’s when I start to feel angry, as I know the damage someone like Alice can cause. My hope is that Ioan returns to the UK, so the girls can reconnect with their grandparents, and so he can get work. Alice would be better off here too.
Thank you for articulating that beautifully, @Autisteuse, you have such a way with words and I feel your empathy and kind soul whenever I read your posts

 

[Mariska]

I really hope they have some friends and friends families that will help ease the burden of what’s happening. When my grandmother would go on benders I was left largely alone to fend for myself, that’s if she wasn’t being abusive and having strange drunk men in our home, but the difference was this was pretty much always the case so it was all I knew and I grew up pretty quickly, I went from eating sachets of ketchup because I was hungry to learning how to run a house. I would spend a lot of time at friends houses, and that would be a welcome reprieve and give me a sense of normality. I’m guessing the girls would’ve had their dad as a stabilising element in their lives, so it’s a bit of a rug being pulled from underneath them. It honestly is so terribly sad and I desperately just want to hug them and tell them everything will be okay (again, something that will be twisted and taken terribly out of context by Alice if she’s scrolling here) I hope IG is focusing on the girls and their well-being above all else. It’s all very well to have a new girlfriend, but if your estranged kids are being left with an unstable alcoholic that cannot care for herself or the home, then this needs to be the top priority. I’m hoping he’s doing his best to reach out to them and reassure them that he loves them and hasn’t left them. I’m fairly neutral on here but where the children are concerned, that’s when I start to feel angry, as I know the damage someone like Alice can cause. My hope is that Ioan returns to the UK, so the girls can reconnect with their grandparents, and so he can get work. Alice would be better off here too.
Thank you for articulating that beautifully, @Autisteuse, you have such a way with words and I feel your empathy and kind soul whenever I read your posts

Im sorry you went through that as a child, that’s awful x

 

[ButterTart]

I reckon she will quickly log in and disappear again to extent it for another 30 days, probably we wont even notice lol

I fully believe this is what she is doing. No way would she take a 30 days seriously, so she is likely doing the log in/deactivate to extend it.

 

[Autisteuse]

I really hope they have some friends and friends families that will help ease the burden of what’s happening. When my grandmother would go on benders I was left largely to fend for myself, but the difference was this was pretty much always the case so it was all I knew and I grew up pretty quickly, I went from eating sachets of ketchup because I was hungry to learning how to run a house. I would spend a lot of time at friends houses, and that would be a welcome reprieve and give me a sense of normality. I’m guessing the girls would’ve had their dad as a stabilising element in their lives, so it’s a bit of a rug being pulled from underneath them. It’s honestly is so terribly sad and I desperately just want to hug them and tell them everything will be okay (again, something that will be twisted and taken out of context by Alice if she’s scrolling here) I hope IG is focusing on the girls and their well-being above all else. It’s all very well to have a new girlfriend, but if your estranged kids are being left with an unstable alcoholic that cannot care for herself or the home, then this needs to be the top priority. I’m hoping he’s doing his best to reach out to them and reassure them that he loves them and hasn’t left them. I’m fairly neutral on here but where the children are concerned, that’s when I start to feel angry, as I know the damage someone like Alice can cause. My hope is that Ioan returns to the UK, so the girls can reconnect with their grandparents, and so he can get work. Alice would be better off here too.
Thank you for articulating that beautifully, @Autisteuse, you have such a way with words and I feel your empathy and kind soul whenever I read your posts

I'm desperately sorry that you had to face such neglect, EB. And I so admire you for having the fortitude and mental courage to take the situation by the scruff of the neck and turn it into something positive, developing skills and resilience along the way. It really is admirable. How have you coped in the long run, if I may ask? (You're under no obligation to reply if it is too difficult and personal to respond; I'm honestly thinking about the longterm outcome for Ella, as your situations seem similar.) I too hope that IG is doing his absolute damndest to help those girls and reclaim the warm, solid relationship that he had with them in earlier days. Alice's behaviour is so malicious, despicable and toxic that it will take a great deal of effort to undo the damage; they will probably need heavy duty counselling both individually and as part of a family unit. I also agree that he should return to the UK; it will be healthier for the girls, he will get a lot more work, and they'll be away from the toxic, sycophantic, sleazy lovefest that is the Hollywood idyll.
May I return the comment and say that I always like and value your posts? You have a wonderful, clear way of expressing yourself, and I really admire your ability to remain neutral in the face of chaos!! xxx

 

[Lotus Flower]

I think you're quite right about Ella being parentified. Alice has made it clear that, despite her self-proclaimed feminist credentials, she prefers to be helpless and rely heavily on others. She has conditions that may or may not exist, which make her more helpless still. I myself was parentified from the age of eleven onwards - my mother got so tired of my father's crap, his violence and abuse that she went off and did another university degree and started a career, which unfortunately meant that I was in charge of cooking, cleaning, and him. To have to look after a great baby, blubbing about their sad life and their horrible parents and all the people who were ever unkind to them, is both nauseating and exhausting. It took me years to recover, and I still shiver involuntarily when I remember having to sit by him night after night while he drank through three bottles of wine, weeping about 'his childhood'. (What about mine? Why wasn't I allowed to have one?) Ella seems to be in very much the same precarious and exhausting situation, and I genuinely fear what that will do to her emotional development and mental health as an adult. Alice is too self-centred to take any censure, blame or responsibility, so it all falls on Ella's frail shoulders. I bet that she is Alice's sounding board, treated like a co-conspirator and being told that 'as she's so mature', Alice will share all the inappropriate and gory details about her marriage with IG, even their former sex life.
I sadly don't think that parenting classes would make a whit of difference to Alice. Narcissists will never admit that they are in the wrong or improve any aspect of their behaviour, so, even if she did attend, she'd eyeroll her way through it and continue making the same damned mistakes.
ETA - also, with the courts as backed up as they are, it sadly seems that the PA will continue indefinitely, as will Alice witholding the children.

I think you are quite right that AE won’t ever change; I think the main benefit of parenting classes would be to impose legal, objective boundaries that she learns she’s not allowed to cross. It’s common for courts to order parenting classes, and to have parents sign documents stating that they will not speak negatively about the co-parent to the children, that they won’t discuss the details of the divorce with the childre, etc—any measures that the court feels are necessary to put a stop to parental alienation. She will hate it, but she’ll probably be legally obliged to follow those rules, or suffer consequences that the court can impose. Which, of course, is the only way a narcissist will ever change their behavior—when they are forced to, because they’ll suffer negative consequences otherwise.

I‘m so sorry that you experienced such suffering in childhood; it makes me want to give you a big hug through the computer screen! You are a remarkable person to have come through it with such tremendous empathy for others, that you demonstrate so often in your comments here. It cannot have been easy.

 

[ButterTart]

Re the latest Instagram posts, a ton of the comments are cooing about how wonderful a mother AE is. Yes, she believes that shows there is no PA, but it also feeds her massive ego. Since she is moderating comments, no risk of anything critical sneaking in.