HRH Markle invested in this Instant Stoat Milk Latte scam, and now everyone's advised to avoid these fake "wellness drinks" packed with lead, carcinogens, adaptogens, magic mushrooms, ethical bat droppings and steroids - get yours here!
Best of all, produced by Women in the Far East on 30p an hour! Or 50 Cents!!!
What's not to like!!
$4.50 per shot, in aid of Enforced Far East Womens Labour. Pay here!
By
TANYA SHARMA FOR DAILYMAIL.COM
Things blew up when Meghan sent to her old enemy Porker a holiday gift basket containing these contaminated products, and the WeightWatchers scammer was shortly afterwards lifted by crane into intensive care in Santa Barbara Cottage Hospital.
This was a sweet nod to where her Goddaughter NoLegsLil Hewitt-Mountebank-Dyer was not born after an emergency caesarian, underwater birth, laughing gas, drips and multiple epidurals supervised by none other than His Royal Sphincter the Duke of Essex.
Haddock Goop candles were lit, and Ob-Gyn Stoat crooned as he sucked on magic toadstools and laughing gas to draw the spirit of mummy into the room. Doctor Stoat Sphincter then skilfully eased his imaginary daughter into the world ensuring that the first face she saw was his Rhodent Visage.........
The Ho immediately rose from the birthing pool, shook off the drips, gas mask, bandages and epudural lines. The Royals were whisked from Portland Hospital or Lindo Wing by armoured car flanked by MI5 outriders to the roar of cheering crowds lining the streets, with the Stoat in the back shrieking and pointing, as high as a kite
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