For anybody struggling ❤

[It’s The Truman Show]

Thank you and @Jwren too xx
Just everything at the moment I feel so lonely although I have a great partner and I have great friends and people around me I don’t feel happy. Sometimes I sit and think like when will it end.. will it end. Will I forever feel like this i can’t see a way out of it. I feel like a burden most of the time. I live with my mum because she went through a really messy divorce through the first lockdown and we moved in together.. got a mortgage together and when she was struggling I was the only one there. We did loads of stuff together and now she’s got this new social life with these new weird friends I’m a second thought. I come home from work and just sit in my room. I’m scared to ask her to go out with me because she always gives me a frosty reception or if we go out she’s always on her phone or she’s always got someone else she’d rather be taking too. My close friends all work and have busy lives. I only see my boyfriend at weekends because we live about 30/40 mins away from eachother now and it’s not practical during the week anymore. I don’t know I just feel like if I disappeared it wouldn’t matter.
Sorry for the long rant. I should have probably put it behind a spoiler.

Oh lovely
Maybe your mum thinks she might be spoiling your own vibe and life if she gets too involved ? Tell her how you feel. Do not be afraid to speak up. I’d love that so much if my kids did that to me.

 

[Dotty Merton]

Okay so worked up the courage to write this in a note and then it doesn’t feel so daunting to post

I found the NB case has really triggered something for me to the point I was reading the threads almost obsessively.

My mum was around the same age when she took her own life and there were some similarities - they even looked quite similar. She had a (very big) problem with alcohol and was going through menopause bought on by a hysterectomy. Not exactly the same, granted, but it’s definitely stirred something up for me.

Despite her being abusive and me spending what felt like my entire childhood trying to stop her from taking her own life, I still felt shocked and broken when she finally succeeded. I spent 15 years trying to bury much of that hurt and for some reason this being headline news has sent me on a spiral. I can’t eat, sleep or work. I feel utterly paralysed. It almost feels worse than when it originally happened and I can’t work out why everything from my childhood has come flooding back but it’s terrifying.

I’ve found so much comfort in reading your kind words and advice to each other. I’ve also used some of the advice you’ve given to others for myself and have a doctors appointment in a few weeks to go through what’s been going on.

I’m not sure what I wanted to gain from posting this, I guess it feels cathartic even just writing it out and acknowledging there’s an issue. And to thank you all for what you’ve unknowingly done to help me too.

So yeah, thank you! And huge love to anyone also struggling

How you doing? I hope you aren't too terrified tonight. You have company.

 

[InTheDollsHouse]

@☆MagicRoundabout☆ this thread was created towards the end of the NB ones, for those of us in there who wanted to carry on wider discussions because it was such a supportive and amazing group

Menopause was a hot (no pun intended) topic so I’m certain the ladies here will be able to help you xx
---
p.s. I’m off to the psych in a min but will check in properly later. Hope everyone is okay-ish

 

[☆MagicRoundabout☆]

@☆MagicRoundabout☆ this thread was created towards the end of the NB ones, for those of us in there who wanted to carry on wider discussions because it was such a supportive and amazing group

Menopause was a hot (no pun intended) topic so I’m certain the ladies here will be able to help you xx

Aww thank you my dear friend @InTheDollsHouse 🫂
I know you did a grand job on the NB thread and lovely to know everyone has continued friendships and support here
Hi everyone xxx

 

[InTheDollsHouse]

Aww thank you my dear friend @InTheDollsHouse 🫂
I know you did a grand job on the NB thread and lovely to know everyone has continued friendships and support here
Hi everyone xxx

There’s loads of menopause posts on the NB threads already but if you ask your questions in here there will definitely be some helpers xx

 

[Dotty Merton]

Aww thank you my dear friend @InTheDollsHouse 🫂
I know you did a grand job on the NB thread and lovely to know everyone has continued friendships and support here
Hi everyone xxx

Hi Magic, welcome to the gang, I'm a couple of years into using HRT now if I can be of any help.

 

[☆MagicRoundabout☆]

Hi lovely ladies!
So, I'm just wondering how many of you have been or going through perimenopause/menopause and taking HRT in the form of Provera tablets and Oestrogel?

I'm 50 and have struggled all my reproductive life with heavy bleeding. My medical issues are varied & complex, so I won't bore you with it all.
I have also been diagnosed with Adenomyosis (last year) and told I'm not a suitable candidate for a hysterectomy due to other health conditions.

I was placed on combined HRT last September (continuous Provera 10mg but can take up to 30mg per day) and the gel. All good.
10mg daily has, until today, stopped the bleeding since last September, which was up to twice a month. I'm due a Mirena fitting to replace the Provera in just over a week's time.
Yesterday, a migraine from hell I couldnt shift, bad tempered, hot, and painful cramps. This morning, I started bleeding.
Instructions from gynae were to increase Provera if bleeding wasn't controlled, so I have done, to 20mg (can go up to 30mg). Fingers
Like many, finding it hard and recently felt like shutting down, I'm sure many can relate.
Perimenopause isn't nice, at times I've felt like I've turned into a monster and hate being a woman, empty nest, calling myself a useless middle aged twit, and worse daily!

Sorry for my moan but if anyone else has gone through similar where they thought that was it, HRT has stopped all the crap and it's kicked off again unexpectedly, I'd be really interested to know the experience other women have had or are having
I have a follow up on 17th March with Gynae after my IUD fitting which I'm not looking forward to
Hugs to anyone struggling with their health and life in general xx
---

Hi Magic, welcome to the gang, I'm a couple of years into using HRT now if I can be of any help.

Thank you @Dotty Merton xx

 

[Jwren]

Hi lovely ladies!
So, I'm just wondering how many of you have been or going through perimenopause/menopause and taking HRT in the form of Provera tablets and Oestrogel?

I'm 50 and have struggled all my reproductive life with heavy bleeding. My medical issues are varied & complex, so I won't bore you with it all.
I have also been diagnosed with Adenomyosis (last year) and told I'm not a suitable candidate for a hysterectomy due to other health conditions.

I was placed on combined HRT last September (continuous Provera 10mg but can take up to 30mg per day) and the gel. All good.
10mg daily has, until today, stopped the bleeding since last September, which was up to twice a month. I'm due a Mirena fitting to replace the Provera in just over a week's time.
Yesterday, a migraine from hell I couldnt shift, bad tempered, hot, and painful cramps. This morning, I started bleeding.
Instructions from gynae were to increase Provera if bleeding wasn't controlled, so I have done, to 20mg (can go up to 30mg). Fingers
Like many, finding it hard and recently felt like shutting down, I'm sure many can relate.
Perimenopause isn't nice, at times I've felt like I've turned into a monster and hate being a woman, empty nest, calling myself a useless middle aged twit, and worse daily!

Sorry for my moan but if anyone else has gone through similar where they thought that was it, HRT has stopped all the crap and it's kicked off again unexpectedly, I'd be really interested to know the experience other women have had or having
I have a follow up on 17th March with Gynae after my IUD fitting which I'm not looking forward to
Hugs to anyone struggling with their health and life in general xx
---

Thank you @Dotty Merton xx

Hi Magic
I wish I could help but I haven’t taken HRT, I took a different path. The peri/menopause can be very challenging at times but it does get better. There‘s also a thread for menopause so they might be able to help if we can’t.
Hoping it’s sorted for you ASAP xx

Questions for those who have been through menopause

Did you find that your PMT symptoms were worse leading up to menopause (extra-angry, pain that lasted longer, etc.?) If you opted for HRT, how did you know you needed to go on it, and what sorts of things did it help you with? Once your periods stopped, did you find that all the PMT symptoms you...

tattle.life

 

[Squittel]

What do you guys think about women getting monthly leave for period related illness? I’ve heard some companies have started doing it and I’m sort of on the fence. I know some women who suffer from POS who would really benefit from it because their Periods are miserable and painful but I can imagine some people would take advantage. I get terrible PMT but it’s more mental suffering than physical (though I do get some pain, but nothing compared to when I was in my teens and 20s.)

 

[Toffeebythesea]

What do you guys think about women getting monthly leave for period related illness? I’ve heard some companies have started doing it and I’m sort of on the fence. I know some women who suffer from POS who would really benefit from it because their Periods are miserable and painful but I can imagine some people would take advantage. I get terrible PMT but it’s more mental suffering than physical (though I do get some pain, but nothing compared to when I was in my teens and 20s.)

I have endometriosis (or suspected, my mum and grandma have it and I've had multiple baby losses and 20 years of struggling since starting my period at 13, doctors have finally listened and I'm due the op soon for diagnosis)

My periods are awful. I have at least two days a month in agonising pain for ovulation (stomach cramps and leg pain), at least two days a month struggling with migraines and then at least three days of severe pain during my actual period. I've already had to take time off work in the past (not half as much as I've actually needed) due to periods which has gone against my attendance.

I think it's really beneficial that we get this time when needed, I really do. Why should our attendance be effected when we literally cannot help it? Same with miscarriage and menopausal leave! Sorry to hear that some of you are having a tricky day.

 

[InTheDollsHouse]

Might need to dip out for a couple of days my lovelies, just letting you know in case I’m not about, not to worry. Hope you are all hanging in there xx

 

[Toffeebythesea]

Might need to dip out for a couple of days my lovelies, just letting you know in case I’m not about, not to worry. Hope you are all hanging in there xx

Thinking of you take all the time you need. Xx

 

[puddleduck]

Might need to dip out for a couple of days my lovelies, just letting you know in case I’m not about, not to worry. Hope you are all hanging in there xx

Take care of you

 

[raspberryjuice]

Might need to dip out for a couple of days my lovelies, just letting you know in case I’m not about, not to worry. Hope you are all hanging in there xx

I’m mostly lurking on this thread as I’m not quite ready to share yet but I just wanted to send you a hug. I hope you’ll be ok after your time away. You’ve taken on a lot on here with the NB threads, alongside whatever you have going on “in the real world”, it’s understandable you’ll need a few days to focus on you. I’m sure everyone will be right here when you get back

 

[Mightbeasharpscratch]

I’m mostly lurking on this thread as I’m not quite ready to share yet but I just wanted to send you a hug. I hope you’ll be ok after your time away. You’ve taken on a lot on here with the NB threads, alongside whatever you have going on “in the real world”, it’s understandable you’ll need a few days to focus on you. I’m sure everyone will be right here when you get back

Amen to this. Take care, dolls. We’ll see you soon xx

 

[Kim Mild]

I'm struggling. I've posted before I feel quite down a lot of the time and often I attribute some of this to hormones or grief from a bereavement , which do play a part , but I think my youngest child has me broken.

My inlaws had my little 2 overnight ( first time in 4 months) and this morning I woke up and noticed the feeling of sadness and dread I usually have wasn't there.
Then I got a phone call to go and pick the kids up because they'd had a bad night , especially the little one . I get there and the kids appear fine , just a bit confused why they were going home already, as plans were grandparents would bring them home later. Little one has been moaning and complaining and tantrum all the time , which is basically what they are like all the time.

I never get a break and when I had a smidgen of one , I realised how much I need one . The sadness I feel comes from my environment making me sad . I feel like I have no support and no respite from the kids . My teenager helps a lot and is almost a grandparent substitute. I don't think my husband realises how bad I feel . I also gets the impression he finds the youngest challenging too.

My middle child never gets a look in because the littlest is always taking up all my time .

I remember reading the other thread and wishing I could just disappear too

 

[MeghanSnarkle]

What do you guys think about women getting monthly leave for period related illness? I’ve heard some companies have started doing it and I’m sort of on the fence. I know some women who suffer from POS who would really benefit from it because their Periods are miserable and painful but I can imagine some people would take advantage. I get terrible PMT but it’s more mental suffering than physical (though I do get some pain, but nothing compared to when I was in my teens and 20s.)

I honestly think the leave should be available if needed.

Ive been in some right states recently on the way to work and during my working hours due to heavy periods lucky I only do part time but at the risk of TMI on day 2 and 3 of my period I get flooding (I've had lots of tests and everything is always reassuringly negative but at a scan in december just gone they did detect a uterine fibroid so through a process of elimination that's seems to be the culprit) but honestly the panic I suffer as I'm walking to work it makes things flow quicker I just need to be near the toilet, I've also leaked at work (soz to any men here grossed out) but on just those two heavy days yeah I'm not going to lie if I had the choice I really would prefer to stay home

 

[Dotty Merton]

Hi lovely ladies!
So, I'm just wondering how many of you have been or going through perimenopause/menopause and taking HRT in the form of Provera tablets and Oestrogel?

I'm 50 and have struggled all my reproductive life with heavy bleeding. My medical issues are varied & complex, so I won't bore you with it all.
I have also been diagnosed with Adenomyosis (last year) and told I'm not a suitable candidate for a hysterectomy due to other health conditions.

I was placed on combined HRT last September (continuous Provera 10mg but can take up to 30mg per day) and the gel. All good.
10mg daily has, until today, stopped the bleeding since last September, which was up to twice a month. I'm due a Mirena fitting to replace the Provera in just over a week's time.
Yesterday, a migraine from hell I couldnt shift, bad tempered, hot, and painful cramps. This morning, I started bleeding.
Instructions from gynae were to increase Provera if bleeding wasn't controlled, so I have done, to 20mg (can go up to 30mg). Fingers
Like many, finding it hard and recently felt like shutting down, I'm sure many can relate.
Perimenopause isn't nice, at times I've felt like I've turned into a monster and hate being a woman, empty nest, calling myself a useless middle aged twit, and worse daily!

Sorry for my moan but if anyone else has gone through similar where they thought that was it, HRT has stopped all the crap and it's kicked off again unexpectedly, I'd be really interested to know the experience other women have had or are having
I have a follow up on 17th March with Gynae after my IUD fitting which I'm not looking forward to
Hugs to anyone struggling with their health and life in general xx
---

Thank you @Dotty Merton xx

I have always had heavy periods and after a few months using Evorel HRT patches (2 weeks estrogen/2 weeks prog/es) I started bleeding a couple of times a month and flooding awfully. I have actually taken to cutting my patches in half and haven't had a problem since. It has made me wonder if the lower dose patches are too much for some of us. In theory I should be having genetic testing for b/c this year to see if I can keep on with the HRT post 51 which feels a bit heavy to be dealing with and if I do have to stop what I will do then I don't know. If anyone has any experience with that I would appreciate a hello and what menopause vitamin support can we use? I am wary of any with soya because of the b/c risk.

I have heard fantastic things from women in peri who have the mirena, good luck with that. With the added issues of Adeno it must be a real struggle. I tend to have two good weeks a month and two weeks where I get quite wibbly. I cant wait til my periods finally stop I can bet you feel the same!

Interesting discussion about sick leave for periods. I would of needed at least a day off a month all my years, especially during school time. Bad cramps, in legs as well, flooding, I get slightly shaky for a day or 2 as well from the blood loss I thought. I'm fortunate to work from home now so can manage much better. What's the deal for girls still at school? That was such a difficult time for me I actually truanted so I didnt have to blob around school from class to class.

Love to all

 

[TwooTwooTwitTwitTwoo]

I found myself getting a bit stressed by some of the conversation on the NB thread because so many were saying HRT saved them and it all seems a bit horrific without it. I won't be able to take HRT so I must admit I'm quite anxious about my impeding doom .

Has anyone got any positive stories or advice about how they managed it without HRT?

 

[theleagueofgentlemen]

I found myself getting a bit stressed by some of the conversation on the NB thread because so many were saying HRT saved them and it all seems a bit horrific without it. I won't be able to take HRT so I must admit I'm quite anxious about my impeding doom .

Has anyone got any positive stories or advice about how they managed it without HRT?

Hey! So I followed the NB thread, and did want to ‘chip in’ with my experience but it felt wildly inappropriate due to the circumstances.
I’m genuinely not trying to rub this in anyone’s faces, and god FORBID anyone thinks I’m in any way trying to downplay their experiences because I swear to god that’s not my intention at all, and I’d be horrified if anyone thought that (hence my reluctance to post)
Menopause is different for everyone. But in all honestly (and again, please don’t anyone think this is a boast, or a brag, or anything of the sort because it’s truly not meant to be), I went through it with absolutely no help, or problems. I had absolutely no symptoms (other than lack of period, which is genuinely bleeping awesome)
Now I KNOW I’m probably in a minority. But sometimes it’s good to hear a ‘positive’ menopause story (at least that’s what I’m hoping my sharing my story is, because I’d truly be mortified if anyone thought this was in any way a boast or something)