Food & Drink #12 Willies and mash

[Begborrowsteal]

I was always so jealous of women like you! Before lockdown my hair needed washing every other day, and I mean NEEDED it was pretty much sliding off my scalp for the grease. Since lockdown I wash it once a week tops and even then it’s not as greasy as it used to be! Is it possible the outside triggers that much grease?! What the duck is out there

Oh I used to have to wash it every day. I was putting talc in my hair for school, before dry shampoo came out it gradually got better. After the kids, it also grew back curly its so bloody weird.

I'm clueless, man. Maybe stress too? Cant be dealing with being all slick faced!

 

[Flumps]

Evenin' all. I feel like I've been hit by a truck tonight. Absolutely wiped out, but my mum made me dinner when I picked the teen up this evening, so I am feeling looked after like you still want to be, even when you're 42. We have some weird family dynamics (who doesn't?) but as a little group we're all good in a crisis and home cooked food made by someone else was exactly what I wanted. As a bonus it was pork milanese and tomato pasta which is one of my most favourite dinners. MrF had a bad day and we had a very brief, fraught meeting, where in the end I basically sent him back to bed, which made me feel bad, but he looked so uncomfortable. He's feeling a bit better now, thankfully. This just feels like it's gone on long enough tbh.

Sorry for Dear Diary entry. Love, Flumps aged 42 and a half.

 

[chocolate choux]

@Begborrowsteal might be opening a can of worms here but I recommend reddit SkincareAddiction! Have learned so much from that place but as skincare is personal it’s worth doing some research, though it’s quite the rabbit hole to fall down

 

[Oxford_Girl]

Darling Canal

in terms of lockdown please remember we are all here for support but also there is help out there too

If you need help there is help out there please don’t suffer in silence. Reach out please talk to someone

Shout is the UK’s first 24/7 text service, free on all major mobile networks, for anyone in crisis anytime, anywhere. It’s a place to go if you’re struggling to cope and you need immediate help.
Text: 85258

Samaritans -Provides confidential, non-judgemental emotional support for people experiencing feelings of distress or despair, including those that could lead to suicide. You can phone, email, write a letter or in most cases talk to someone face to face.

Telephone: 116 123 (24 hours a day, free to call)


This is a lovely quick tasty easy Nadia recipe

Avocado pasta recipe

Avocados can create a creamy base for a pasta sauce that is healthy and vegan. A green giant of a dinner from Nadiya Hussain!

www.bbc.co.uk

I use water not oil and it is still lovely

 

[Universal]

Evenin' all. I feel like I've been hit by a truck tonight. Absolutely wiped out, but my mum made me dinner when I picked the teen up this evening, so I am feeling looked after like you still want to be, even when you're 42. We have some weird family dynamics (who doesn't?) but as a little group we're all good in a crisis and home cooked food made by someone else was exactly what I wanted. As a bonus it was pork milanese and tomato pasta which is one of my most favourite dinners. MrF had a bad day and we had a very brief, fraught meeting, where in the end I basically sent him back to bed, which made me feel bad, but he looked so uncomfortable. He's feeling a bit better now, thankfully. This just feels like it's gone on long enough tbh.

Sorry for Dear Diary entry. Love, Flumps aged 42 and a half.

Im a few years ahead and all I wanted was to be back at my mums house this afternoon. Todays food sounds lovely. Stay in your group
Hope Mr F is better.

 

[Suprise!]

Darling Canal

in terms of lockdown please remember we are all here for support but also there is help out there too

If you need help there is help out there please don’t suffer in silence. Reach out please talk to someone

Shout is the UK’s first 24/7 text service, free on all major mobile networks, for anyone in crisis anytime, anywhere. It’s a place to go if you’re struggling to cope and you need immediate help.
Text: 85258

Samaritans -Provides confidential, non-judgemental emotional support for people experiencing feelings of distress or despair, including those that could lead to suicide. You can phone, email, write a letter or in most cases talk to someone face to face.

Telephone: 116 123 (24 hours a day, free to call)


This is a lovely quick tasty easy Nadia recipe

Avocado pasta recipe

Avocados can create a creamy base for a pasta sauce that is healthy and vegan. A green giant of a dinner from Nadiya Hussain!

www.bbc.co.uk

I use water not oil and it is still lovely

What a great post, thanks @Oxford_Girl

Hope you’re ok @Flumps and MrFlumps, and others who might be struggling. x

 

[Readingismyhobby]

Shivi’s Ice Kitchen is £1.99 on Amazon if anyone is interested.
My tea was a lush tub of Ben &Jerrys icecream.

 

[Captainmouse]

Qi saying we are in The middle of amnarcissistic epidemic at the moment, they are obviously familiar with her work

 

[Captainmouse]

Qi saying we are in The middle of amnarcissistic epidemic at the moment, they are obviously familiar with her work

sorry didn’t see the typo it should say middle of a narcissistic epidemic

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Oh god guys a quick one for advice please:

I have a neighbour in her mid 80s. We met last year cos her house got broken into for car keys & our CCTV picked up footage, that night I went round with bits for her and ended up staying til 1am having a giggle she’s fab.

She wants me to come over and INTO HER HOUSE with baby! I texted her this morning saying I’d not forgive myself after seeing the graphs for over 60s plus I think it’s illegal (but kept it cute like who knows what the rules are anymore!). She’s texted me back saying we must come in & it would be impolite not to?

The thing is I get why she doesn’t give a duck, if I was 80 and my last years on earth were going to be so limited by covid I’d sooner live fast die young. But I also don’t particularly want to take baby in as I know this lady still sees her family? I’m going to stick to my guns and say drive because I can’t bear the guilt of it all but can I just have a signal boost that I’m doing the right thing please? Even typing this out helped xx

ETA sorry guys I’m crazy DEAR DIARY but I just texted her this, it’s so difficult and tit but I know what’s right and it’s not exposing an 84 year old to me and baby init

 

[blurstoftimes]

@heretoreaditall2019 oh nooo that is so awkward but your reply is absolutely lovely, what a nice neighbour you are! My grandma is the same, she's 90, lives in Vancouver and doesn't give a tit. She's been banned from her tennis club for refusing to wear a mask! I totally get why the oldies are fed up

Just having a coffee and scrolling through my work emails trying to desperately tie things up because I start jury service tomorrow and reckon I'll be on full furlough again by the end of the week! Sending love to everyone, this is so crap and the depressing weather doesn't help

 

[Grizzlybear]

Oh god guys a quick one for advice please:

I have a neighbour in her mid 80s. We met last year cos her house got broken into for car keys & our CCTV picked up footage, that night I went round with bits for her and ended up staying til 1am having a giggle she’s fab.

She wants me to come over and INTO HER HOUSE with baby! I texted her this morning saying I’d not forgive myself after seeing the graphs for over 60s plus I think it’s illegal (but kept it cute like who knows what the rules are anymore!). She’s texted me back saying we must come in & it would be impolite not to?

The thing is I get why she doesn’t give a duck, if I was 80 and my last years on earth were going to be so limited by covid I’d sooner live fast die young. But I also don’t particularly want to take baby in as I know this lady still sees her family? I’m going to stick to my guns and say drive because I can’t bear the guilt of it all but can I just have a signal boost that I’m doing the right thing please? Even typing this out helped xx

ETA sorry guys I’m crazy DEAR DIARY but I just texted her this, it’s so difficult and tit but I know what’s right and it’s not exposing an 84 year old to me and baby init

That’s so difficult! I think you’re doing the right thing. We are going to have to get so much better at laying down boundaries (and respecting them); because it’s not a Mrs Doyle esque “ah you will,” it’s actually a bloody deadly viral pandemic which is having such a lasting effect on mental health already. We need to be allowed to control who we see and where and define what makes us comfortable, because at least then it will alleviate one aspect of that anxiety. Stick to your guns, HTRIA - you’re not being mean, you’re doing exactly what you should be doing. Don’t let people take that security away from you.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

@heretoreaditall2019 oh nooo that is so awkward but your reply is absolutely lovely, what a nice neighbour you are! My grandma is the same, she's 90, lives in Vancouver and doesn't give a tit. She's been banned from her tennis club for refusing to wear a mask! I totally get why the oldies are fed up

Omg your nan looool! What a queen, the thing is I completely get why they wouldn’t want to adhere and I know I’d be out there fraternising if it were me. But also my MIL who’s mid 60s has been texting us what to do if she dies, my GIL (is that a thing?) is 97 and usually a bad witch but has lived in fear of covid I’ve had to arrange his lamb shanks delivery from across the country! So I feel I have a sense of responsibility to my OAP neighbour not to endanger her even if she doesn’t see the danger? I’m 29 so still just in the highest risk groups who are giving it out to others!

I got a bit of a crappy message back that’s bothered me but tbh I will take the half hour that upsets me over the hours in her house in fear & then terrified for 2 weeks after? Also old ppl don’t always understand tone in texts so she may not have meant it. I spoke to my sister who was like duck that £10k fine, also I don’t want her to die obviously but then an investigation to happen and I’ve gotta explain to her kids why I didn’t give a duck were in tier two and days from a proper lock down?! :/

Thank you guys sorry I just hate the situations this throws up! Also I love a chat with my neighbours I used to end up gone all night after work used to wind my husband up Usually spend Christmas Eve with next door too that’ll be in the bin this year

 

[Dustye]

Oh god guys a quick one for advice please:

I have a neighbour in her mid 80s. We met last year cos her house got broken into for car keys & our CCTV picked up footage, that night I went round with bits for her and ended up staying til 1am having a giggle she’s fab.

She wants me to come over and INTO HER HOUSE with baby! I texted her this morning saying I’d not forgive myself after seeing the graphs for over 60s plus I think it’s illegal (but kept it cute like who knows what the rules are anymore!). She’s texted me back saying we must come in & it would be impolite not to?

The thing is I get why she doesn’t give a duck, if I was 80 and my last years on earth were going to be so limited by covid I’d sooner live fast die young. But I also don’t particularly want to take baby in as I know this lady still sees her family? I’m going to stick to my guns and say drive because I can’t bear the guilt of it all but can I just have a signal boost that I’m doing the right thing please? Even typing this out helped xx

ETA sorry guys I’m crazy DEAR DIARY but I just texted her this, it’s so difficult and tit but I know what’s right and it’s not exposing an 84 year old to me and baby init

You definitely did the right thing! I had a similar situation last week, the group of NCT mums I'm in are organising a Christmas party in a couple of weeks at a local indoor soft play place. This was before the lockdown announcement but we were in Tier 2 so definitely against the rules. And most of these mums work for the NHS or are teachers so you think they'd have more sense!

 

[Flumps]

Oh god guys a quick one for advice please:

I have a neighbour in her mid 80s. We met last year cos her house got broken into for car keys & our CCTV picked up footage, that night I went round with bits for her and ended up staying til 1am having a giggle she’s fab.

She wants me to come over and INTO HER HOUSE with baby! I texted her this morning saying I’d not forgive myself after seeing the graphs for over 60s plus I think it’s illegal (but kept it cute like who knows what the rules are anymore!). She’s texted me back saying we must come in & it would be impolite not to?

The thing is I get why she doesn’t give a duck, if I was 80 and my last years on earth were going to be so limited by covid I’d sooner live fast die young. But I also don’t particularly want to take baby in as I know this lady still sees her family? I’m going to stick to my guns and say drive because I can’t bear the guilt of it all but can I just have a signal boost that I’m doing the right thing please? Even typing this out helped xx

ETA sorry guys I’m crazy DEAR DIARY but I just texted her this, it’s so difficult and tit but I know what’s right and it’s not exposing an 84 year old to me and baby init

What everyone else said, basically. You've got to decide what you're comfortable with and stick with it. FWIW I think you're doing the right thing, but like you I can see where she's coming from too. Your text is lovely and kind, I think you've got the tone right there. xx

Omg your nan looool! What a queen, the thing is I completely get why they wouldn’t want to adhere and I know I’d be out there fraternising if it were me. But also my MIL who’s mid 60s has been texting us what to do if she dies, my GIL (is that a thing?) is 97 and usually a bad witch but has lived in fear of covid I’ve had to arrange his lamb shanks delivery from across the country! So I feel I have a sense of responsibility to my OAP neighbour not to endanger her even if she doesn’t see the danger? I’m 29 so still just in the highest risk groups who are giving it out to others!

I got a bit of a crappy message back that’s bothered me but tbh I will take the half hour that upsets me over the hours in her house in fear & then terrified for 2 weeks after? Also old ppl don’t always understand tone in texts so she may not have meant it. I spoke to my sister who was like duck that £10k fine, also I don’t want her to die obviously but then an investigation to happen and I’ve gotta explain to her kids why I didn’t give a duck were in tier two and days from a proper lock down?! :/

Thank you guys sorry I just hate the situations this throws up! Also I love a chat with my neighbours I used to end up gone all night after work used to wind my husband up Usually spend Christmas Eve with next door too that’ll be in the bin this year

Also, hopefully her kids will say the same thing to her if she mentions it to them. If they hear about it, pretty sure they will be on your side in this.

 

[blurstoftimes]

Omg your nan looool! What a queen, the thing is I completely get why they wouldn’t want to adhere and I know I’d be out there fraternising if it were me. But also my MIL who’s mid 60s has been texting us what to do if she dies, my GIL (is that a thing?) is 97 and usually a bad witch but has lived in fear of covid I’ve had to arrange his lamb shanks delivery from across the country! So I feel I have a sense of responsibility to my OAP neighbour not to endanger her even if she doesn’t see the danger? I’m 29 so still just in the highest risk groups who are giving it out to others!

I got a bit of a crappy message back that’s bothered me but tbh I will take the half hour that upsets me over the hours in her house in fear & then terrified for 2 weeks after? Also old ppl don’t always understand tone in texts so she may not have meant it. I spoke to my sister who was like duck that £10k fine, also I don’t want her to die obviously but then an investigation to happen and I’ve gotta explain to her kids why I didn’t give a duck were in tier two and days from a proper lock down?! :/

Thank you guys sorry I just hate the situations this throws up! Also I love a chat with my neighbours I used to end up gone all night after work used to wind my husband up Usually spend Christmas Eve with next door too that’ll be in the bin this year

Oh no, a small amount of awkwardness from pissing off your elderly neighbour is much better in the long run - plus you don't want to set a precedent because she will try and get you to come round all the time if you do it once! Defs stick to your guns, old people can be very bloody persuasive can't they! I was once roped into befriending an old lady who turned out to be absolutely insane, very racist and horrible but also insane - she called me constantly and I kept visiting every week and stressing out about it until one day I was like hold on what the duck am I doing? So I cut contact. I felt a bit bad at first but it was a veryyyyy bad vibe, I always felt slightly cursed when I left the house

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

What everyone else said, basically. You've got to decide what you're comfortable with and stick with it. FWIW I think you're doing the right thing, but like you I can see where she's coming from too. Your text is lovely and kind, I think you've got the tone right there. xx



Also, hopefully her kids will say the same thing to her if she mentions it to them. If they hear about it, pretty sure they will be on your side in this.

This is exactly what I thought too - playing it forward imagine if the worst happened how could I tell them that I went round?! They’d rightly never forgive me for being so stupid! I could have it but just be asymptomatic, no one knows enough about this virus do they?!

Also most importantly sending you and partner lots of love, how are you both feeling today?

Oh no, a small amount of awkwardness from pissing off your elderly neighbour is much better in the long run - plus you don't want to set a precedent because she will try and get you to come round all the time if you do it once! Defs stick to your guns, old people can be very bloody persuasive can't they! I was once roped into befriending an old lady who turned out to be absolutely insane, very racist and horrible but also insane - she called me constantly and I kept visiting every week and stressing out about it until one day I was like hold on what the duck am I doing? So I cut contact. I felt a bit bad at first but it was a veryyyyy bad vibe, I always felt slightly cursed when I left the house

sorry I know I shouldn’t laugh but this is exactly the sort of thing I would do and die over! It’s weird cos people are like oh they’re just old that’s why they’re like that, hold up what?! Not every old person is racist it’s just the bad racist ones that choose to be!

You’re so so right though thank you, I completely get her PoV but we’re not apples and apples init I can’t go over there with a clear conscious! It’s awful but my sister has had to do the same with me, I’d happily have her come stay with us but she’s in manc so wouldn’t risk it. Our MIL is similar to us in shielding and we did consider going to live with her for a bit but them going into tier 3 suddenly fucked that. Like it’s creating tough situations for us all isn’t it

 

[Grizzlybear]

@heretoreaditall2019 it’s not on you, honestly. It’s sad she is lonely/bewildered, but you didn’t create this scenario and you have a new baby, and that lady is vulnerable. You’re not being an hole for the sake of it. We all miss having people round and normality, but I really hate the idea of her being crappy with you!

 

[PoorPatrol]

@heretoreaditall2019 I was going to chime in with the others, but then read that she’d sent a crappy message back! No no. No. Nope.

I’m very understanding of the fact that some people have absolutely had it with this load of tit, and are willing to take risks rather than live in misery. Loads of older people have taken the same attitude. I get that, but nobody should be pressuring other people to take risks for them. That’s so out of order, and I do find older people to be excellent at the passive-aggressive/guilt-tripping talk. You’ve got a tiny baby and are (hope I’m remembering rightly) at higher risk yourself? Come on! You’ve offered to chat on the drive, what more should a person ask of a neighbour?

I hate to think of you feeling bad about this, you haven’t done anything wrong, and in fact have tried to be as kind as possible. It’s like with drink driving, it’s not just the person getting behind the wheel who suffers from that risk, it’s everyone else. Which is why it’s absolutely not cool for a person to down ten pints, and then say it’s ok to drive because they accept the risk to themselves. Same with these people relaxed about COVID, yeah it’s great that you aren’t terrified, but it’s not ok to assume that other people should suffer the consequences of your risk taking.

 

[NP]

You’re doing the right thing @heretoreaditall2019. She’s put you in an awkward position because you now feel worried and anxious over upsetting her, when you’re just following the law and trying to keep her and your family safe! She’ll survive without a chat and baby cuddles. Literally! If she wants to ignore the government’s advice, that’s on her but don’t feel guilty for not being party to it.