Good lord, I go help put up Christmas with my husband and eat dinner, and half of you are putting me out of a job with your screenshots. (I am kidding...) Let's do this!
Screenshots and Sarcasm: Need a shower edition
Oh look. Glad to see her shopping edition is still very much an issue. At least they have plenty of toilet tissue because they are going to need it with their cheese laden diet!
Poor Ass. He is overworked at his job. Three vlogs in one day! We have to hit certain talking points. The sponsored videos need to be approved. Blah! Blah! Blah!
Oh the shade Ass threw passing Peloton.
This obvioulsy a higher end shopping district. The Bath and Body Works candle sale ($24.95 normally, $9.95 this past weekend) is why people are lined up outside. Poor Cilly was too preoccupied faking sympathy for a business that closed because of coronavirus. Hey Massives, if more people listened to the scientists by social distance, wear a mask and wash your hands (like the scientists have asked), we may have avoided this second and more dangerous wave that is gripping our nation.
Can you imagine the amount of germs floating around her $$$ kitchen? Well, it is even worse because she insists on washing the turkey. Some chef you are.
May we have a moment of silence in honor of these burned turkeys? Was she going for a charred skin, instead of krispy?
Keep trying. You are never going to be sponsored by Dunkin, no matter how much you beg. (Didn't I just mention in the one of the last screenshots how Dunkin isn't featured? Nice to see you noticed my work.)
These people would die if they didn't have their phones or vlogging equipment at all times.
So they left Abbie to entertain herself while they went about their busy day. Then they get mad because she made a mess.
She is super stimmy it seems. This looks so uncomfortable. But she sure heard and reacted to the dinner call. Peep the dirty feet.
Sandy really is a photogenic and beautiful dog. No snark here from me. Consider it your "palate cleanser."
Have they still not figured out how to turn on the heat? (Yes, Cilly said in a IG story that they didn't know how to do it during the cold snap.) Pat yourselves on the back, you scammed the leghumpers to buy your junk ornament drawn by
Abbie everyone else.
Let's discuss your Christmas tree. I don't care if you don't watch too much TV, Abbie does. So it is a big deal if it is in her line of sight. You have a fair amount of room to push it back and out of the way. Why? One it won't block her view. Two, it would be out of Abbie's reach when she sits on the couch.
Yes, your tree is listing/leaning. It isn't because of those filters you use to slim and alter Cilly. You have large holes with no lights. But I see you did trim the top for the star. It is sad that you have now regulated Maverick from "his spot" for those cheap China knock-off decorations.
The next day...
Let's start with a nose swipe. I am sure you followed the rigid standards when cooking this meal for the less fortunate homeless community. Oh no, you have to go back to the store! What didn't you buy?
Way to grab the most unflattering shots of Cilly. But yeah, the leghumpers will say how slim Cilly is. Sorry to burst your bubble Cilly, the black clothes you are wearing are not slimming or doing you any favors.
Just let the poor girl eat her cereal in peace. This is a sign that she doesn't want to be filmed. Sad that a stranger can see what isn't obvious to you.
You are about to cook meals for the homeless, and look at the state of Abbie's feet. Between the animals in the kitchen, your family's inability to keep their hands away from the nose and mouth (with no hand-washing or sanitizer) and the germs from washing the turkey before cooking, this is an e coli outbreak waiting to happen.
So which is it Ass? She can take her cereal bowl to the sink, rinse it out and put it in the dishwasher with no prompting and a lot of enthusiastic cheering and high fives from mom. Or she needs to be heavily prompted to do each step? Pick one.
Just be glad she got the spoon to the dishwasher. Are you asking her for too much after all that heavy prompting to put it in there properly? How about you give her a chance to fix her error before you grab her hand to do it.
I don't think Cilly dyed her hair black, I think she needs a shower. Just like the other family members. But listen to her give orders to Ass to fix the Christmas tree.
Dude needs to be decontaminated. A simple shower is not going to fix this hot mess.
Sandy is chasing her tail out of boredom. Take fifteen minutes and throw the ball in the backyard with her. (I would suggest a walk, but we know you abhor any exercise.)
Sorry these are late. But Christmas lights took priority. I hope you enjoyed.
