Fathering Autism #5 Asa lies and Priscilla cries

[Baymaus]

Spent today in NOLA puttering in the suburbs. To get to the mall we crossed Napoleon Avenue and then I saw this shirt. Coincidence? I think not.

Edited to actually attach the picture.

 

[Pink Marshmallow]

I believe Cilla is emotionally cold as well...unless it’s “girly” stuff

But the coldness is directed at Abbie. She shows LOTS of emotion when it comes to Isaiah, his football stuff, not wanting him to move away, crying endlessly about both of those things and more. She's definitely capable of being warm emotionally... just not so much when it comes to Abbie. Like you said, she makes an exception when Abbie does something that's girly and kinda close to being what an NT teenage girl would do.

 

[LYsySA]

the last few vlogs seem to directly answer or address a variety of things that have been brought up here (sensory toys or lack thereof, blanket in the car, where’s Brandi, etc).

Hi, Asa. I feel for your family. I recognize the flinching they do whenever you get snarky or frustrated and they are close by. I don’t pretend to know your life- but I do know that almost nothing you’ve produced in the last year, at least, has done anything to raise awareness about Autism. Why don’t you address Abbie’s other diagnoses, as well? Don’t you think that might help others understand? Most of your audience, past and present, wants to do just that.

I think it’s time for a channel name change. It’s really always been The Asa Show.

Nah call the channel:

How to "father" a disabled cashcow

 

[WoahThatsCrazy]

They do thigs like that a lot. They all take food from the counter as it is being prepared, as MOST people do. But Abbie is not allowed. But for Asa to make a TiKTok basically inviting her to take a bite for views? That is just baiting her and it's sad.

They play really rough with her and hold her down but when she gets rough with mom, she gets scolded.

More and more she is treated like a brand or commodity and not a human being. Just like her room...that room was not decorated for her at all. When Asa says she doesn't like things on walls while putting things on her walls? They set her up for failure, then record it.

The fans that seem to get off on watching this girl be in distress are just plain weird. Something is wrong with them.

Exactly, plus, I don't know if they keep Maverick up on his shots too... Then the new kitty... The new puppy could have easily spread those germs from her to them... You can tell by the hip movements, that there is something wrong with the puppy's hips and that alone immediately screams "back yard breeder." We have lots of them here and they are trying to shut them down, for this reason alone, because they sell sick puppies..


I feel like if I say to much, I will give myself away.... But, I watched his video and maybe a male's version is that they replace all these things with anger... I can say, in my eyes, I didn't replace the "future" with anger. I replaced the "fix" with anger because there was no "fix." Recently, we have had another issue come up with 2 of our kids. It is a major medical issue. Once again, I am stuck into the arena of that there is no "fix" to their new disorder. I am basically told that we can minimize it, do some medications to help easy to symptoms but again, there is no "fix."
You can only imagine the anger that I have, to know that there is something "different" about your child and there is no "fixing the difference" to make them just like a regular, normal person...

But you don,t *need* to fix us (I'm autistic too) to make us 'normal'
The way we think, behave etc *is* our normal. Feel free to check out cites like 'NeuroClastic' or FB grous like 'Autism Inclusivity' and you can connect and relate, or let your kids connect and relate on there

Just watching now.

It's all so sad the way they treated her. I think all these parents feel threatened by an actually autistic adult because we can see easily things they do which aren't necessarily beneficial for their kids.

Ditto!

 

[Baymaus]

But the coldness is directed at Abbie. She shows LOTS of emotion when it comes to Isaiah, his football stuff, not wanting him to move away, crying endlessly about both of those things and more. She's definitely capable of being warm emotionally... just not so much when it comes to Abbie. Like you said, she makes an exception when Abbie does something that's girly and kinda close to being what an NT teenage girl would do.

I think it's important to note that she can be warm with Isaiah when he is doing well. She beams with pride when he achieves, helps out, is honored. But when he comes to her asking for help with anxiety, her initial response is to tell him to suck it up. Her love and warmth are very conditional. Isaiah is just able to do more of the things that bring it out.

 

[WoahThatsCrazy]

I think that's a good way to put it. There is only so far that they can connect with Abbie and for the most part it really is a lot of surface level stuff. Is she hungry? Does she need to go to the bathroom? Does she want music? etc... but nothing deeper than that. There have been a few videos where Abbie was upset or in a bad mood but they have no idea why. So, they go through a lot of trial and error to help get her in a better mood. Not only is that frustrating for A&P, but I would imagine it's very hard on Abbie as well. They need to put more options on her communication device so that maybe she can have more options to describe what she's feeling other than bath, golf cart, or nature valley bars.

Last sentence! Why do they not put more options, or teach her more words, I wonder? Especially when she was you ger and more alert?

 

[LYsySA]

Last sentence! Why do they not put more options, or teach her more words, I wonder? Especially when she was you ger and more alert?

I never understood why they didn't put the word "no" or "stop" on there, something she definitely understands. Then i realized that if they did she would use it and they would have to listen to her.

 

[WoahThatsCrazy]

I never understood why they didn't put the word "no" or "stop" on there, something she definitely understands. Then i realized that if they did she would use it and they would have to listen to her.

Ah ha, ofc! Other people in other forums (actually FB) have said the same

 

[jadedandcaffeinated]

You'd think it would be a priority to teach her the difference between needing the bathroom and needing alone time, but they don't seem to care. They explain WHY she constantly asks for the bathroom, but in the past few years haven't even tried to give her the tools to ask for alone time when she needs it.

 

[ABAPQueen1995]

And that's why the ABA isn't working for her. Not saying that ABA is good to begin with.

I thought in the FA video about them redoing the room A said she was 14? If she was born in 2005, she'd be 15 this year.

And also ABA is abuse and causes PTSD which is another reason why it doesn't work for her. They can teach her skills without using ABA methods. I'm autistic myself and I can tell it doesn't work for most autistic people. I saw previous videos and I could definitely tell she was not enjoying it and all she wanted to do was be herself and have fun

 

[lillibb]

@bonkbonkbonk. I have wondered why she waited 5 years to apply for all the government benefits too.
Could it be that she didn't know where he was and it took the DSS 5 years to finally find him?
I'd have to study the dates closer. I know they stated that they lived in Greenville and/or Elizabeth City NC for a while after Abbie was born. Then moved to Florida.
It very well could have been they couldn't locate him for 5 years I suppose. Unless her family has resources, I can't imagine her waiting to get benefits for her baby for 5 years.
#interesting

If he was still in Coast Guard all she would have to do is to contact his CO, they would have found him quick!

 

[Stripe69]

[QUOTE

P at her natural habitat
View attachment 87430

i know. They are so desperate for dunkin to sponsor them

Spent today in NOLA puttering in the suburbs. To get to the mall we crossed Napoleon Avenue and then I saw this shirt. Coincidence? I think not.

Edited to actually attach the picture.

HahA

 

[Coffeefrog]

The thing is, if he had not done that sit down video, most people would have never learned about it all. I never would have dreamed to read elsewhere on the internet about him but now that I have, I see him totally differently - and I am sure I am not alone. It’s not that I care about the fact that he has another child that he hasn’t discussed but it was the way he referred to her and the fact that he has never wanted to get to know her that bothered me as that is what speaks so strongly of his character. Since this all went down when things were sort of rocky in their marriage I’m sure that Priscilla has a big part in not wanting him to get to know the child because that would take away from the time he spends with them and she was very insecure at the time so I can picture her forbidding him to have anything to do with the child other than the support.

Me too! I’ve followed them for about a year or so and would never have known until that video. Then I had to know everything so I did some research til I found this website! I now see him completely different.

 

[Sam-I-Am]

But you don,t *need* to fix us (I'm autistic too) to make us 'normal'
The way we think, behave etc *is* our normal. Feel free to check out cites like 'NeuroClastic' or FB grous like 'Autism Inclusivity' and you can connect and relate, or let your kids connect and relate on there

As parents, our job when you are little is to keep you loved, secure, feed, in good health and grow you into human adults that can accomplish anything you put your minds to. If something arises, we are there to take care and fix the problem. It is basic human nature, as being Mom and Dad, to fix it...
I am not saying that it is right that we “fix” Autism. It is the way the brain works and how someone functions. I am saying that it is just how we operate as parents...
When an infant is born, if there is a major medical issue, a parent knows from the start something is wrong, doctors try to fix what they can and whatever is still wrong, sometimes just has to be lived with. They find out from the start though.
With developmental disorders or even massive medical disorders, parents take infants home, none the wiser, we are raising them and then all of a sudden, we start seeing that they can’t keep up with the other infants/toddlers/young children. We take them to doctor and after doctor, therapist and many therapy appointments..
Then, one day, someone sits the parents down and tells them that their child may have Autism and needs to be evaluated for it. They go through the process, evaluations, and then get told that yes, their child is on the Autism Spectrum...
So, what does a parent first want to do? They want to fix it but they learn quickly, there is no fix... There will always be some pain that they cannot fix it... It doesn’t mean we are right, we are just human and basic human instinct is to fix problems and find solutions..

Also, like my 2 children that have a very rare disorder that was just found, again, it is a need to fix it. Sadly, there is absolutely no fix. Life expectancy after diagnosis is 15-20 years... Usually the anxiety/depression of being diagnosed and living with their disorder, will drive them to suicide. Now we add in that both have anxiety due to them being on the Autism Spectrum. Our counselors have time on strict watch for suicidal behaviors. For two teenagers, that isn’t easy all the time, when they are out with their respite workers, which also know... Again, not something that I, nor the doctors, can fix because it is so rare... There is pain knowing that you can’t fix the problem...

 

[ThePerfectShine]

The wording in this court order is interesting.
I wonder if Assa had the responsibility to notify the court about his change of income?
It is not clear, yet it definitely states what it states.
"To be reviewed upon respondent being employed".
I am pretty sure it has never been reviewed.
#interesting

I’m catching up on all the threads here as I am new, but just for the record...I am single mother to 16 year old daughter and my child support was figured up in 2005...we are just middle class working people and I receive $243.69 every TWO WEEKS. That’s DOUBLE what Asa has to pay and he’s supposedly worth MILLIONS. My daughters dad works construction and busts his butt to care for her and her little brother by a different woman. Asa should be doing a helluva whole lot more...

 

[PhartBlossom]

Mornin'

I wonder of Brandi watches his vlogs etc? If she saw the lollipop video and the tiktok of Asa and his sandwich, I am sure she would see why Abbie is stealing food more. When you dangle food in front of a kid's face? She may take a bite.

 

[KeepinItReal516]

Did she give you any “hoops?” Wtf ... these people want her too be a “typical teenager” and a “big kid” so badly but they still treat her like a toddler. Since they read all these comments, I hope they can shed some light on the following in the next tit shows:

- how did Abbie learn to be mean? How is it that she knows how to pinch to the point where it hurts people but she doesn’t know how to push a button??!
- why do they feed her and themselves so much junk? It’s not cute that she constantly is asking for candy and that they constantly reward her with candy. Also, when she wants a drink, why is it always orange juice? At least get a better brand than the sugar infested Tropicana ... how about water once in a while? P had the nerve to say that Abbie has a well balanced diet. Obviously she has no clue what a well balanced diet is. They need to see a nutritionist that can help them think of better ideas especially for a teenager who is constantly asking for candy
- A had the nerve to say that Brandi cancels when she has other kids that need her more. Bullshit! More like they realized that the therapy isn’t doing tit for her but they had to respond to the comments here
- why the hell are they just now working on her eating habits? Is it just because of the camera?? Did they suddenly start to feel embarrassed that she shoves food in her mouth and steals from others?? I mean I really feel like this could have been worked on earlier in life when she first started feeding herself ... but then again they still spoon feed her like she’s a toddler. It’s not funny that she takes huge bites, shoves an entire cookie in her mouth, bites the entire scoop of ice cream off a cone in one big bite ... like damn. A had the nerve to say “isn’t that cute?” When she stole someone’s fries ... no it’s not bleeping cute. Actually quite ridiculous and animalistic- yeah I said it

I just smh every time I watch this tit show cause they have for sure set her up for failure. And doing all this tit for the cameras but they would have just let her be and not “work” on anything if it weren’t for their vlog. Seriously eating habits are like the first things you work on in life.

Also can you guys imagine going to the movies and Abbie is in the theater screaming and yelling ??? I really don’t understand why this family likes to push their limits like that, at the expense of not only embarrassing their daughter but also others experience. She doesn’t even watch movies at the house. Save me the “we wanna take her out and have her enjoy things” crap. Please

 

[PhartBlossom]

They absolutely set her up for failure, over and over.

It is painfully obvious these two obese people have no clue about proper nutrition. P is one of those who thinks surgery is the answer but that is just a small portion of what you must do to lose weight. That surgery looks to me to have been a complete failure.

I wouldn't be surprised if Brandi quits soon. Her work there is like a dog chasing it's tail.

I noticed the woman from the school that brought Abbie to the car in the last video did not seem happy. People are probably tired of knowing every time they go near this family it will be filmed. I know I would be like "please get the camera out of my face, I'm trying to do my job."

They play very rough with Abbie, she probably doesn't understand the difference between her pinching someone and them restraining her to tickle her, or restraining her and then spraying setting spray right in her face. How is she to figure that out? If they want her to be gentle, they must gentle. See Isiah lifting that boy up in the video of "dinner with friends", he grabbed him so hard around the waist, it made the kid cough and slightly gag. He was flipping that poor kid around, why? Is it passive aggression or just stupidity?

 

[uncannyvalley]

Those other families who went with them to Disney must look at Abbie and thank their lucky stars their children are not like her. I was watching an older video where Asa said Abbie is a really hard case, and that even her therapists have said so. She is not representative of autism in general AT ALL. She is wayyyy more far gone than most. Her issues go well beyond ASD.

 

[melryou83]

If he was still in Coast Guard all she would have to do is to contact his CO, they would have found him quick!

Ok okay guys I've been here a while but I just have to say for my personal experience me knowing exactly where the bio dad was home address telephone number work address antelephone number it took me 3 years to get a child support order and then another four months before I got any money from it this was partially because it was an interstate case which means that's two states working together so she may have filed when the child was born or after and it just took that long especially if he questioned it in any way shape or form and with him still being married she had to prove Without A Reasonable Doubt she was with him before they would even make someone go for a DNA test at least that's the way it works in my state