Fathering Autism #24 Pullups, messy hair and dirty feet. Hambeasts can’t parent but they sho can eat!

[cucumber]

Do you suppose it was found out that there was lying going on about reaching goals on IEPs?
I dunno what to think.
Something happened to Abbie's time with Brandi getting reduced to 1 day a week and we know it wasn't because Abbie had progressed. Since lockdown, we have heard nothing from her or about her. Not even a FaceTime therapy once a week. You know Assa would film it.
I wonder if therapists in this field are not truthful on these documents just so they can get paid.
As I mentioned before, unless Abbie's goals are things she can actually do, I am bewildered as to how she can meet goals at all.
Just my opinion.

Even with the virus lockdown, you'd think they'd mention her or something. It's like she's fallen off the edge of the earth.
I wouldnt be at all surprised if she never comes back.

 

[Sam-I-Am]

I know a 17 yr old severely IDD/Autism that has to be put to sleep for every dental procedure. @Sam-I-Am, do they have to do this with your child too? I wonder if putting Abbie to sleep for medical is even an option. It at least an option that can be discussed

They have stated on one of their live streams that Abbie is sedated for dental procedures. I guess medical if necessary would be an option.

My son has never had to be put to sleep for dental procedures....

Okay and maybe I meant to go on a little bit more...

When everyone was talking about orthodontic braces. There is no way an orthodontist will put braces on under sedation. It isn’t because they can’t. It is because of long term care and on going care needed. Abbie would not be allowed to stick anything but food into her mouth. Then, nothing crunchy, sticky or hard is allowed. Her daily Nutra Grain bars would be a huge no-no. Also, brushing her teeth would need to happen 5 times a day and flossing 1-2 times a day... An orthodontist (At least in our area) will not put braces on, if the child/teenager cannot take care of them with just basic reminders...

Just like getting a back brace. Her doctors probably see her rocking and have told them that they need to curb this behavior. Since we see that they haven’t and her curve is getting so bad, there is nothing they can do. Once she would get through surgery, she wouldn’t be able to do the exercises to re-strengthen her back and get it into shape. She would be allowed to go back on the couch, and rock until she undid all the surgery... Surgeons get a good read on people and on going doctor’s notes to back up them wanting to do surgery and they have to show how it will benefit the patient long term...

Sadly, we can see how P pulled the wool over her surgeons eyes. She rarely goes to the doctor, so there is very few notes on her. She then hood-winked the surgeon and paid out of pocket for her weight loss surgery, which is showing a complete failure now...

Abbie would do the same thing. The back brace would go no where. She would throw a fit and they would give up after a few days. Surgery would be a disaster... Orthodontic braces, Abbie would have them ripped off by the end of the first day..

 

[Stripe69]

And poor Isaiah..this is the norm for him. He hardly blinked an eye.

The feeders are usually always red, and that is supposed to be enough to attract them.


I wonder if because Asshole prompts her for everything she does, she thinks she is supposed to wait for his prompt even though she knows what to do some of the time? She looked right at that toothpaste drawer, and then looked at him like "ok...prompt me".

I know. How many times has she cleaned her teeth and she still doesn’t know whaT to do. I seriously question how much JSA is of value to her without intensive help at home. It’s like everyone is living a lie, they all know she isn’t capable but everyone is pretending she is, wtf

I don't have as much against Summer as some people here - which is cool - differing opinions are fine. To me I just see a young girl who tried to spread her wings in New York and just realized she wasn't cut out for it. I know a lot of people who had the same experience with NYC. I'm guessing she didn't want to move back home, and A&P had been pushing her hard to move in with them. She was offered not just free rent but the chance to make some money in a very comfortable home job environment. At 21, I'd have taken that deal. She's gonna make it through college with way less debt just on the rent saving alone. Plus she's studying to be an ABA therapist eventually, right? Just in the undergrad portion now. But saying she has live in experience with an autistic teenager will probably look impressive to grad school teachers/etc. Basically - I think on paper this had nothing but positives for Summer.

As far as A&P's motives - that's where I get aggravated. It doesn't at all seem coincidence to me that they wanted Summer in before Isaiah left. I think she's the replacement older sibling. Someone that, when the world isn't so weird and normal life resumes, they can dump Abbie on for their "date nights" or call it respite without having to pay her or use their paid respite hours. I don't think she was ever brought there to be anything but surrogate oldest child to be taken advantage of in that way, and then they realized they could pawn some of the grunt work of their professional day to day off on her as well. Now they have her packing envelopes and sending emails too and Priscilla has more time to slap cheap ass clown makeup on her face during livestreams - oh, sorry, I mean, work on her business.

I agree. Look how Arsewipe reacted when Becca came back on the scene, he couldn’t offload Abbie fast enough. You could almost See his relief that he was no longer responsible for the inevitable failure.

She was. She held/hugged Abbie and told her she loved her. Whether for show or not, she seemed much more sincere back then.

It looks like kyphosis to me. Probably aggravated by her habit of always looking down and also rocking back n forth a lot.

I think what we can all see is that her tantrums are as bad as they ever where. This is about a year ago . YoU would think that they would work on this behaviour instead of giving in to her demands. If she was my child I would get my priorities in order, Potty training, tantrums and grabbing food.
What a mess they have created and they are the ones who are stuck with it.

 

[therealamylynn]

Why is Summer jumping around like a demented rabbit in the kitchen?

 

[Sweetums]

My breakdown of Summer is that she’s a socially awkward young adult. She didn’t fit in at college in NY probably because she couldn’t bond with people her own age. She feels more comfortable hanging out with an autistic child, a 17 year old boy and 2 other socially awkward people. I don’t even see Becca as being her real friend, I see Becca as tolerating her because she works for A&P and now Summer comes along with the package. And I think that’s why Becca isn’t as strict as she would like to be with Abbie because Summer just interferes so much and then just does her dumb laugh.

It’s sad because we are all seeing how much Abbie is regressing since she’s not going to school and she doesn’t have Brandy. Which tells me that her parents and her caregivers now are useless in helping her succeed even daily life skills. We all know she will never be independent but they have let her life skills dwindle down! She can’t even go to the bathroom anymore. So then why are our tax dollars being spent sending this child to school if they are perfect happy letting her live like this now!

Did you notice hok w Summer was bragging about Ab getting all her colors right in the pool (of course we don't see that) and if Asshole was filming that little 3-some in the water, you better believe it would have been in the vlog. Thatvis the first time I have heard Summer say anything that involves teaching Ab something. Oh, and Becca was not close enough to Summer to hear that.

 

[Hotographer512]

Well we saw the nighttime routine today. I didnt hear about any bath or shower ......

Who needs a bath or shower when you can wash your face with overpriced crap soap and then rub overpriced crap lotion all over your face, arms and legs?
Oh and dirty feet!!!

 

[therealamylynn]

I don't think she will ever be out riding by herself. She will sadly always have someone next to her pushing her and steering for her.. unless its a downhill and they let her go ...like they did for the money shot which made it look like she was moving on her own.

If she is enjoying being pushed.. thats a good thing if they are willing to push her. The fact that they are most likely not pushing her for her enjoyment but for content and views.. smoke and mirrors for the fan$$zies..

I don't think she'd even be able to know that she has to turn the handlebars to go in the direction she wants to go, and I don't think she has the hand strength to squeeze the brakes or to learn to gently squeeze to control braking. Letting her freewheeling down an incline would not be a good idea.

 

[Hotographer512]

In keeping with the theme of not making up shit to put out here...
I wanted to clear up something.
They did not close their repair shop because it wasn't making money.
They closed it because the city was requiring "new zoning for the building that was outside of their budget".
In addition, was working along side him at the shop.
Not at Lowes full time.
She may have been delivering groceries part time while she worked at the shop, I don't know.
Anyway.
Just wanted to clear that up.

 

[KateK]

Did you all see when they came back from the golf cart ride and after Asss asks Abbie to go to the bathroom.. Isaiah starts saying something and Abbie grabbed his arm and pinched it and pushed him away and Isaiah had this look on his face..like he wasn't too happy about it.

Maybe it was a little crack in the happy narrative.

 

[Hannah'sMama]

This is one of the things that truly frustrates me. A&P's astounding lack of truly communicating with Abbie. Meaning not just talking at her and barking orders and prompting all the time. Actually listening to her when she tries to communicate with her signs or device and not just dismissing her because you want her to do something else regardless of what she wants or how she feels. They also don't really seem to try to figure out the reasons behind some of her behaviors. They just chalk it up to her being difficult, defiant, or lazy. Which, don't get me wrong, sometimes she is those things... but that isn't the case 100% of the time.

I want to heart/co-sign everything in this comment. The very basics of helping an individual, regardless if they're ND or NT, is understanding what is driving a certain behavior. If your child is engaging in head banging (for example), stopping/redirecting the behavior without finding out what is causing it (over/under stimulation, pain, attention-seeking, inability to deal with strong emotion, etc) will only act as a band-aid job.

Then adding to that them undoing any progress she has made at school or with her therapists. It became obvious to me a while ago that A&P expect the school/therapists to do all the work and then A&P can reap the benefits of that and do the very bare minimum to replicate what the experts do. Then there's Asa who continuously decides that he knows best and doesn't have to listen to what the teachers/therapists say and just does things in the ways that are most convenient for him.

This exactly. Someone can take regular piano lessons, but unless they're practicing at home, they'll probably only achieve a limited amount of playing ability. It's the same with OT/PT/ST. I've had to end things with clients who refuse to do any follow through at home. A therapist can only do so much, if the parents don't work at maintenance at home, it's a waste of my time, their time/money, and their child's time.

This is why I still say that Abbie IS capable of more. That she's not completely unteachable or a lost cause. Abbie requires a lot of help, support, care and attention. When she isn't getting those things, she regresses which shouldn't be surprising. When A&P are doing the bare minimum and Asa is doing things his own way, then yes, it's going to appear that Abbie is unteachable or a lost cause. If A&P put in more time and effort, if they followed through with what JSA and her therapists tell them to do at home, I think we'd see a definite difference.

Do I think it's possible for Abbie to become verbal? No. Do I think she's able to understand colors, ride a bike on her own, etc. Honestly, probably not. But if A&P got their shit together, I think she would be a lot more capable than she is, too. We've seen her go to do things on her own only for Asa to confuse her with orders/prompts because she's not doing it the 'right' way. Likewise, he never gives her enough processing time before pointing and/or physically redirecting her hand. While I also think Abbie can be a bit of a brat sometimes (just like most kids and adults), I think a lot of the negative behavior we're seeing is a result of her general frustration and distress with how she's treated by the family. It's not fun to watch.

 

[FrickFrack]

Yeah I would hate to see someone loose their "job" but they really need to get rid of Summer. No offence Summer, but you are too much of a friend. Their relationship becomes more and more innappropriate by the day..low key Fried Green Tomatoes lol.

 

[blindfoldedbobcat]

There’s no ring lights, filters/face tune in real life.

I think they’d all benefit from seeing a Therapist on a regular basis. Family Therapy with all of them (minus Abbie) and individual. One on one Therapy for Isaiah I think would be very beneficial. Idk what all is back open in their area, but they could do abcouple individual FaceTime sessions At home. Isaiah could use Summers room for them. (to not be worried about them listening to what he says) Respectful Parents would stay in the house, out of the backyard until his session was over. (I can picture Assa sneaking to the door with his camera, puting the mic right up to the door, to try and hear what he’s saying ... he’d probably make it a vlog title and thumbnail

They could probably benefit from that, but when Isaiah was promoting that therapy app, Asa left the impression that therapy wasn't for him. Can you imagine Asa taking advice from a therapist?

 

[Hotographer512]

So Amanda Lee is part of that family. I believe it's Cilla. Otherwise why would she comment that she's not fat. He said the family was fat.

View attachment 136767View attachment 136768

I love Barney Rubble!!

 

[whatamidoinghere]

Assa walking around what I'm assuming is TJ Maxx buying P a bunch of discounted crap is really indicative of how much effort he puts into that marriage.

 

[Cbj]

I hope the best for Isiah. He has grown up in that household and doesn’t know any other way of life. Daddy suddenly got money filming their family on YouTube. Isiah stepped up and played his part. He learned his lines and stepped up to his marker. I’m sure the swim scenes in the pool are for the humpers. Good job Isiah.

 

[derr1117]

I'll have whatever Zoe and Kelly are smoking

 

[PhartBlossom]

I think we all would like to know but they won't ever disclose it. They're playing the Autism card in the forefront of everything else that girl has. The saddest thing is she's so young. She's 15. What will life be for her physically 20 or 30 years down the road.

Was looking around at causes of low muscle tone and read this:

Low Muscle Tone: About 30 percent of children with autism have moderate to severe loss of muscle tone, which can limit their gross and fine motor skills. Pain: Some people with autism have very high pain thresholds (insensitivity to pain), while others have very low pain thresholds.

 

[therealamylynn]

Cilla's "small" portion. Glad to know that her surgery paid off. Not.

 

[therealamylynn]

If mothering isn't her 'jam', then why did she decide to become a mother (of two, nonetheless)?

Isaiah was unplanned and I think Abigail was a way to keep him from leaving her again.

 

[KateK]

[

It’s getting worse. This was from a vlog they did a couple weeks ago. Abbie’s neck looks so painful
View attachment 132709

Her neck and back is painful to look at in that pic. I would think physical therapy would be a priority for her.. and the violent rocking.. there is nothing to protect her neck and I can't even imagine how her spine is. I dont recall if she was like this as a young child.

When she does her rocking her head comes forward in an unnatural way.. almost like a chicken moves their head forward.

I have read that kyphosis can be really painful, is usually corrected with surgery and can affect breathing and could also cause weakened muscles in the lower body.