Emmylou Loves #76 The keg on legs who loves African types and free packs of intimate hygiene wipes

[AlovesnewFezza]

She’s had those clothes on all day
Including a long dance session. I can’t fathom how she thinks it’s ok to go out like this.

She probably used her wipes and aired her vag with the Mitsubishi air conditioner on her way to beats.

 

[Emmy-Loo Loveless]

For those new to EmmyLoo this is her dad with whom she’s suddenly become obsessively invested in his heritage.

He’s also vegan, only eats raw salads and smoothies and works out everyday. Maybe she should start taking on some of those traits. Her colon would appreciate it.

 

[Super Cute]

Just a lil reboot of an oldie but a goodie

 

[Woowoopoopoo]

I honestly think shes teetering on a very fine line of this being cultural appropriation.

Her father is white..
Like what
It's all getting a bit weird and uncomfortable now.
People's cultures are not a latest "fad" Amy!

 

[Whiskers1]

There's many reasons I miss living in Port Melbourne.
Missing this idiot flopping around dancing on the pier that I walked past daily, is just one of them.
Hey Mumma, I can literally see Port Phillip Bay through your camel toe.....

 

[gemmagucci]

What I don't understand is if she's that unhinged he has to supervise her, why the fuck is he enabling her shit behaviour by filming and photographing her? Make it make sense!!

Aaron is too dumb to be in charge of supervised visits. Supervised visits are court ordered. These two are thick as two bricks. They enable each other. Wish everyone would just get off the story that Lazylou can’t look after her children bc she has supervision requirements. Facts are Lazylou isn’t interested in looking after her kids. Full stop. Aaron is never going to have his balls. Full stop. Stop asking.
They’re both happy being run of the mill nobodies enabling each other. He loafs around doing not much and she does not much. It’s a win win Situ. They’re both lazy AF. He hangs around her cause its easy. They claim its amicably parenting. Its convenience.

 

[Super Cute]

I took one for the team @Super Cute and asked for a birthday shout out for my friend Cat. She ignored my message

Big Love to you meet you at 1:30am for wings n pings

 

[Hereforthecheezels]

So a bit more sleuthing as I procrastinate about going to do food shopping…..

Jess doesn’t appear to be in any pics anymore on ZM insta - ZM also does not follow her personal page nor her Positive HR page and Jess does not follow ZM page. Something has definitely gone down in the last few weeks as she had that story a few weeks back when Jess came back from holidays and Amy told her not to go away again and leave her alone (same time SallySue was in Sydney).

Did Jess just get sick of her shit/selfishness/language/crassness etc?? Is Jess all of us??

 

[YankeeRoo]

 

[Super Cute]

Sorry Cutie, I wished you a happy birthday so I’m hoping that didn’t add to your blocking.
imagine going out to dinner with FezzaLou and she spends the whole time telling you to film her. It would piss me off and I’d never go to dinner with her again.

Not at all, I loved my fake birthday shout-outs

I take full responsibility for my blocking but ya can’t keep a cute cat down fezzas!

 

[Broken_vase]

Dance like you’ve been electrocuted #rhythmisadancer

 

[BudderBall]

Might be an unpopular opinion here but I reckon she’s so manic she probably doesn’t require the hardcore drugs… she’s definitely unstable - with or without the chemical additives.

She is 100% a narcissist. She sees no wrong in ANYTHING she does. Which is why she can party and behave like she does - she simply does not fault herself in any way and most certainly cannot truly reflect how others around her may see her.

I can’t recall exactly why I followed her initially - but I feel her sense of joy and naivety perhaps was enjoyable to begin with - until I soon realised it’s simply entitlement and self absorption neatly disguised in a c*nt wrapper.

 

[Director of Mugs]

The African way?

 

[Buttercup725]

I have plenty of friends who live like AmyLou. They’d eat out 3 times a day, be out 4 nights a week, spend money on themselves like mad coz they’ve got the cash…. BUT NONE OF THEM HAVE CHILDREN. I swear becoming a mother was the biggest mistake this silly orca ever made. She’s just not a mum. Not maternal. Not selfless. Not in possession of one single characteristic that a mother needs. There’s an increasing number of women choosing to or simply not finding the right circumstances to have kids and thoroughly enjoying their freedom of time and finances. AmyLou seems to think she’s one of them. Which conveniently forgets the THREE CHILDREN SHE GAVE BIRTH TO. She’s such a failure.

(Also don’t hate me but my family and I ate out for breakfast, lunch and dinner yesterday coz food and shipping are hard yards for me and it was Saturday and I’d rather my fam eats well even if it means spending $100s )

I have no kids but my pets are my responsibility. I just dropped $1500 on my cat trying to see if she has cancer. All I want right now is to go out and get a veggie burger with a massive amount of French fries but I know I just spent $1500 so I am at home and will eat here. That's what responsible parents do, whether they are furry kids or human. She is disgusting.

 

[Oops I did it again]

Congraulations @StickyTapeTits - you are a thread title winning legend!

You win some Barely Hygiene intimate wipes - CentreLink SallySue kept her pack, but Emmy loves to stink - so you get her spare pack

You also get a free ride around Sunshine with SallySue to air out your vag. Good speed!

 

[meg_snarkle]

Back in the day when I was waitressing there were certain regular customers who really seemed to believe we were friends and the cafe was a sort of second home to them.

We would fuss over the regulars because - it’s called hospitality - but always felt it was weird and we would laugh about them behind their backs because, newsflash, we weren’t actually friends, we were just being paid to be nice.

I know that sounds horrible but it’s true.
Moral of the story - get yourself some real friends.

I see parallels …

 

[Gomi goner]

Bloody hell, new thread, again?!?!

I just wanted to comment on her latest bullshit promotion of ashwaganda and journalling... why the fuck would anyone believe this kind of shit promotes refreshing sleep or helps with stress in any way when she very consistently complains of poor sleep and displays some very fucked up signs of emotional instability?!?!

She is the WORST example of well it all works!!!

 

[GeorgieBox]

Omg it IS fun! Ahhaha

 

[KmartByron]

AppropriatorLou and her midlife crisis are two separate issues for me.

It wouldn’t matter how successful and put together someone’s life is, the cultural appropriation would still be problematic. Even if Bec Judd with her millions and her established brands and partnerships decided to suddenly adopt Melbourne’s African community as her own and was attending nothing but Beats events, cooking African food and calling it ‘so special’, had a whole new group of friends that were only African, put a South African flag in her bio (I’m pretty sure her dad is South African?!) despite being WHITE African, started attending local basketball matches of teams almost exclusively filled with young African men, ditched all other organised exercise in favour of African dance classes etc etc, it would be hugely questionable and you’d have to wonder what the fuck the intended outcome was. Not many influencers do things without financial incentive either, so you’d also have to wonder how this new obsession was improving her bottom line. And that’s all separate from AmyLou being a shithouse mother in the midst of a mid life crisis.

I’m sorry, what you say is 100% right, and serious, but I cannot get the image of Afrobeats Bec Judd out of my head!

“Bye for now”, Bec says from the middle of the dance floor at Beats, doing her signature two-handed scrunch/wave down the barrel, whilst attempting to copy some girls dancing next to her, with her jerky, hip-bone led dancing. The Postcards crew pack down their camera equipment, and Bec steps out of her J’aton of shit dress (#iykyk), and is left standing in her Jaggad one-piece leotard, a retro piece from their Australian ballet launch a couple of years ago. She gestures towards Nards, who slides over with a fresh plate. Then she looks around the room, bodies starting to glisten with sweat as they pick up the steps Bec saw all that time ago at the Port Melbourne pier.

Suddenly from out of almost nowhere, EmmyLou bursts through the crowd, resplendent in her baby blue bike pants with matching crop. She’d even gotten her latest pair of Nike Dunks customised in baby blue to match. “Here I am” giggled Lou at her party friend, tossing Bec a Zoe Moss 2023 classic, a striped shirt to tie up over her leotard. “Thanks” Bec said, as she shot Nards a pained look and gestured for some more plate. She was gonna need it to get through the night - only two more years of her Jaggad/EmmyLou partnership to go and it was really starting to drag. She’d only wanted to expand her market to the youth, get more of the Saturday 8am after the night before crowd, instead of the Saturday morning 8am kids sport drop off and Brighton Pilates crowd.

But how the fuck she ended up in a multi-year deal with EmmyLou one word, she had no idea. It was all that stupid bitch Lana Wilkinson’s fault. ‘She’s the Queen of the Beats’ Lana had screeched at her one night out. ‘They love her, she’s so influential’. Well Lana couldn’t have been more wrong, except of course when it came to her ill-fated shoe line and her insistence on still using see-through plastic on most of her creations. ‘Bloody Lana, she was wrong about clacky mules and she was wrong about EmmyLou and The Beats’ she thought angrily, as Lou sidled up, 4 cameras in hand, grabbing some selfies of her & Bec for the socials on each camera, before scurrying back to the side of the dance floor, hoping to get picked to dance on stage whilst she rotated through and posted happy snaps of the ‘besties’ across various channels.

Poor Bec, she could do nothing but take a big breath in, adjust her Zoe Moss, and plaster a smile on her face. With Nards trailing behind, ever faithful carrying the plates, Bec strode towards the dance floor purposefully, on the hunt for the next Brown Cardigan to take home and impale her, whilst her hubby Chris, once Australia’s most celebrated athlete, sat in the corner crying/masturbating at the sight of his wife being split in two.

 

[exflighty]

EmmyLou #77- fresh new kicks, still chasing the beats dicks , guzzling down defrosted ox stew, Emmylou making us all want to spew