Emma Hill #4 Turd of a human being

[pasodoble]

Many thanks to @Silly Sausage for the thread title!
Life at the beige bunga continues, as Emma and Simon entertain themselves with exciting activities such as making biscuit pyramids, filling storage jars with nuts and seeds, and painting everything in Little Greene Joanna (including the gym equipment). Now she lives a quieter life just off the motorway in rural Kent, Emma entertains herself by eating three weeks' worth of pastries in 24hrs and working at her angles, whilst setting up a tripod and pretending to take photographs in a mirror that doesn't exist. She also appears to be gearing up for a world record in how many different shades of wood can you cram into one house and just how long can you string out a balayage, before you are forced, kicking and screaming, to go to a hairdresser. Unfortunately, Emma appears to have spent all her money on overpriced Toteme sweaters and 159 pairs of identical Veja trainers and has no cash left for a haircut. With tumbling views, no original content and desperate for some aff links, she decides to make a riveting video all about ... candle making

(sorry, dozed off there for a second)

and when politely challenged about her inability to distinguish weight from volume, proceeded to call one of her subscribers a turd. This was quickly Gleamed away, leaving Emma determined to become a better version of herself an even more miserable cow. She has since found new and innovative ways to insult, patronise and snap at the people who pay for her lifestyle her subscribers, starting with a giant rant about how much she hates birthdays. Meanwhile, Simon sits in the dark silence of his black walk-in wardrobe, staring at his unworn Gucci trainers and wondering how his turd-coloured Yoo Choob channel life came to this.
A plethora of regret.
A veritable plethora of regret.
If you will.

 

[Whatsgoingon898]

Bravo!!! What a round up!!!

Many thanks to @Silly Sausage for the thread title!
Life at the beige bunga continues, as Emma and Simon entertain themselves with exciting activities such as making biscuit pyramids, filling storage jars with nuts and seeds, and painting everything in Little Greene Joanna (including the gym equipment). Now she lives a quieter life just off the motorway in rural Kent, Emma entertains herself by eating three weeks' worth of pastries in 24hrs and working at her angles, whilst setting up a tripod and pretending to take photographs in a mirror that doesn't exist. She also appears to be gearing up for a world record in how many different shades of wood can you cram into one house and just how long can you string out a balayage, before you are forced, kicking and screaming, to go to a hairdresser. Unfortunately, Emma appears to have spent all her money on overpriced Toteme sweaters and 159 pairs of identical Veja trainers and has no cash left for a haircut. With tumbling views, no original content and desperate for some aff links, she decides to make a riveting video all about ... candle making

(sorry, dozed off there for a second)

and when politely challenged about her inability to distinguish weight from volume, proceeded to call one of her subscribers a turd. This was quickly Gleamed away, leaving Emma determined to become a better version of herself an even more miserable cow. She has since found new and innovative ways to insult, patronise and snap at the people who pay for her lifestyle her subscribers, starting with a giant rant about how much she hates birthdays. Meanwhile, Simon sits in the dark silence of his black walk-in wardrobe, staring at his unworn Gucci trainers and wondering how his turd-coloured Yoo Choob channel life came to this.
A plethora of regret.
A veritable plethora of regret.
If you will.

View attachment 1499923

 

[Pulltheotherone]

I second that …. Well done @pasodoble !

 

[icannoteven]

I died at Yoo Choob

 

[Eskimogem]

She’s turning into the turd emoji

 

[HungryHippo]

I think the work I’d use to describe Emma is meh. The house decor is meh, her clothes are meh and her attitude is meh.

 

[Whatsgoingon898]

I think the work I’d use to describe Emma is meh. The house decor is meh, her clothes are meh and her attitude is meh.

EmMeh Hill

 

[meowmeowbeans]

Masterful recap, @pasodoble! All the chef's kisses to you!

 

[Emmas83]

Why buy a headboard in a colour you don’t like and then have to recover it?! She’s got serious issues everything has to have her stamp on it unless it’s designer

 

[Pulltheotherone]

186 comments on a freaking daft headboard.
I shouldn’t even be looking never mind commenting on This as I have two deadlines today so that’s it from me !
BUT - the headboard looks crap.

 

[poopettemetis]

186 comments on a freaking daft headboard.
I shouldn’t even be looking never mind commenting on This as I have two deadlines today so that’s it from me !
BUT - the headboard looks crap.

Can’t wait to be treated to the inevitable “how to upcycle a headboard” hack

IT’S NOT UPCYCLING IF IT’S NEW, EMMA.

 

[coconochanel]

No way did she call a subscriber a turd?

 

[Pulltheotherone]

Coco … WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN !

 

[coconochanel]

Coco … WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN !

Too busy decanting nuts into storage jars to take much notice obviously!

 

[meowmeowbeans]

"Upcycling" needs to go away, along with other meaningless terms like "life hacks". It's just reusing and recycling, people!

Also, that headboard is way too small.

 

[Anabananas]

Upcycling pool hack renovation is back people and boy is Emma enthusiastic about it . Remember, one does not simply go for a swim, one has a pool session.

 

[theeyecollector]

I actually really like the furniture they put in the pool house, much nicer than the black ones in the garden. But surely it’s not a good idea to store all your clean towels in a very humid environment?

 

[icannoteven]

I actually really like the furniture they put in the pool house, much nicer than the black ones in the garden. But surely it’s not a good idea to store all your clean towels in a very humid environment?

I think it’s just for the aesthetics

 

[Drasticactions]

My partner was listening while I watched the pool video. He asked "instead of going out to dinner, does she have a 'food session?' ".


A food session, if you will.

 

[poopettemetis]

I can’t with the rug in the pool house

The baskets will get moldy. The rug will get moldy. The cushions will get moldy.