Elle Darby-Swift #76 'The Texas Chain-Store Ambassador'

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WhiteOrchid

https://giphy.com/kC8N6DPOkbqWTxkNTe
ellyjelly2 said:
jFC!! Sorry to all Americans who are having to suffer this absolute weapon! Look at the bloody state of it. Look at the posing. I’m crying! Chavtastic baby! Even a special tiny crack pic!
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She's not even half as attractive or alluring as she thinks she is!!


I've had Eminem's new song stuck in my head the last few days and now I've got "Guess who's back, back again, Tiny Crack's back, tell a friend"
 
Reactions: 29

peachesandcreamz

I had to zoom in and inspect her face in those pics - it looks like she's been caught off guard mid word, but I think she was going for sultry??....

Also have a word with yourself hun, why are you pouting in cowboy boots and a hat, trying to act casual. Take a normal picture with your husband or children or dogs? Smiling? I don't get this "come to bed" faced shite.
 
Reactions: 26

WhiteOrchid

"QUICK ConnnNnnNnnNnn take the pic!! Like, why do farms smell LiTeRallY like horse shit?? Can't the farmer just manifest away the smell ConnnnUuhhhRrr".....
 
Reactions: 42

NotTrollinJustScrollin

wossupwithagossip said:
Dying laugh at this I don’t think he’s unattractive he’s just a bit too gormless ..wish he would grow a set of balls to put angel-tits in her place
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Thank you for validating me
to provide some further context to this, I went to see Take That last night and thought fuck me Mark Owen was actually pretty fine .
i think I just need a good shag. or a divine intervention
 
Reactions: 18

peachesandcreamz

NotTrollinJustScrollin said:
Thank you for validating me
to provide some further context to this, I went to see Take That last night and thought fuck me Mark Owen was actually pretty fine .
i think I just need a good shag. or a divine intervention
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I do get it tbh!! I think we're seeing the bare minimum from Conman lately - playing with the kids, leaning into Yank life, taking the dogs out, socialising - and for some of us (if you squint hard enough) it almost makes him look attractive.

But yeah, a shag wouldn't hurt us.....
 
Reactions: 9
S

spicyhun

I know it’s already been mentioned but she’s either pregnant, or just alluding to it to increase her engagement
 
Reactions: 7
W

wonderbread

Gossipgoat said:
Yes Elle that outfit does look too boiling for Texas as it’s literally boots. My legs would be sweating as well
Also face of a 50 year old woman (no offence to any women in their 50s)
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I think it’s HILARIOUS that her tshirt says “not my first rodeo” when she hasn’t been to ANY bloody rodeos… the irony
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WhiteOrchid said:
"QUICK ConnnNnnNnnNnn take the pic!! Like, why do farms smell LiTeRallY like horse shit?? Can't the farmer just manifest away the smell ConnnnUuhhhRrr"..... View attachment 2971653
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OMFG!!! These pics have MADE my week . I’m pissing myself at the state of her!
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spicyhun said:
I know it’s already been mentioned but she’s either pregnant, or just alluding to it to increase her engagement
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She’s pregnant with a Chick Fil A burger
 
Reactions: 18
L

Loveitme

ellyjelly2 said:
jFC!! Sorry to all Americans who are having to suffer this absolute weapon! Look at the bloody state of it. Look at the posing. I’m crying! Chavtastic baby! Even a special tiny crack pic!
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girl ,put on some trainers or sandals!
 
Reactions: 5

ellyjelly2

Still laughing over the boil in the bag rice and remembering how she thought she discovered Emma Bridgwater years after everyone else did.
 
Reactions: 21
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